Do I panic now? 
. Gives me a renewed feeling of hope and excitement that is much needed!
This thread has been closed by the original poster.
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@jaguar: I put no value in psychics! You shouldn't either! Let us know when you get back more fantastic bloodwork
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@jaguar: oh just saw your other comment. The embryo looks good otherwise. My RE said it looks fantastic but there's no way to know until we get it pgd'ed. And looking fantastic doesn't mean it is fantastic. If he said it looked of poor quality I wouldn't bother I don't think. I'll see if they can give me the actual grading, now I'm curious.
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@SweetiePie: Yeah, they DEFINITELY wouldn't have bothered keeping it if it didn't 'look' good - but I get it, the best looking embryos don't have guarantees. x
I went before we had a positive, but the reading only came back today, so yeah, I guess I didn't really need that adding to my already sky-high anxiety, huh?
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@Aqualov: Thinking of you!
@dookie32: Yay for such a strong first beta. FX for some great doubling. Like others have said, betas are only somewhat predictive. I had a high first beta at 11dp5dt (550.5). It doubled-and-a-half two days later so I had twins on the mind for sure. (In my case, I was psyched at the possibility because we are older, have no kids currently and this is it!) Anyway, I had my first u/s today at 7w+ and we have just one baby in there. I was so sure it was two so it took some time to get my head around this reality, but I know it must be the right thing for us and I just feel grateful. So many great things about singletons, especially being AMA... Anyway, just thought I'd share a perspective from the other side. I'm sure whatever happens will work out to be the right thing for you!
Congrats again! @SweetiePie: What a fascinating little embie you have! I can understand wanting to have it RE-PGD/S'd. Amazing that it's even possible! Good luck and many blessings, little embie!
I think your rationale for wanting to go through IVF again (maybe just FET, maybe another fresh cycle) and having no regrets makes total sense. Only IVF-ers/IF survivors can really grasp our kind of radical emotional decision-making, right? It's bonkers, but I had the same thought today after learning we are pregnant with a singleton. So to have a sibling, and assuming all goes well with this current pregnancy, I'd need to do IVF all over again at age 41/42 when the odds are totally the crappiest, egg quality is low and all the scary risks that come after that! This is not to discredit those who make that choice but my own current emotional logic on that is it won't happen because I won't put myself through that. We all have our own formula for what makes sense. Instincts are everything! Wishing you so much luck! 
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Progesterone dropped from 38 to 28. They want me to add another pessary. Clinic said it fluctuates but this can't be good.
Do I panic now? Hcg rose to 3896. Doubling time slowing down too.
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@jaguar: progesterone does vary. And, from what my doctors told me, it is very hard to get an accurate reading when doing the pessary. As for the hcg, it is still well within the normal range for doubling. Try not to worry.
Eta- I think "they" say once your beta is over 1000 doubling time naturally slows down.
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@jaguar: I agree with @beloved, the doubling time slows naturally, that's a great #.
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@jaguar: Thritto! Doubling time slows down after a certain amount (I forget what). Don't panic!
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@jaguar: no panic allowed. Those numbers are great!
@Amorini: glad your ultrasound went well!
Ivf pharmacy is out of ganirelix, so I had to order cetrotide (my doc had said either one), but that only comes in boxes of seven. It only cost $120 more, and if I bought in the US, I'd pay the same for three fewer doses. I'm waiting to hear back on the growth hormone and when my appointments will be. I hate all the waiting.
DH and I had a good conversation last night. I'm worried I will need IVIG, which is $6000-10,000/treatment for 2-3 treatments. DH said that if we need that and can't get insurance to cover it, then it probably makes sense to look at a surrogate at that point because the cost is close at that point. I looked into it, and it's expensive but isn't all of this? In fact, a lot of the costs are IVF, or medical costs during pregnancy, which we'd end up paying anyway. The other thing is once we have embryos in the freezer, the clock stops and we have time to save up for a surrogate. I hope it's not the route we need to go, but realizing that is a viable option took some pressure off.
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@jaguar: Wow! Those beta numbers are great! My doctor doesn't even take them after the number hits 1,000. I think that I read that doubling times start to slow down at some point. As for progesterone dropping. It didn't drop that much. And I found progesterone to be very sensitive. If I didn't take it at the exact same time prior to my blood test, then the progesterone number fluctuated by about 10 points. And I was doing twice daily injections. Progesterone is needed that often because of how quick it goes through your system. So really, don't be concerned about the number. My advice, really, is to quit asking about it. When is your ultrasound!?!? You will surely see something with a beta in the 3,000s!
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So we had a second opinion with a local doc this am. Bottom line--she is not willing to use the embryo we have frozen, but has high hopes for us doing a fresh cycle. What would you do??
We can transfer remaining embryo with current doc (who is out of ideas for us because everything 'looks perfect') and see what happens before switching over (so FET this spring, potential new fresh cycle late summer/early fall) OR we keep it on ice and just go forward with new doc this spring.
UGH -
I'm spotting this morning, you guys.
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@jaguar: I started spotting early on and its continued to this day! So try not to worry too much!
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@agold: I think it's the spotting COMBINED with the progesterone dropping, that is freaking me out.
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@jaguar: holding you in my thoughts, jaguar. I know a ton of people who have had spotting early on and gone on to have completely normal pregnancies and hoping that's the case for you, too!
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@jaguar: Can you think back if you took the progesterone at a different time before your blood draw?
So when I was 5w5d, I started brown/pink spotting. Then at 6w3d I had cramping plus a dumping out of red blood. I cried miscarriage all over HB at like midnight that night. I didn't take my progesterone the next morning before I went for my appointment. Baby was fine and my progesterone had dropped like 10 points. Nurse told me it was likely becuase I didn't take my shot prior to my appointment like I had done all the previous appointments. And still... no good explanation for the cramping, bleeding, spotting, clotting I've continued to have. So I really hope you are just fine. can you call your doctor's office and get in ASAP?
ETA: Some know-it-all friends I have have told me "bleeding is common with IVF pregnancies." I don't know if its true, but more than one person has told me that.
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@agold: Same time as normal re: progesterone pessaries.
I am so freaking scared. Clinic says don't worry, OB hasn't returned my call (it's only 9.30am now... gah) & GP said it's too early to do anything but take progesterone and wait.
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@jaguar: But its not too early to have an ultrasound. At 3,000+ blood test, you would be able to see a gestational sac and maybe even a yolk sac.
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@jaguar: Oh no! How bad is the spotting? Have you ever had that happen before? I know that the progesterone often does cause irritation, so hopefully that's it! I am really sorry this can't just be straightforward and easy for you. Sending a lot of hugs and hope! Your betas really do seem great!!
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@agold: Clinic says no point in u/s. I was hoping for OB to ring but he could be busy/delivering bebes/etc, so haven't heard yet.
@GreenThumb: Never! I've been pregnant 5 times now and on heavy pessaries each time and never spotted. Freaking out!
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@jaguar: Oh crap. That would make anyone of us freak. Hoping it's just light spotting and nothing more. No cramps, right? I had one day of some very light brown spotting around 2 weeks back where you are now. It was no big deal and went away. I saw bright red after pushing in the Crinone too far, but that was just my cervix yelling at me. Hoping it just disappears and you can rest easy.
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@jaguar: I hate this for you! I'm sorry! I have everything crossed for you that this is just nothing at all!!
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@Amorini: It was more when I wiped, nothing on pants or anything. And when I inserted the crinone this morning, the stick was all goopy and covered
This freaking sucks.
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@jaguar: I'm keeping you in my prayers!
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@jaguar: Was it red goop when you pulled out the applicator? Or brown goop? After I saw the red on the applicator, I had a little salmon-pink when I wiped, too, for the next few pees. I am hoping it is just your cervix being cranky about the crinone and nothing more. I'm on 2x a day .. and so you are going in there even more than me... Anyway, that was Monday and I saw the bean and hb that day. Nothing more since then so I'm pushing it out of my head (and not pushing in the crinone so far! ouch.).
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@jaguar: thinking of you and sending as much positivity your way as possible!!! I wish I had advice, but I know nothing about this.
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i can't stop undie checking!
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@jaguar: Just want to share a positive story with you. I had two instances of goopy brown spotting when I was 5-6 weeks. I totally panicked. My doctor said that the insertion of the progesterone can contribute to irritation. I'm now 10 weeks 4 days. Sending you all the good wishes!!!
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@mrsjd: I hope that's all it is. Thanks hun!
OB going to get me in on Friday for early scan, I'll be 5w6d, so not expecting to see anything.. but a blob on a screen would at least reassure me there's something there.
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@jaguar: thinking of you and hoping it's just irritation. I know you are scared, but so happy to hear you can go in for a scan in a few days
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@endymion4: I think we had chatted before about immune issues. What has been checked? FYI I'm getting a phone consult with a reproductive immunologist next week, and can let you know how it goes. I'd heavily lean towards transfer since stim cycles are so rough, but I would check out the immune issues first.
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@jaguar: sending prayers your way. Your numbers are great!
I'm trying to get growth hormone and it's one obstacle after another. I meet the qualifications of a discount program, but they are so slow and making me jump through so many hoops, that I might need to order from Avella, which is $900 more. I called the place that Waitingforyou got hers, and their price jumped $50/vial in the past few weeks. I'm also waiting for the schedule so I can get my appointments. I'm hoping I get to be in the later group since it would be easier for both of our work schedules and give me an extra day to get the HGH sorted out.
I have the phone consultation with RI one week from today. We have to miss a dinner thing we wanted to go to, but I want to get this ball rolling. After the appointment, he orders labs which I have to send there, then about three weeks later we get results and a plan. I have a good idea what it will be, but I don't want to miss anything.
We got a transfer report in the mail today from our failed transfer. It listed both embryos as "fair" despite him calling them great several times, and that one of them looked better than any other day 3 embryo. They're probably just super picky, but it adds salt to the wound.
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@AmeliaBedilia: My allergist ran a whole immune panel before we started all of this IVF stuff (almost a year ago)--everything came back normal. We believe i have some sort of auto immune issues because of some symptoms i have that are only helped by steroids and come raging back as soon as I stop taking them, but I have not tested positive for anything.
Both my current RE and the 2nd opinion are completely disinterested in discussing anything immune related given all of this. 2nd opinion said that she'd probably do heparin for me so need to talk to current RE about that to see if that's something we should add for the next transfer. At this point I think she'll add anything we ask her to because she's out of ideas (she also gave me an rx for Metformin because we asked her about this after discussing it here). I hate feeling like I'm the one driving the bus, but that's where we're at with her. I like that the 2nd opinion seemed like she was actually leading things.
We did briefly discuss going somewhere that puts more stock in immune issues, but with a 3 year old, hubby with crazy hours, and no one to help, I don't think it's going to work logistically.
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@jaguar: Just checking on you and sending positive thoughts! Hope things are going a little better for you today.
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@jaguar: Checking in too to see how you are doing..
T minus 11 days until my baseline ultrasound! The last of my meds get delivered tomorrow and through another fertility board/support group, I was able to get approx $2K in donated meds on Saturday. Add that to approx $1K in meds from another friend and I'm feeling so much better this cycle. I cannot wait to get this party started, although, am super nervous about my work load (midst of tax/busy season), driving 2.5 hours each way to appointments, etc.
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@NorthStar: That is so exciting and amazing about the meds! Hopefully things will line up with your work and cycle so that it is smooth sailing! I'm looking forward to new cycles starting up again on here
. Gives me a renewed feeling of hope and excitement that is much needed!@jaguar: Hoping all is looking up today!
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@waiting4you: Spotting settled, just nerves now.
Thanks guys, for putting up with me. I always thought it would be better to actually GET pregnant.. but now that I apparently have issues STAYING pregnant, the anxiety is mental.
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@NorthStar: YAY! So excited for you and that's awesome you were able to get so many meds. I hope the (somewhat) mild winter continues so you don't have too many travel issues.
@jaguar: I've been through 3 losses and any type of spotting would scare the crap out of me. I think it's totally normal anxiety considering what you've been through. I already decided last week that I was going to make an appt with a therapist whether my test was positive or not (my clinic has people on staff who specialize in infertility). I really feel like I need some advice on how to handle this type of anxiety so I'm not a complete mess for 9 months. It really is something that not a lot of people can understand.
2nd beta came back today- 999 :). More than double so I'm happy. With my last 2 MCs that were blighted ovums my first sets of numbers rose a lot but didn't exactly double so I feel optimistic we can at least rule that out. My 1st US will be next Wed.
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@endymion4: check out Reproductive
Immunology associates. They will do a phone consultation, then order labs which you send to them. Cost is relatively reasonable and I was able to get an appointment for 8 days after I completed the paperwork. There are only about twelve RIs in the country, so they're usually used to working with people from a distance. He will give recommendations to your RE, who sounds like they would cooperate. Worth a shot! -
@dookie32: I actually see my therapist tomorrow, thank god! =D She is going to be shocked to hear how much has changed - last time I saw her was before the transfer went ahead.
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