oh god.. i'm soooo sooo happy for my friends but if one more friend annouces that they are pregnant i'm not going to be able to hold back the tears. It feels like FB is having a preganacy boom. I know I am just super jealous and I just have to keep telling myself the reasons for waiting a few more months are really valid. Did anyone else feel like this?? Doesn't help that I am baby obsessed.....
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YES.
I know exactly how you feel!! I'm not even the baby-loving type but once I'd made that decision to have a child in the future, I was like a missile locked onto target!!
We had decided to wait until May 2013 and I was cool with that, I was sure I was..... only.... it seemed an awfully long time to wait..... I made a countdown calendar on Excel at work so I could feel like I was "doing something" about it....
Then one by one it seemed that the whole world was getting pregnant! Every day would see another FB announcement... people I knew when they were little kids themselves were getting pregnant (I'm 31) and I seemed no further down the Excel countdown.... Then another friend got pregnant with twins. Then my BEST FRIEND got pregnant, then another, and another.....
We went for a meal with some other couple friends a few weeks back and I was the only woman there who wasn't expecting. Naturally the conversation was all about morning sickness and maternity clothes and I've never felt so alone. I glugged down my wine and tried not to cry.... I WANTED TO GET FAT AND FEEL SICK FOR WEEKS ON END! Okay, maybe not, but...
I wanted it. I needed it. I obsessed about it all day every day. Which room would be the nursery? Breast or bottle? Boy or girl? And those little tiny baby grows.... aaaaaaaaagh...... love love love....
Finally, for that and a number of other reasons we've decided to bring the timeline forward to NOW NOW NOW and I came off the pill 5 days ago.
So I know how you feel and I have no advice for you at all. I gave in to the baby cravings because they were just too much to bear. Maybe you'll do the same - what's your situation? xx
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@Ali: Thankyou so much for your post... it made me laugh through the tears. I think it makes it worse that we aren't telling any friends or family our plan so I feel I have no one to talk to about it. The reason we are wating til early next year is because we are making a big move mid next year for DH's job. And he/we think that its better to move whilst being pregnant than move with a 2-3 month old. I'm working FT at the moment and when we have kids i'll be a SAHM so we are saving, saving, saving. But now as all these people getting pregnant it has got me thinking... maybe we should have a baby before we move so we'll be close to family with a newborn (when we move we'll be far away from ALL family) oh I don't know its all so hard. I know what you mean about the age thing too I'm 27 and all my "younger" friends are the ones getting pregnant. I am so baby obsessed its not even funny. Everyday I'm reading birth stories and books and researching products. I feel like my body & mind are screaming baby, baby, baby. I want one so bad I can't switch it off.
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It's extremely difficult to wait when you have it on your mind and have all of your friends announcing it. But just try to remember that waiting a couple of months is nothing in the long run, especially if you'll be moving soon. You're right in thinking that it will be SO MUCH easier to move when you're pregnant, than when you have a young baby.
Stay strong! You're almost there!!!
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Okay, I'm absolutely the wrong person to speak to about this because, for me, right now, all common sense is out of the window... and I'm going to totally tell you that you should just say "eff it" and start NTNT now! So promise me you wont listen to my advice, okay?
At the end of the day, my feeling is, you can't plan this stuff. It could take a few cycles to conceive.. and the move will be hard with a newborn OR hard being pregnant because moving is hard! Whatever happens, you will make it work because you have to - and you want to. A friend of mine got "knocked up" by her new boyfriend a few yrs back. They'd been together just a few weeks, she'd only just started a new job and had no maternity pay = she went back to work when LO was 6 weeks old. They had no house, no savings.... and they made it work. Earlier this year, they got married, their gorgeous 5YO at their side. I always say that if you wait for the right time it'll never happen because there's always a reason to wait....
Does hubby know how you feel about the baby situation? I freaked out about how my hubby would react to my baby-craving and it turns out he was pretty chilled about it all. Have you had the discussion?
Can i just repeat - DO NOT listen to me!! I'm a Financial Educator and, you know what, saving is the best thing you can be doing. Save save save.
...but any time you want to have crazy-talk, you let me know! I'll just be here, lurking, reading the birth stories, practicing taking my temperature and obsessing away the minutes until my periods start again (sorry, TMI!).
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@Ali: omg.....i just had a chat to DH which lead to us makin a pros & cons list which led to....well some interesting conversations......
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@BabyBoecksMom: i totally agree...i tried to look at it subjectively.....but on the other hand life is short.....
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@Hanzabelle: OMG, tell, tell tell! (if you want to and when you have time of course). Good stuff, right? I've got my fingers and toes crossed for you.
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I CHANGED MY STATUS TO TTC!!!! haha you were right i just needed to talk to DH...he kept listing all these pro's to start trying now...and all the cons were just what if's... for example there is no guarantee that we'll be moving mid year it could be delayed....and the big one...if we moved when pregnant i'd have to change doctors from the one i've had forever...it just makes so much more sense to start trying now...it still might take til next year to actually get pregnant!!! he seemed to make it like it was his idea to start now!!! so its official we are ditching the bc tooo!!!!! lol....sorry for taking ur advice but im over the mooooooon!!!
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That is so, so amazing! Yippee!! I saw your other post first and I literally squealed!! (I'm insulating the loft as we speak - it's 2pm here - and I kept coming down the ladder to check the laptop to see what he'd said!!)
I'm so happy for you both! But get pregnant before me, madam, and there'll be trouble! I started 5 days before you! (that is a joke by the way, I wish you all the luck in the world for a rapid BFP!)
Oh... there's baby dust in the air, I can smell it!
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@Hanzabelle: Yay!!
And, YES, to your original post, that has been me for the last 6 months. We had a plan to start late summer/early fall (ie, right now) but one friend after another would announce they were pregnant. And sometimes, judge-y McJudgerson would come out and I'd be all, well, we are in a much better place emotionally and financially to have a baby than they are, so why shouldn't we have one first? It's so bad, and I try so hard to stamp those obnoxious feelings out, but sometimes it's really hard. I kept having to have H remind me of the reasons we were waiting and of the fun things we could do this summer not pregnant.
But, now, finally, we are trying! Right on schedule. -
@Hanzabelle: Yay! Congrats on TTC! It *could* take a year to conceive, or you could get pregnant next month (that's what happened to me!) Good luck and have fun!
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@Foodnerd81: congrats on staying on schedule- u must b suuuuuper excited to start trying..goodluck! may baby dust b with us all!!
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@Hanzabelle: I am super excited. Mostly, I also wanted H to be excited, so we had to wait. Now, if only my period would start so we could get a move on. (I'd say TMI but I think there is no such thing around here).
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@Ali: hehhehehe!! sorry for breakin the promise!!!! im so excited!!! yes lots and lots of baby dust!!!!!
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@Foodnerd81: haha no such thing as tmi!!! thats exactly why i was worried about having another chat because i didnt want to pressure him...but hes just as excited and totally keen!
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I definitely get those feelings too. In the past week, three of my fb friends have given birth. I feel happy for them and jealous at the same time.
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This is me, right now. I'm trying very hard to be patient, but it's not easy. While I'm truly happy for all of my friends, I want to be a part of it and it's hard to be on the outside looking in, so to say.
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@Hanzabelle: I can totally relate. One of my favorite coworkers is pregnant (with her 4th) right now of course I'm so happy for her but man I wish I had one too!
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@Hanzabelle: yay! I hear you on the FB baby boom - I've literally just finished putting together gift bags for three different baby showers! We're trying in December (provided weight loss and acupuncturist can get my cycles on track) and I cannot wait! So savings conscious right now so we can achieve our financial goals as well as our health goals!
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We were TTC for 8 months... no BFP and went to a ferility clinic, too. Then we ran into some relationship issues so now I'm not TTC. BFSF (Big fat sad face).
I know we are doing the right thing in strengthening our marriage but now I'm looking at friends who are just starting to TTC and thinking they will have babies when I try again... Shoot, they might have two kids by the then. Then friends who are getting married now and I think they will probably have babies. I feel like everyone is swimming forward in life and I'm treading water. 
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@bluestriped bee: awww that really sucks that you ran into some relationship issues but FWIW I think you are doing the right thing mending your relationship. I think you can never know what is going on behind closed doors so those friends who have kids may have other problems you can't see and wouldn't envy them if you could.
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@bluestriped bee: awww
... I totally agree with @SweetMamaM: though.. your relationship is definately what you should be focusing on...a warm nest for a little one to be brought into. Fertility problems must be so hard to deal with ontop of that so my hat goes off to you for being so strong! Goodluck with everything - you'll be swimming in no time!!
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@SweetMamaM: yaaaay hope all goes well at the end of the year for you! I totally LOVE baby showers... is that weird? Everyone seems to groan at them.... lol
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@Hanzabelle: totally love baby showers, love planning them too! Only co-planning one of the three upcoming showers but loving the opportunity to go baby gear shopping and the chance to oooh and aaah over little baby clothes.
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@SweetMamaM: heheh glad i'm not alone!!
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This is totally me! I've been TTC for five months now and everyone around me (it seems, but that's over amplified I'm sure) has been announcing they're pregnant. Now one of my best friends just got married and I feel like I'm in a race with her, and another friend will start trying in January. I feel like if things continue as they have been, they'll all be pregnant and I'll still be waiting. Not to mention my sister-in-law is pregnant too and my mom's on me to have a kid, but I don't want to talk to her about my struggles. I would kill for a baby...crossing my fingers maybe my luck will change and I'll get to POAS at the end of the month.
To all of you who think about waiting, I'd say there is no time to wait. You may end up like me and it can take forever, and if you get lucky with a baby right away, there's nothing to be upset about. A baby is such a gift!
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I agree! I have baby fever in a bad, bad way. However DH doesn't even want to talk about it at this point
But FB is exploding with baby announcements, it's crazy! Every day in my newsfeed I see where like eight or nine of my friends posted from "Baby Gaga."
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Agree!! I've had like 4 people on facebook announce in the last month or two....:-(
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Meee. I just graduated law school, took the bar, and am waiting on a job and bar results. I just started a paid fellowship with a law firm, and now my baby fever is creeping back up! We want to start ttc after we've been married for a year (Mar), and I don't want to be pregnant in a wedding I"m in next summer. Ideally, I'll have a full-time job by next summer, and then we can throw caution to the wind. Because right now, a paid fellowship isn't enough cushion to feel comfortable ttc. But, I have fertility worries (which may or may not be substantiated), so who knows if there's ever a "right time." It may take me 2yrs to get a job! Gah, I'm rambling!
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I have serious baby fever. Have had it for the last year or so. All of my friends already have babies though, so no pregnancies around me (well my cousin but she lives in a different state so I don't see her every week LOL). We just aren't in a comfortable spot financially right now. And we're getting married in December. And I feel like I'm rambling too LOL
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Yeah. I want a baby right now and I feel like a bad person when I feel any jealousy around my pregnant friends or friends who just gave birth.
I'm trying really hard to look at the perks of not TTC and waiting a year but sometimes it's really hard.
It is harder to bond with some of my pregnant or mommy friends because of my jealousy and I feel bad for being such a crappy friend. It's just so much harder to talk babies when you can't have babies.
Plus knowing that we were TTC for 8 months with no BFP made me a little bitter. How do I stop being that way?
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My baby fever goes into remission for long stretches, and I will be so glad we're not TTC yet. And then - BAM. It hits me and there is no reasoning with me.
We are helpless against our biological drive to continue the human race, it seems.
I know we are doing the right thing in strengthening our marriage but now I'm looking at friends who are just starting to TTC and thinking they will have babies when I try again... Shoot, they might have two kids by the then. Then friends who are getting married now and I think they will probably have babies. I feel like everyone is swimming forward in life and I'm treading water. 
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