Is the term "Breast is best" offensive? I was just reading from one of the other posts and it reminded me of previous posts. Is is offensive to say "breast is best"? Even though this is a fact rather than an opinion? I have formula fed my baby when I struggled with breastfeeding, although I breastfeed mostly now, I still supplement with formual and even if I quit breastfeeding I would still accept that breast is best. Why is the term offensive if it is true
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I don't think it's offensive. You're absolutely right that breast is best. And that doesn't mean formula is evil, it's just second best.
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It's not so offensive as it is annoying.
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I don't think it's always true...breast ISN"T best if breastfeeding is causing extreme stress or unhappiness on the part of the mom. It's not just about the nutritional aspect (in that sense, I do think breastmilk is better than formula, but only because it's made by mom for baby, and I don't think formula is a bad choice)--mom's mental state is just as important. The BEST thing is for baby to be fed and for mom to be happy.
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I'd say absolutely not.
It is a fact...nothing is wrong with formula at all...but it is a medical fact that breast IS best.... -
I think the only time it's offensive is when people use it to shove down women's throats who are having a difficult time with breastfeeding.
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@hilsy85: I agree with this completely.
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It's not a fact. Breast is NOT always best for every mom and every baby.
It's not necessarily offensive, but it's hurtful and condescending.
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@.twist.: THIS. A pediatrician looked at me like I had five heads when I told her that I now feed my son formula after struggling with supply issues. Bitchy of her, yes, but I was amused nevertheless.
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@.twist.: +1
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I actually am not convinced that it's true. This article really got me thinking:
In any case, even if it was true... in my opinion there are far too many caveats to that saying for the three words to capture all the nuances. It implies that "breast[feeding] is best [100% of the time.".
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@.twist.: SO TRUE. Anything is offensive when the person behind it means it to be! Some people can say the nicest things in the bitchiest ways
& with bad intent.
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I've never really liked it, but that's because to me it implies that breastfeeding is better than what is "normal" when in fact, by design, it is the standard. I know that I'm the minority in today's society on that one though because we've been so conditioned to think otherwise, like breastmilk is over & above instead of original design.
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No, I don't think it's offensive.
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@calsmom: Seriously, that makes me sick. I had a cousin who couldn't produce enough supply to feed her daughter, the lactation nurse told her she was going to ruin her daughters health. Like... uh... REALLY???
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@zippylef: +1 to you too! I agree that it can be totally hurtful and condescending as well.
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@zippylef: As someone whose supply was ruined by a triple course of antibiotics (yay retained placenta
) and really had no choice in becoming an exclusive FF'er I totally agree with this. I could've killed myself trying to fix my supply, but I would've been useless to my daughter so I can't really see how that's "best".
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I don't think it's true 100% of the time so I don't say it.
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I don't find it offensive at all.
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@.twist.: +1.
its not so much the statement itself, its the way its used.
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I think it's offensive, because it implies that women who can't/aren't breastfeeding aren't doing the best for their baby. And I also don't think it's true 100% of the time. I wouldn't ever use the phrase. I don't even have LO yet and it ruffles my feathers.
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@JessicaMcB: I had the EXACT same thing. I had retained tissue and a massive infection when C was 2 weeks old. My milk, quite literally, never came in. She dropped over a pound in the first 4 days of life.
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@.twist.: Did she slap or laugh at the consultant? Close-minded people never cease to amuse me.
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@zippylef: Ugh, I'm sorry you went through the same nightmare! The doctors let me walk around with retained bits for about a month (I was so sick and riddled with infection it wasn't even funny), so Emma got a month's worth of EBFing before having to make the switch. I get so mad when people get judgey about it because it seems like they'd rather I have died of cepsis or something rather than stop breastfeeding.
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I'm not easily offended, so I don't find it particularly offensive, but like others have said I don't think it's a useful or appropriate saying in most cases.
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I agree with @hilsy85 100%! I also think that @ladyfingers has a good point - it does imply that women who don't breastfeed aren't doing what's best for their baby, which is offensive.
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@calsmom: I'm not sure, honestly, between hormones and new baby I think she probably just cried. Which is so sad.
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I really dont get that logic because there are other things that are "best" for my baby that we either cant afford or are not able to do for one reason or another. such as the best daycare, best clothing, best gear... so I dont know why we cant admit something is the best unless we are able to do it.
My LO is currently in daycare its not the absolute best one in our area, but it will do because it works for us, and we cant afford the nicest one, I dont feel like less of a mom by admitting this. -
@Mrsbells: I guess I don't know many people who give moms a hard time about strollers & daycares.
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@Mrsbells: In my opinion that's like saying to someone overweight, "Well thin is best you know, because it's better for your health not to carry excess weight.". Generally totally true, but still incredibly offensive because even if it is within the realm of your control no one really has the right to say something like that to you because it's none of their damn business how you choose to conduct yourself. Just how I see it though I guess.
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I agree @calsmom: It's very annoying.
Whether it's medically impossible to BF or it's a choice it's not anyone's business and throwing around that statement seems hurtful.
I can't BF because of issues I've had during all my deliveries and this one won't be any different. I also am not really that interested in doing so. I don't feel bad about that. It's my choice. My children are extremely bright and well rounded and healthy and they've been formula fed since day one.
It's not always best. -
I agree with PPs. I think it could be offensive to people if it's said in a condescending way.
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I think it is best, but that doesn't mean it's best for everyone. Nutritionally, yes. But for one reason or another breastfeeding isn't always possibly, and formula is second best.
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@banana: I agree with you!
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I think it's just bad when people use it as a condescending way.
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@hilsy85: Completely agree with you.
The thing is, not only do I not necessarily think that "breast is best," I think anytime you say anything having to do with parenting is "best," it is potentially offensive. Not much about parenting is black and white (other than the obvious, like not abusing your children) and I hesitate to make any sort of blanket statement like this one. You never know what someone's individual situation is -- what about women who are physically not able to breastfeed? Why ever say "breast is best" when for all you know you're saying it around someone who cannot do it for medical reasons and it will just hurt them? I just don't think it makes sense to ever say this, if you care about not being hurtful.
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@hilsy85: Well said!
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I can see how it could hurt someones feelings and completely agree that it doesn't take into account a lot of factors about the mothers situation. But I think it's a short concise phrase that helped people know breastfeeding isn't bad like a lot of older generations thought.
@mrbee: Even that article agrees breast is best
. The majority of that article isn't even about breastfeeding research, and the small portion that is a very diluted. The AAP responded to the article:
"In the article, “The Case Against Breast-Feeding” by Hanna Rosin, the author skims the literature and has omitted many recent statements including the 2005 statement of the American Academy of Pediatrics which supports the value of breastfeeding for most infants. This policy references every statement with
scientific evidence from over 200 articles which meet scientific standards for accuracy and rigor. The statement was meticulously reviewed by the Section on Breastfeeding, the Committee on Nutrition and numerous other committees and approved by the Board of Directors of the Academy. Breastfeeding and Maternal and Infant Health Outcomes in Developed Countries, a study released by the Agency for Healthcare Research and Quality (the AHRQ Report) strongly supports the evidence of benefits demonstrated in the breastfeeding research. The evidence for the value of breastfeeding is scientific, it is strong, and it is
continually being reaffirmed by new research work.
The American Academy of Pediatrics encourages women to make an informed decision about feeding their infants based on scientifically established information from credible resources.
David T. Tayloe, Jr., MD, FAAP
President
American Academy of Pediatrics" -
"Even that article agrees breast is best
."@Maysprout: was that quote you mentioned in the article?
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@Maysprout: You have to take into account the physical AND mental/emotional effects of BFing vs FFing before you make a statement like that, not just the nutritional value. You can harp all day long on the nutritional value but when someone is physically or emotionally unable to breastfeed, breast is very simply not best.
& with bad intent.
) and really had no choice in becoming an exclusive FF'er I totally agree with this. I could've killed myself trying to fix my supply, but I would've been useless to my daughter so I can't really see how that's "best".
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