As I've mentioned on here before, we're TTC after a missed miscarriage at 9.5 weeks. So obviously I'm worried about it happening again and all that. When I get my BFP (fingers crossed), what can I talk to my doctor about doing to help me feel better? I plan to ask for a blood test immediately, and another in a week or so to make sure levels are rising appropriately. And an ultrasound as soon as possible, though last time we saw the heartbeat so that won't be as big of a help as it might have been otherwise. Could I maybe ask for more blood tests periodically, or extra ultrasounds? I'm not sure what insurance would cover. I know the main thing is to make the choice to stay positive and relax, but it'll be harder than I think I'm even expecting it to be.
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My midwife wouldn't do anything extra to put my mind at ease when I found out I was pregnant 6 months after miscarrying. Well, she gave us a 9 week u/s instead of our 12 week but that's all. Buuuuuut, there are a lot of girls on here whose docs did whatever they could to lessen the anxiety. Hopefully yours is one of them.
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I have heard that some people get a doppler so they can hear the heartbeat at home. As long as you dont use it too much and use it properly that can sometimes be reassuring
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When I had a mc the first time, I was sent to an Early pregnancy unit for an u/s because my HCG weren't rising appropriately. When I got pregnant following that mc, I asked my doctor to send me back there for blood draws and an u/s because I was very anxious. I was able to have a 48 hour blood draw to confirm things were going alright, an u/s at 7 weeks and a follow up u/s at 9 weeks for extra reassurance. Then I was discharged back to my regular doctor.
I think maybe this isn't possible in the states, or would cost a lot. However, I would certainly ask your doctor for a 48 hour blood draw so you can see that your HCG levels are rising. I bled a lot with my first BFP that ended in a mc and was also bleeding with this pregnancy the beginning which also maybe influenced my doctor in giving me extra attention.
Good luck and I hope you get your BFP really soon!
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Call your insurance and see what they cover. I talked to mine before scheduling my first dr appointment, and they said as long as my ob lets them know I'm officially high risk, they'll have no problem covering me for extra appointments, ultrasounds, and everything for being high risk, given my situation.
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With my RE, our plan is to do betas every other day for the first two weeks until I reach 1500 and then do an ultrasound at 5, 6, (possibly 7) and 8 weeks, at which point their care should start to overlap with an OB and MFM. With our last loss they were micromanaging me to the point that I started to find this stressful, but if your insurance is good about covering labs they should probably cover this.
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@Torchwood: my doc wouldn't do anything except give me a u/s at ten weeks instead of 12.
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Thanks for the responses! I'm hoping I can find a doctor (or preferably midwife) who is really helpful, since we're moving, which gives me the chance to find a new one. And I'll talk to my insurance for sure, which I hadn't thought to do. And the doppler might be worth it, though I think I've read that they aren't usually easy to find a heartbeat with until a bit later, like 12 weeks?
@Dandelion: How would I be able to qualify for officially high risk? Would I have to have another m/c first? One seems like it wouldn't be enough.
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Unfortunately having one miscarriage is very common, and it is difficult to find a doctor who will do much. After one m/c, you will not be considered high risk. Even after two, many doctors will not do anything special.
I think most docs will agree to 48 hour HCg tests since they are fairly cheap and can provide some peace of mind. You may be able to get an earlier u/s for reassurance too. It all depends on your doc and insurance.
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@futuremama: Yeah, I'm relatively young too (28 on the 2nd), so even less concern. That's partially why I'm asking on here what I can do. That way I can see if they'd be willing to do specific things that I request, rather than just saying "what can you do."
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Unfortunately, I'm not sure there is a lot you can do. Because we conceived via IVF (current pregnancy and the two previous ones that resulted in losses), we automatically had a lot of extra monitoring. Several early u/s and blood tests. For the first couple months I basically just survived between appointments and the subsequent call regarding bloodwork. But honestly, none of it really put my mind at ease. Instead it just felt like I had one more week until the inevitable.
I don't remember when or how things started to change, but I'm now nearing 19 weeks and much more able to accept this pregnancy...which isn't to say I don't still worry more than someone who's never had a loss. But things have definitely changed since the first couple months when I really didn't believe things could go well. I think at least part of the turning point was my 13 week NT scan by which time she really looked human and was moving around like crazy.
I guess bottom line is that you can ask for additional u/s and blood tests, but for me they didn't really help me relax. I think that overcoming the fear is just something those of us with prior losses have to go through. And I can only hope that coping with this will make us stronger mothers in the future.
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@Torchwood: I JUST talked to my doctor about this because we are about to TTC. I had a miscarriage at 9 weeks in June. I'm also only 27.
He told me to call him immediately when I get a BFP & he will then call in a prescription for progesterone for me to take daily, as that could help my progesterone levels that were low last time i was pregnant. Might be worth bringing up to your doctor? Best of luck!!!
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@cavalierkcs: Progesterone seems like a good thing to talk to the doctor about. I don't know what mine were like, but I never had the super overwhelming tiredness that most women complain about. Since progesterone is the cause of that (in high enough doses it can actually put you to sleep), it's worth considering.
@FlyingSquirrel: You're probably right that time is going to be the only thing that will truly help. That and maybe distracting myself. In the TWW right now, and we're moving in a few weeks so I'm finding myself much calmer about everything because I have the move to focus on. Also, when I start to think about baby stuff I'm choosing to focus on hoping for twins. I won't actually be sad if it doesn't happen, and it's something I can think about that isn't exactly like last time. And I think it will make us stronger in the end.
And sorry to both of you for your losses. As nice as it is to have an understanding community here, I hate that it comes at the cost of so many losses.
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