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@MrsTiz: I'm so, so sorry

I'm so sorry this is happening

I am so sorry, I know you heard it a million times but I hope you know (and I'm sure you do) that you can come here and talk any time you want and there are a million girls here to support you.

@MrsTiz: I'm so sorry, for both the outcome and that you'll have to wait.

So sorry you're going through this

So sorry you're going through this. Take care of yourself and reach out with questions or to vent if you need. There are so many posters on the boards that have gone through this, I've found it helpful to read their stories and ask questions about what to expect.

@MrsTiz: I'm so so so sorry I can't even imagine what you are going through.

@MrsTiz: we were told it was safe to try again after I got my period again.

@MrsTiz: My doctor had us wait two cycles, but I also had to deliver. My husband and I ended up waiting 3 cycles because we weren't emotionally ready after 2.

@MrsTiz: I had somewhat of a complicated situation. Went in on Tuesday for the D&C and it failed because of uterus position, decided to take some pills the next day and the dame pills also failed I finally had a sedated D&C on Thursday that was successful, per Dr this is very uncommon and has never seen this before. But I wanted you to know my full back story. I laid low on Friday and I was still really emotionally about the situation. On Saturday there was a car show in our town DH wanted to go and I needed to get out of the house, we walked maybe a few blocks, BAD idea I was so sore and in so much pain I regretted it. Just take it easy you will know when you are ready to move around.

I was back to my office job on Monday, I have to go up a flight of stairs to get to my office and that was not fun.

@MrsTiz: So so sorry..... but honestly I'd rather get the D&C over and done with if I were you. They told me there'd be lots of cramping and bleeding after but for me it was really nothing, I was fine the day after. I'm sure your sister will understand if you're not up for the party, but hopefully you'll be able to go and it will be a good distraction.

@MrsTiz: That's understandable to be nervous! For me the whole thing was pretty surreal. I mean it's all so medical and sterile and you're going through all of these emotions that aren't really being acknowledged. They say "I'm sorry for your loss....." and then as you a million questions about your medical history. I don't mean to scare or upset you.... I guess for me it helps me be less nervous if I know what I'm getting myself into so you can be a little more prepared to deal with those emotions.

I'm so sorry for your loss

@MrsTiz: That's hilarious!!! Especially the giant Oompa Loompas! Please tell me you're wearing a huge blueberry costume?!! If you do feel up to going, please post pictures!

I think Willy Wonka makes perfect sense with just one Oompa Loompa (her boyfriend) - but it would be a shame to waste that blueberry!!!!

Stay strong, we're thinking of you all over the world. xxx

It'll be best to get it over with, honestly. I had a D&C once and i felt much better that evening. It's very quick and I hope you feel better (as much as you can, anyways) once it's over.

Different doctors have different ideas on when it's ok to try again. After a D&C, mine says 3 months (because they scrape your uterus and that can do something to it, i guess?), but it varies widely.

@MrsTiz: I'm so sorry you are going though this, and I know I'm kind of late to the post, but wanted to let you know how mine went; I think having as much info as you can ahead of time about what to expect is better. I was so uninformed, and wish I had been a member of a community like this at the time.

I found out at our first appointment/ultrasound that the baby had no heartbeat and was measuring two weeks too small last December. I was supposed to be 10 weeks. My OB was fabulous and explained everything and gave my hubs and I time to talk about it. I was a complete wreck, but knew that I wanted everything over with as soon as possible. I'd had no cramping or bleeding so far so I didn't know how long it would take to happen naturally. They were able to schedule me for the next afternoon, which I was so thankful for. I had a pre-op phone call and they told me to shower with this special soap and not eat or drink after midnight. We went into the hospital around 10 am, checked in and waited for about 30 minutes in the waiting room. They took me back to pre-op by myself and got my IV hooked up and stuff. Then my husband was allowed to come back. I met with the anesthesiologist and signed some papers, then we waited. The OR where my procedure was to take place was backed up so we had to wait like an extra two hours and I had a breakdown because I just wanted it over with. Once it was finally time, they wheeled me to the room and did the whole count backwards from 100. I think the whole procedure took 10-15 minutes. My husband was allowed to see me after I woke up and I drank some juice and ate some crackers. Went to the bathroom and then we headed out. I needed some painkillers and heavy duty pads so we actually went to RiteAid after, and got pizza and a movie. I wasn't in a lot of pain, just really wore out and kind of achy.

Once we got home, I did have some weird feelings like tingling in my arms, and I called my doctor and she really reassured me, so make sure you get a number to call if you need to.

I had some cramping and heavy bleeding a few days later that was apparently pretty normal. I did pass some bigger clots, which alarmed me, but again, the doctor said this was normal. I went to a Christmas party the next day, and physically was fine. Emotionally, I didn't want to be there, but I felt ok physically.

I was back to work Tuesday (procedure was Friday). I would have gone back Monday, but came down with a bug or something on top of it all.

My biggest advice is to ask questions if you have them, don't feel bad calling your doctor after hours. There's someone on call for a reason. Its better than worrying yourself sick.

Also, take time to be sad. I was a wreck for a while, and I was okay with that. Make sure you talk to people if you need to. Don't keep it all bottled up. I did a lot of reading online and was amazed how common it is. People just don't talk about it, which is a shame, because it makes it almost taboo. It's okay to be mad, sad, whatever you feel. It's your life, your body, and your baby.

As for trying again, we waited till May because I wasn't emotionally ready. My mom died in February of 2011 and then we lost the baby in December, so it was a pretty rough year for us. I needed time to grieve. I think everyone is different, so do what you think is right. We haven't hit the jackpot yet, but I think that's because I haven't been getting my O date right.

Even though I don't know you, I'll be thinking about you tomorrow. Best of luck, and if you need any support from a complete stranger, let me know.