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Sorry you're feeling so stressed about this. It was definitely something I worried about with my ex-fi since our earning potential was more equal. Luckily now my hubby makes much more than me, and so it's made my ability to stay home feasible.

My advice would be to not stress too much now, since you're still 2 years away from TTC. A lot can change in 2 years. You could also take some action over the next 2 years to save a larger portion of your income, if possible, so that those savings might make it more possible for you to stay home? And look at your bills and expenses and see where you might be able to cut back, temporarily or long term to free up an extra hundred bucks or two per month. Sometimes thinking of 'do i want cable, or do i want to stay home with my kids' can make decisions a little easier. That said, maybe you're already living frugally!

I'm not sure where you live, or what your bills are like, but I think if it's a priority to stay home with your kids, a 6 figure-ish salary isn't necessary. My husband doesn't make that, and we'll be just fine, without being crazy frugal. Yes, we'll have to be more mindful of money than when we're both working, but I won't be on Extreme Couponing either

i'm with the ladies above. i don't really think you can count on your man's income increasing drastically, but you can do things to try and start saving now. and no matter how tight things are, you'll find ways to get around it.

We saved a lot on low incomes. We're fortunate that our families are in good spots so if they go down to the beach they're happy to have us come along, so we have perks and vacations on our low income. The thing is we're not always going to have such low incomes, I'm not always going to work so little and he's going to be finished his education and get more than a minimal stipend at some point. Our big things were to establish a savings before kids. We have over a years salary in savings still after me not working much this past year (so it took several years to get to that point and it's made us live frugally) and we won't go in debt. But you don't need 6 figures to be a SAHM. And you might be able to start getting yourself on a path where you can work from home a bit. I do some work from home while watching baby and when I have to go in, it's at a time my husband can watch her. So we never pay any daycare. There's ways to get around the system to an extent.

I am a very young SAHM and DH is young as well. Neither of us have been to college but he makes pretty good money. We definitely aren't rich and we don't have a whole lot of extra money but we definitely do just fine. I think it is just a matter of adjusting your life style.

Honestly I would say DO NOT WORRY. So much can happen in two years. You might actually be WORSE off financially in two years. Rob Sr. and I decided to start TTC at the worst possible time-- his income did not increase and I lost my job at the beginning of the 2007 recession and could not find another one. While we were pregnant and while RJ was an infant, we found ways to make it work. We moved further from a city and paid LESS for a much bigger place, we only had one car, we reduced our cable, internet, and cell phone plans... there were times when we had to rely on credit cards so we did build up debt, but we are aggressively paying it off now that we're in a better situation.

Another thing to consider is that when you're a SAHM and you have a small child, you spend a LOT less money. Yes, you have to buy diapers and formula and all that stuff, but you don't really shop for clothing for yourself anymore... or shoes... or makeup... and you definitely don't go out as much. We still lived on takeout and we STILL saved money (no drinks, no tip, no dessert, no valet...) Having a baby really changes your perspective and you definitely won't spend as much money on yourself as you used to. For instance, I used to buy myself a new purse every few months. Now I'm consigning a lot of them, gave a ton to charity, and even though I've WANTED a new purse for a while, it's been over a year since I actually purchased one.

When RJ got older and we wanted to stop building up credit card debt, we both got part time jobs. Rob Sr. was tutoring 3 high school kids and I went up to 3 part time jobs (bridal store, online ad sales, admin jobs for a friend's small business) and we were both working day and night when I finally decided to look for daycare and a full time job again. Once we secured both, we were both able to drop all of our part-time gigs, and nights and weekends were finally for quality time again. And everything worked out great. We were in the hole for a bit, and there were definitely scary moments, but I wouldn't change a thing about the way we did it.

Don't let money worries get in the way of your dreams for your family... do what's best for you guys and figure out the money as you go. There's always ways to make more money, and you don't want to look back in 10 years and regret not having a baby when you wanted to just because you were short a few thousand bucks a year.

I am a SAHM and we did a few things to help us prepare. First, we made a monthly budget and we update it every month with our actual spend. It helps us to see where our money goes and we change the categories as needed. We have line items for things like gifts we want to give, baby items, household items, etc. It's quite long, but it works for us.
Second, we scaled back our expenses. We usually did one expensive vacation a year, but we cut that out for the time being. That money allocation goes into our son's savings account.
Third, we didn't go overboard on baby stuff. We still made some mistakes and could have done it even more frugally if we didn't fall into some of the common traps with baby gear. I don't buy used clothing in general and don't for our son, but what I do buy is on sale and I am very careful not to overbuy, especially for future sizes.
Good luck!

@MsMamaBear: I'm a couponer too!!! We just installed shelves in our guest bathroom for my personal care stockpile... woohooo!!!!

I can't tell you what you should do; but I can tell you that my Mom stayed home with me despite the fact my Dad made very little money on his own (by today's standards especially). They raised 2 kids in a frugal lifestyle. We didn't "go on vacation" or have fancy toys and things. But we always had everything we needed and they played with me and loved me. I have such fond memories of my childhood. You can live in a smaller home, live simply but nicely, and feel such happiness and fulfillment. It all comes down to your priorities, your hopes, and your dreams. If you know what is your first, second, and third priorities are, then you can focus on having those things...the key to happiness! The rest is just extras, and if they don't matter that much to you, you won't miss them. If having more money to do more things/have more things matters to you, then I'd wait a few more years to get debts paid off, more financial stability, an 8 month salary saved up, etc. and see where you are at. You don't want to add stress to your life if you are cash-poor and unable to do the things you really want.

I am 24 & my husband is 25 & I am now a SAHM. One thing we did that was very helpful is used my money only as savings/investments & for must have baby items (most we got as gifts or from our parents) & living off of only his paycheck (all bills, food, dining out, activities, etc) to get used to it. Good luck