would you let her?
ugh. so i have twins and it's definitely hard. my MIL keeps mentioning that she'll take one of the babies at night. HELL TO THE NO! i don't know why i'm SO against it, but i am. and i keep telling her to stop saying it, even in jest. ugh. just wondering if it's just me lol. why am i so against it? i don't know.
47 votes
GOLD / wonderful coffee bean / 18478 posts
No way! Maybe only if I was really sick and DH wasn't home or something. Not under any normal circumstance.
GOLD / squash / 13464 posts
Does she mean regularly or as a one time thing to give you a break? I would certainly never have my mom regularly take my baby overnight. But if hubs and I were exhausted and needed a break and my mom offered to have the baby sleep over for a night so we could rest I dont see anything wrong with that. (assuming the baby wasn't brand new).
honeydew / 7968 posts
@MamaMoose: she means as a regular thing until they start sleeping through the night... which could take at least 6 months? but she was saying that since they were born.
GOLD / squash / 13464 posts
@tequiero21: oh then yes that would make me uncomfortable. Especially if she continually offers after you've made it clear you aren't interested. It's like she is implying you can't handle them.
blogger / pomegranate / 3300 posts
When I was pregnant with my twins my mom took my older son about once every two weeks. I was so sick with my pregnancy a rest every now and then was very welcomed. I didn't mind at all. They were about a five minute drive so if he was really fussy I could come get him easy enough.
My concern with her taking one of your babies is that if your twins are used to each other being around you might have issues with separating them at night. Mine would not fall asleep without the other.
clementine / 889 posts
Hell no! DS has never stayed with anyone else. Although now that he's older we are planning a night away without DS. But when he was younger, the first year really, there was no way. He's my baby, not my MIL's.
clementine / 889 posts
Hell no! DS has never stayed with anyone else. Although now that he's older we are planning a night away without DS. But when he was younger, the first year really, there was no way. He's my baby, not my MIL's. If you have said no, then she really needs to back off like now. That's just not cool.
cantaloupe / 6730 posts
Not when they are young. But as a toddler or older, I think it would be a fun adventure!
honeydew / 7968 posts
i agree with u ladies, when they're older, i don't mind having sleepover at grandmas. but only for special occasions (like if i want to take a vacation with the hubs for a week or so)... not an every day thing for a year sort of thing!
blogger / wonderful cherry / 21616 posts
wtf!?!
At first I was like hell yes I would love a break... then I read your subsequent post about her wanting to take a baby every night and then I'm like hell to the no!!
yeah I totally get why you are upset... and how rude and inappropriate that she keeps pestering you about it!! Just tell her if you decide you need her help, YOU will ask. ugh that would totally eek me out.
Sorry :(:(
pear / 1723 posts
My MIL offered this too! Well, she offered to take one baby back to her house to babysit while I kept one. Like when they were 2 weeks old! For some reason it seems perfectly logical when the kids are different ages, but being twins, I just can't really imagine separating them right now. Plus, I'm just not ready for them to spend time away from home without me or the hubs at 2 months.
cantaloupe / 6730 posts
@tequiero21: Your MIL wants the baby to live at her house? Seriously? I have no words. Does she think that you only need one and the other is a spare? What the hell?!? And how did you respond to that? I don't think I would have been able to keep the "are you on crack?" look off my face.
honeydew / 7968 posts
@MerryC: i don't mind if she offered it once. and if i wanted it, i'd have taken her up on it. but she keeps saying this and it's so annoying!
@Grace: yeah i know. let's just say i can't hide my annoyances anymore. and the problem is, my emotions pretty much show up on my face, so i'm sure she knows i'm not kidding when i say hell no. she wanted to just take one at night and bring them back the next morning and do that every night, every other child. grrrrrr.
hostess / wonderful persimmon / 25556 posts
@tequiero21: I agree with @grace, that is really weird. Have you asked dh to tell her to stop it, you've got this? She had her chance, now it's your turn to raise your babies. She probably thinks she's trying to help but now it seems she's just being an overbearing mil. So weird. Why would you separate your twins??
clementine / 943 posts
Are you MIL and my MIL twins?? Mine does/says annoying/inappropriate things like that all the time. She's so baby grabby, it's not even funny. Mine has been acting like I had this baby just for her since I got pregnant.
My advice would be to let your husband deal with his mother and say, point blank, "Thanks for asking, but WE WILL LET YOU KNOW when we are ready for you to babysit". We just had to do this with my in laws, because they kept insisting on coming over "So we could get out of the house and go out to dinner". Um, hes 5 weeks old, and we have been taking him everywhere with us since day one soooo NO, you cannot come over and babysit and have our baby all to yourselves.
My MIL likes to ask if I can "handle" certain activities all the time. It's annoying, it's like she thinks I can't handle having a baby and real life too.
pomelo / 5321 posts
No way!
I don't like my monster in law anyway, so this is a definite no. She visited us before we moved and kept offering to watch DS over and over. She was so pissed that we wouldn't go out and leave her with the baby.
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