Hellobee Boards

With the kids I know, them knowing it makes someone sad to hear that is powerful and increases use. So I usually say something like, "that's ok. You don't have to like everyone all the time, but you do need to use a kind voice." Then I change the topic: "I'm going to go read. Would you like to read with me or go play blocks?"

Great comments and suggestions.

My DD came back one time with "You're a bad mommy" and I told her that no, I wasn't a bad mommy, I was doing my job to keep her safe and healthy. She could be upset with me or mad at me, but I am still a good mommy and will always love her. She seemed to understand.

Yep. We also get "You are making me very sad and upset and frustrated mommy. I am not happy with you." I try not to take it personally, and sit with him and talk about what I did that made him so unhappy. Usually it's something silly, like "You turned on the light" (instead of letting him), but when it's something more serious we talk about why I did what I did and what we can do differently next time. I try to use it as an opportunity to talk about feelings and how to handle them.

ETA: Sometimes I really have to bite back a "well I don't like you very much right now!" although occasionally a "Well, I don't like the way you're acting/talking to me right now"

I just listened to a (Janet Lansbury) podcast about this! The podcast was actually about a child who was showing a strong preference for his mother and would say things like this to the father as a result. So slightly different situation, but maybe still applicable.

Her thoughts:
-It is not true that your child doesn't like you. (Which you probably know, but it's still good to be reminded!)
-They are saying this to work out some big emotions but don't have a better way of doing it; take it as a good thing that they are comfortable sharing this with you.
-"Be the bigger person." Knowing that it isn't really about you, work on acknowledging her own feelings rather than focusing on your hurt. (Since you had a guess of what she was upset about, maybe it would be useful to talk through that with her and, over time, she would be better able to name the thing she was really upset about?_