Hellobee Boards

I think after I had the MateniT21 results and the NT scan and everything came back looking good I finally started to just relax. Of course I then got diagnosed with GD really early and had some pregnancy complications.

But after a while of being pregnant the IF and the chemical pregnancy faded from my mind. Tomorrow we have my son's first birthday and IF is not really something I give much thought to these days. In the back of my mind I know that several months from now I will need to go back to the RE to try for baby #2, but that's a problem for a different day.

I was on Lovenox for pregnancy, so it wasn't until after he was born that I felt normal.

Now that I have E, I feel like all the crap, even the losses, are ok because she's who i have now. And I would go through it ten more times to have her. She sort of just fixed me

As far as it not being a part of me, sometimes I feel fraudulent for commenting on IF boards, having distinctly "graduated", with #2 on the way. But I'm always aware of the potential for problems, the fact I have to treat my endometriosis carefully and stay on the pills...take my special vitamins twice a day, always remember to pack aspirin....

I think it never truly goes away, IF leads you down a road of many emotions and down hill slopes! What I will say is I find that I convert that anxiety/doubt that IF has left in my brain into prayers/Love, I feel that maybe some little things about pregnancy I might not have payed so much attention to, after nut dealing with IF, it def makes you love/value every second!

Lots of prayers/Love to you@

@FliegepilzHut: It is scary!!!! Trust your self your body and the process!!!!!! Prayers

@FliegepilzHut: I don't know your beliefs, but I had a friend send me a verse from a book...
It said if you need medicine take it
Need a doctor.....go
Need interventions?...get help
But never forget the reason all those things are there is the same power that loves you and is in your side....def helped me!!!!!!!!

I wasn't sure I would ever feel normal, but after having my twins and a surprise lo, I feel pretty normal...I do think of my twins as a silent reminder, since I had them via treatment, but, overall, I feel a bit removed. I do sympathize with people going thru it and I absolutely love hearing success stories, but my journey per se feels like another lifetime ago.

@FliegepilzHut: You will!
@momazon: Thank you:)