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I am going to try...and the minute it starts to fail: I'm done.
I took myself and my husband through HELL trying to MAKE/FORCE BFing to work. We were miserable. I was popping all sorts of lactation pills, addicted to pumping, would wake up every frikkin 2h to pump 1oz..if that.
My son was MSPI, so I had to eliminate everything from my diet too...
It was just...bad.
Everyone suffered because I spent so much time and energy, insisting that I needed to bf.
next time...eff it. My happiness and emotional stability trumps it.
Because literally, all I remember from weeks 6-12 with my newborn are smells of maple syrup (fenugreek) and the sounds if the pump at 3am...and massive feelings of failure/guilt/ "why me"

ETA: With that being said, I pray an hope that fate will have it, that breastfeeding will be smooth and easy for me next time around. Maybe I will only suffer once? Maybe I can have a blessed time BFing next time? Either way: no more guilt! My son is 8m and super healthy (been MILDLY sick, one time).

@runsyellowlites: I don't look at FF as an intervention, like all other interventions...
It's literally just another way/ choice to feed a baby? Some people choose to do it just because....
I don't think it's social looked at as an intervention. Not trying to badger you, @runsyellowlites: , I just really don't think intervention is a good way to describe FF.

@runsyellowlites: no,no I totally understand your reasoning. I think BM is #1 as well...it biologicaly is! But, like I said and you said now, many families don't look at FF as an intervention. Whether they supplement or just plain ol' choose to FF, they look at it as a totally viable option for the ones they love most: their kids! To them, it isn't an intervention. To us? Who have tried BFing and didn't succeed, yeah, it's an intervention. Even then, I hate looking at it this way.

@zippylef: annnnnnnd, I'm done threadjacking now.

i definitely am going to try. i honestly think i will be successful the next time. dh thinks i'm crazy and we should just go to ff but he doesn't understand my deep need to at least try!

@zippylef: @TurtleDoves: Yes! I prefer "food," "sustenance," "life-sustaining nectar"

I see absolutely nothing wrong or inferior with formula. I will try BFing my next, but I'm not going to put my family and myself through misery if it's not working for us. I'm a mother, not a martyr.

Didn't manage to BF with #1, but I still poured my heart into it with #2. Tried all I knew, but only EBF'd for 2.5 weeks. Now that I'm pregnant with #3, I most certainly am going to try again. I'm taking supplements now and will add more in the third tri and after birth, am going to have my placenta encapsulated. I'm literally going to use all the resources I've learned about since I quit with #2 and give it absolutely everything I've got. I plan to go whole hog like this for the first 6-8 weeks and the reevaluate. As very important I believe breast feeding to be, my older children still deserve a mother as well.

I'm sort of undecided on my second. I really like that I can pump and my husband does so many feedings. So if anything, it'll be a mix of Bf, pumped bottles, and formula at night. DH and I have already talked about how well formula at night works for us and how we'll do that again after a few weeks.

We like our FF at night. It gives us more sleep and makes us more sane parents. It's not some direly important thing to me that my kids get *only* breastmilk. Plus, it lets me leave her with a sitter or my husband and do things. I'm not keen on being attached to my children 24/7/365 because sometimes, this momma needs more than a 3 hour break or a 3 hour stretch of sleep

I wasn't able to EBF DD and it was so hard on me emotionally and physically. I knew I wanted to EBF DS but also knew that DD thrived without being EBF so if I needed to supplement/use formula it wouldn't be the end of the world.

I will try and if the next one can/will latch I will continue as long as I can, if not I will pump for 6-8 weeks like I did this time and switch to formula before going back to work. I don't want to have to pump and feed in the middle of the night when working!

I may try again, but as soon as it stops working for us, I'm going to move to pumping like I did with DS. I was so torn and beat myself up over not being able to breast feed him (mainly b/c my mom told me I wouldn't be able to and I wanted to prove her wrong), but I'm just not going to stress out about it the next time around. If I can't, then I'll pump...and once I can't pump anymore, then I'll move to formula. I also don't see formula as an intervention. I see it as food for my child.

I BF and pumped for my 1st LO for just a couple months...I had medical issues in the past, low support (even my LC was discouraging), and thus... low supply. So yes, she was primarily FF...

I was very nervous about BFing #2.

Not gonna lie, the first few days of BFing #2, I had the same issues... she also got a few bottles of formula in the hospital due to low blood sugar. I was very prepared to be going down the same route again.

But on Day #3 or 4 (at home), she latched on perfectly and we haven't stopped BFing since. I'm glad I kept at it! It's been a challenge, to say the least. BFing is not easy at all, but very rewarding. I'm glad it worked out the 2nd time.

I made it to 4 mo with DD and it was a major source of stress. But I knew what to expect the second time around and applied lessons learned to DS and I was able to EBF until 13 mo. Probably one of my life's greatest achievements to date. I also put way less pressure on myslef and that was a huge factor in my experience the 2nd time around.

@strawberry: I actually had very bad hives after my first child and I am certain it's related to bf hormones as you say. They stopped as soon as I stopped breastfeeding. It was horrible and I feel so bad about your experience as it sounds really severe! I didn't have that problem the 2nd time around though.

I wasn't able to breastfeed directly with my first. I exclusively pumped for a year and had to supplement for the first month. It was so much work, and I'm hesitant to do it again for my next LO. I will most definitely try to breastfeed with my second, but this time around I know to start pumping right away.

I'm planning on BFing our second. I feel like I am better informed this time and, since DH will be home, I'll have more support. If it doesn't work out, I hope I can accept it rather than beat myself up over it.

Referring to formula as an intervention is really offensive to me. BFing doesn't work for everyone. I think we can all agree that we want what's best for our babies and Moms get enough crap for the decisions they have to make. My child thrived even though we were only able to BF for a month. Instead of being proud of that, I beat myself up for months because BFing didn't work. Formula isn't number one biologically but it is the number one choice for a lot if families. I don't think we should have to defend ourselves over and over again.

@zippylef: oh no, hope you didn't think I was on board with the word "intervention" ! I'm not!

@Sweet T: we shouldn't [have to defend ourselves..]. I agree.

I could only produce in one breast, so that was never enough for my LO.

Next time, I'm not going to stress so much about pumping and trying to increase my supply....but will give what I am able.

I wasn't able to BF the first but never really cared one way or the other about it. My plan was to try and BF my second but since I wasn't able to with my first, I was resigned to the fact I wouldn't be able to. I was able to for 4 1/2 months and could have longer BUT my 36GG were killing my back so I stopped so they could go down in size...which they didn't.

I did supplement with formula from when DD was about 1 week old as I got food poisoning an was worried about both of us having enough nutrients

I am undecided. Honestly, although pumping sucked, it was really nice to have my husband be able to feed him in the middle of the night and to be able to run out for a couple hours by myself without having to feel guilty if my baby was hungry and needed me. The thought of having to be tied to my child for every single feeding scares me, quite honestly. I love him but I love seeing his dad bond with him while feeding him and mama needs her alone time every now and then!

Our next LO is almost gauranteed to be pre-term like Owen was and I know from experience how difficult it was to get him to breastfeed. Sure, we probably could have persevered and made it work but in the end I'm 100% satisfied with bottle feeding.