Hellobee Boards

I was ready before DH, even though we had talked about it before we got married and had a pretty solid time line (start trying about 2 years after our wedding). We did talk about how I was ready, a few times, but I respected that he wasn't yet and that we had agreed on an admittedly arbitrary timeline.

I would say you should talk about it, even if it doesn't change the timeline. Otherwise, if you are anything like me, it will just eat at you and you'll get mad at him for stupid things he has no idea about because you are dwelling.!

I was in the same situation! I was ready, but my husband was still thinking we could wait a few years. It was hard at first, but he came around and now were expecting a baby girl in September!

If you want to go off the pill, I recommend telling your DH about how long it can take for your body to regulate and that you want to use alternative birth control methods. I bought a big box of condoms to reassure him that although I wanted a baby soon, it wasn't going to happen right away. I also recommend telling him you have baby fever so he knows how you are feeling, but don't overdo it. If you swoon at every single baby you see and talk about kids non-stop, he might get overwhelmed and feel pressured. I noticed that gradually my DH started pointing out cute kids or saying things like, "when we have kids..." It also helped that his friends started to haves babies, so he didn't feel like he was the first one.

I think the biggest turning point was when he opened up about his own fears of being a parent. He has had a rocky relationship with own father and didn't want to make the same mistakes. I reassured him that he is nothing like his father and that he would be a great dad. After that, he was ready to start trying.

I admit that in those first few months off the pill, using condoms, I hoped for an "oops" too. But I'm glad we waited until he was ready. I didn't want him to resent me and feel like I made the decision for him.

Good luck to you! Baby fever can be rough, so hang in there!

Good luck, let us know how it goes if you do get the courage to bring it up! My DH kept changing his mind about whether or not he was ready, that was hard - like the first time we had sex without any BC, he pulled out halfway through and said he couldn't do it. That hurt. Then when we really stopped using BC, the next day he started having a freak out about whether or not he was ready - and luckily he changed his mind back the next day, because it turned out that I got pregnant from that very first time. But once that happened and it was a for sure thing he was excited and stopped with all of the doubt (thank goodness!)

@DiamondEyes: lol! Don't chicken out! Hehe. But, you know, I am glad you didn't tell him when he was stressed. My husband *always* has bad reactions if I catch him at a bad time. If I catch him at a good time, he is much more receptive to my ideas.

When we began TTC, my husband would say he was "ready" but, he wasn't. I knew he was nervous and I knew that every month we didn't get pregnant, he wasn't sad. He was kind of like, "oh, that buys us another month".
But, once I got pregnant and it came closer and closer, his excitement went through the roof. Within 15 minutes of LO's birth, he whispered to me, "I was 10 more!" To which I laughed and told him to "keep dreamin'" Funny how the tables turn once they lay eyes on their kiddos