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I did this with #3 and it has been so so great. I let him try latching in the actual delivery room, but it immediately put me in such a bad place emotionally and brought back lots of bad BF memories with my first two, so once we got to the recovery room we switched to formula. I was able to enjoy him and my maternity leave 1,000 times more than I did with my first two, and my husband has been able to be an equal partner in feedings and night wake ups, which is huge since we both work full time. Lots of people mention the hassle of washing bottles, but I always had to pump in order to keep enough supply so with my other two kids was washing bottles and pump parts a ton anyway. #3 has thrived, and I just feel like taking the huge BF/EP stress out this time made adding a new baby a million times easier for our family. Good luck! I also felt lots of guilt at first but me being so much happier and saner as a mom has benefited everyone!

My best friend was planning to do exactly what you proposed for the same reasons. Her pediatrician urged her to just try breastfeeding with the caveat that she never needed to pump. If it wasn't working she could combo feed or formula feed with no worry. Her second was a natural nurser and happily nursed with zero issues. He took a formula bottle if she was out, but he was a dream baby.

#3 wasn't. He had a horrible latch, which caused supply issues, clogged ducts, and a ton of stress. She formula fed him from 3 weeks on.

Both boys are completely healthy and happy.

@DillonLion: I made a very similar post before having LO2. I just couldn't psych myself up for it. In the moment after he was born I decided to give it a try with no commitment and things just worked out so much better than LO1. Best wishes for whatever you decide.

I could have written the same thing that @HappyBaker: did. My whole postpartum experience was so much better with LO2 who was exclusively formula fed, and I'm so happy I made the decision to do it. I'm still an advocate for fed is best, regardless of how you do it, but formula feeding was undoubtedly the best solution for our family.

I had a horrible BF experience with DD. I EPed with DS only because he was in the hospital for 8 weeks and I got free meals if I was pumping. I weaned the day after he came home. That had been the plan the whole time. Zero guilt.

@DillonLion: I’d say if you don’t like it and if it gives you anxiety, don’t do it. I’d also say that my BFing experience was different between my two kids and it might be for you too. And if you wanted to try it I suggest just not pumping at all. You should not need to pump to establish your supply. Feed the baby every 2 or three hours.

Personally, I HATED making bottles in the middle of the night and never quite figured that part out. It was easier for me to just grab the baby and nurse.

But for both my kids my supply tanked around 7 months. With LO1 I kind of blamed myself and figured I had made mistakes. But then it happened again with LO2 and i figured it was more the pump and working than me. Both times I quit pumping at work and went to EFF. That’s what worked for us and I think everyone should do exactly what works for them in terms of feeding the baby. If you enjoy nursing, great. If you hate it and think bottles will save your sanity, great.

@DillonLion: My issue when I first started was that it took over a week for my milk to come in. It made nursing stressful and we were supplementing and all the time when he cried I didn’t know if he was hungry or what. With LO2 she was a cluster feeder and my supply was in after like 2 days. And she was happy and sleepy as long as she was eating or comfort nursing. And she slept great. It would’ve killed me to be making her bottles every few minutes, lol.

Just commit to doing whatever you think is easiest to get the baby fed. And to not feeling guilty!

@DillonLion: for my first, it took 5 days for my milk to come in but for my second (they are 5 years apart) it only took 2 days! It was in before I left the hospital. That made a huge difference. I didn't hate breastfeeding my first, but it wasn't fun and we only lasted until 9 months. He had been getting formula at daycare anyway because I couldn't pump enough.

My second, was a completely different story. It was so easy. We EBF until 9 months but then started sending formula to daycare because I hated pumping at work.

All this to say, do what makes you happy. Happy mom, happy baby. Everyone has different experiences and all babies are different!

I have a friend who chose this route. She had a rough experience BF her first and she has generalized anxiety anyways. She chose to not even try BF with her second and has no regrets. My son was not a great nurser, and I ended up EP after he was about 6 months old. We started supplementing with formula at 9 months. But between 6-10 months or so I spent *so* much time pumping to try to keep my supply up. In retrospect, I wish I had gone completely to formula sooner.

I did choose to nurse my second kid. But I will tell you that it was a much better experience than initially nursing my first kid. MUCH better. Good luck with whatever you choose!

Long story short, after multiple issues with BF LO1 and LO2 (and multiple food allergies in the mix that wouldve meant going wheat/ nut / egg and dairy free) I decided with number 3 I was going straight for formula from birth on. His growth, health, milestones, everything have been right on track and I was SO much happier and less stressed in the early days. Like you, I just wanted to enjoy him and cuddle without stressing about latches, jaundice, and other issues. I 100% support any mom’s choice, including not to BF at all. The nurses in the hospital were fine with it... I just said “after my previous experience this is what my husband and I have chosen”. Good luck to you as you welcome your little one!

I chose not to breastfeed at all. I luckily was at a hospital that didn't try to force bf'ing on me and didn't make me feel bad at all. I wore pads in my sports bra for awhile after my milk came in to prevent leaking. I'm also not sure if it is true, but I heard peppermint hinders supply so I ate peppermint patties like they were going out of style. I also stuffed my bra with cabbage leaves when no one was visiting.

It hurt pretty bad when I was engorged and people gave tight "congratulatory" hugs for the new baby. Other than that there were no issues. My milk came and went within a week or so.

My 2nd is 13 months old. I never put him to the breast once. Didn’t pump a drop. Zero regrets.

BF/pumping for my first caused nothing but anxiety for the entire 6 weeks till I quit. I dreaded it for my 2nd. So glad I never bothered.
I was able to focus so much more on my big boy. Got better rest. My husband was able to help more. I didn’t have to lose even more time to pumping.

13 mo is happy (like ridiculously so) and healthy and so am I.

I also want to add to those saying “maybe it’ll be different the 2nd time”....that’s not what OP asked. She even said she thinks starting then stopping will be worse than just not starting at all.
I know you’re then saying “do what makes you happy” but it’s still just a nice way of trying to convince her to try. She didn’t ask for positive BF experiences after having a negative one.
I think many of you might not have experienced the nauseating, crippling, panic-filled experience she (and many of us) have had.

@DillonLion: I already replied but wanted to add - if you are already feeling anxiety about the PROSPECT of breastfeeding, I think you already know what’s right for you. I was you almost 14 months ago. I fretted and fretted over it. And in the end a LACTATION consultant is the one who told me she didn’t think it was a good idea for me to try. I did sit down with a manual pump once (as even the sound of an electric pump made my heart race) and after two squeezes of the handle I literally felt a wave of nausea at the feeling of my nipple being pulled. I got rid of the manual pump, gave away my free one from insurance. Never looked back. Zero regrets.

I didnt (although I did a bit, just what I felt like and I ended up having to pump) for my third. But my second, just colostrum. No regrets. I also talked this over with doctors as I had medical stuff going on at the time. I refused to take shit from anyone about it, too. We live in a pretty pro-bf area and I got a few comments but I had learned to stand my ground after lo1. I'm not the sassy know it all kind of mom but I refused to let people lecture me or put me down for it the second time!!

@SweetiePie: thank you for saying this. I halfheartedly attempted nursing my second despite having similar feelings/issues to the OP, and I honestly did it to appease well-meaning friends and family members who kept offering "helpful" suggestions and encouragement.

Nursing is NOT a great experience for many women and it would be nice if others could just let that truth be what it is. It's f-ed up, but my kids are 4 and 7 and I still feel bad for not nursing them. It really shouldn't be that way.

OP, good luck with your new baby and do what is best for you. A happy mom and bonded baby are so much more important than exclusively bf.

I'm OAD, but the only way I would have #2 is FF from the beginning. If ANYTHING, I would BF in the hospital for the colostrum, but nothing more than that. I had an awful time breastfeeding and it caused awful PPA.