Tonight I took my kids to an elementary school fundraiser at a local restaurant. I finally got a table and sat down to question my life choices amid the chaos of the successful fundraiser. As I sat there I realized my 4yo was playing with his penis under the table.

Me: "Stop playing with your penis."
4yo, extremely genuinely: "Mom, I'm not."
Me: Oh, sorry.
....
continue the long wait for food
....
4yo: "Wait, what did you say?"
Me: "Stop playing with your penis?"
4yo: Oh yeah, I'm doing that.