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At this point I would get her and then wait until she shows drowsy signs on her own again. Probably in an hour or so. We are in the same predicament as far as nighttime sleep although he naps well. We are trying to avoid CIO as well, but we are starting to get desperate. LO is almost 5 months and this has been going on since 3.5 months.

This seems really early to nap train. How is her nighttime sleep?

@Silva: Honestly, you're not likely to have good results with nap training until her nighttime sleep improves.

@Silva: Both if you can! I know it's so hard...and you're just doing what's best for your LO...

You said you cosleep right now. When LO wakes, how does she go back down? Do you nurse back to sleep? Does she go down before you and DH, or do you all go to sleep together? If you can try to get her to go down on her own first, that might improve wake ups in the middle of the night. If she does wake up, she might be able to put herself back to sleep.

We didn't cosleep, so it's hard for me to give advice on that front, but when LO would wake up, we would wait a little longer each time to go in to soothe him at night until he was STTN on his own.

@Silva: It is super important that you are consistent with whatever approach you are taking. Even starting with LO going down in her crib for the first 5 hour stretch at night is a good start (you can then co-sleep after her wakeup). You will also need to decide how you want to deal with wakeups, and might want to discuss ahead of time how you will handle certain events (mild fussing/ tossing versus crying versus full on crying/screaming). The last thing you want to do is to try to figure out what you should do while your LO is crying (and your heart is simultaneously breaking).

@Silva: Don't be disheartened. Honestly, I agree with the others, I feel like you have to try to improve nighttime sleep first before you can tackle naps.

Can you put her to sleep a bit earlier? Maybe 7pm instead of 8.30? If you get her to go down on her own she will likely stay asleep longer. Even if tyou move her to your bed when she wakes up at night, just having that long stretch in her crib is a lifesaver!

@Silva: uggg, I was just thinking back/reading my journal from 3-4 months. It's really an awful time for sleep Don't beat yourself up about her sleep being your fault - it's not!! Some babies are naturally good sleepers, others are not, and some are in the middle. All you can do is help her build good sleep habits, while also getting as much sleep as possible for yourself! So, here are some more suggestions:

1) I am really in the wait it out camp. Baby's sleep changes so frequently and is influenced by so many -often unknown!- factors. When things seem like they're the worst, wait a few more days; it's almost sure to not be so bad.

2) If you want to move her bedtime up, do it in 10-15 minute increments over a period of time. It's easier for her to adjust to that.

3) drowsy but awake is the devils phrase! I find that my son is wide awake to asleep in 60 seconds flat. He's older now and it's getting easier for us to find that drowsy spot. Don't get discouraged, just keep looking for it

4) when you're not getting sleep it feels like the end of days. It feels like your baby is getting the short end of the stick because they can't sleep well enough. If she's happy during the day and getting within the range of total daily sleep recommended, you're doing fine!

I cried for days about how I ruined F by co sleeping and nursing and he'll never sleep well and it's all my fault, etc etc. I was miserable and so was everyone else. Finally I had to let it go. His sleep is what is, we do what we have to do to sleep, and these months/first years are so small in the scheme of things, it's not worth it to spend so much time obsessing about doing it "right". Right is what works for your family.

@Silva: I just wanted to echo the other posters who mentioned the following TRUTHS: (1) This is not your fault!!! People who have good sleepers just got lucky (and even good sleepers have bad nights); (2) Drowsy but awake . . . don't even get me started! My LO can be asleep, but the second I put her in her crib--or move toward it--she is wide awake . . . and then fall back asleep in under a minute; and (3) this is a phase and it will get better, infinitely better!

@Silva: LOL - and yeah, magic indeed! *sigh* I didn't/don't have anything to complain about either other than sleep . . . even though my LO was always over tired and needing more sleep, she has always been (for the most part) an easy going, happy, smiley baby. I am a lucky mama!

I haven't read every reply, but I feel like you and i are similar in many ways : co bed, baby wearing, wanting to be gentle...

We sorta got ds going down for naps without wearing him in a few ways : rock for a bit (we no longer do this), read a book, sing the SAME two songs before every nap, pacifier, lay on tummy (yes....I know I know), and then pat his bottom. Its fairly dark and we play white noise. We started at 6 weeks, and I basically looked for when he yawned or was droopy, lol. Now that he's 7 months, he totally knows the routine. So much so that he starts yawning as I carry him upstairs and start singing! It definitely is possible, you just probably need a bit more of a routine. Ds typically falls asleep for naps in less than 3 mins with no crying. It's great! Now...if only the magic worked at bedtime, and in his crib or PnP!