Hellobee Boards

Japan?! I would absolutely do it! My husband has had expat jobs for most of his career and we left the US almost 5 years ago. We've been living in Austria for almost 4 years now but we will definitely leave for a new (yet to be determined) destination in the next 3 years. We arrived right before our older LO turned 2 and he's trilingual at this point. Our younger LO was born here and it's the only home she knows. My husband and I are both completely fine with the expat lifestyle, but there are definitely inconveniences and it isn't for everyone. Some things I would consider:

If you own your home, what will you do with it while you are gone? Will your DH's job pay relocation costs? How are you insured? Are you paid in local currency or USD (and if it's in USD, do they adjust for currency fluctuations?). Do they help you find housing? Does the company pay any education/daycare expenses? Will you (as a trailing spouse) be legally allowed to work?

Yes! Every year we have to let DHs company where we would be willing to move temporarily and permanently.

@DisneyBee: Well, my dad was teaching on an army base, so we went to school there and weren't in the Dutch school system. We came back to Canada in grade 5 and it was a bit difficult but I'd stayed in contact (through letters! The olden days!) with some of my friends so that helped.

What an amazing opportunity but I completely understand the hesitation. I work in international education and have always wanted to live overseas again (only did for a year in college, never professionally) and this is something my husband and I talk about frequently. My husband was raised overseas and originally was not interested in picking up and relocating (his memories of relocating as a child were not great), even if just for a temporary time frame, but he seems to be coming around to this a bit now. His company has many opportunities available internationally and when he started his position, we talked about this as a possibility.

I feel like a temporary move to a new location (especially one in which the language and culture is different) is so valuable for small children. I don't know if I would want to move permanently, but imagine that the experiences for children could be rich. International schools, while pricey in some locations, can be wonderful and give your children a completely different educational experience.

For Japan? I probably would. My sister has lived in Tokyo for more than 10 years, has given birth twice over there and loves living there. They do plan on moving back to the usa eventually, but they are saving up money since her job pays well over there. They love how safe it is for their boys, education for them. It used to be way more expensive to live there, but now she says the US has gotten pretty much the same for clothes and household stuff. The culture definitely took her a couple years to get used to on how they communicate differently and they're so polite to a fault that they won't tell you no. Most everyone can speak a little English and lots of Japanese love American holidays and stuff so they are becoming more Americanized.

Yes! Yes! Yes! We are actively looking for opportunities to move abroad. I'm apply to about a dozen jobs a day in various countries but it would make life so much easier if either of us could transfer within our current companies.

I'm excited about the possibility of moving abroad because:
(1) Adventure!
(2) Cultural and language exposure for the children- they are such sponges right now and I'd love to widen their horizons through living abroad.
(3) The countries we are looking at (Germany, UK, Australia, New Zealand, and some misc others) have slower paces of life. Somewhere along the way our work-life balance got jacked up and I think the children are suffering for. It's very difficult to make that changes from home though.
(4) Most other countries are less materialistic. I'd like my children to grow up with less then they have now. Again, it's difficult to make that change from home though. We could do it but they would really stand out from their peers.

I would live in Japan for a year or two or three. Love it there. Great for kids.

If I had family abroad I would love to do this!! Since you have family there I say go for it!

We're actually just making the move from the US to Belgium! I was a little apprehensive since I'm pretty comfortable here but now I'm really excited for the opportunity! It made sense for us timing wise as well as financially. We'all be sending our kids to an international school there. I think it will be a great experience for all of us.

I think you should go for it! I lived in Tokyo for five years and loved it. I agree with previous posters that it's important to find out what costs will be covered by his company as housing in the areas where most ex-pats live and international schools are not cheap in Tokyo. If both of those will be covered or subsidized, I would go for it! I actually found it pretty easy to meet friends there especially when you have kids (within the ex-pat community). You also make friends from around the world which is amazing too. You can definitely survive without learning Japanese, but life will be so much easier if you learn the basics. Your husband might not even miss driving there as the public transportation is so good. All in all I think if there's the right support, it sounds like an amazing chance for your family!

I have lived in Japan before, so I would go. Tokyo would not be my first choice of places to live there, but if that's the offer on the table, I'd take it. I would not choose an international school for elementary, I'd either homeschool or do the local schools, if possible. The local school system is fine for elementary in my opinion, but if you'll only be there a few years in preschool and early elementary, I'd homeschool.

@DisneyBee: I've also lived in Tokyo for 4 years (pre-kids), and would do it again in a heartbeat. But I agree with other posters - with children, especially children of school age, there are a lot more pieces that need to be in place and included as a part of DH's relocation package. You've gotten great advice on the right questions to ask already. Also, it's already been said, but your experience will be ten times richer if you can already speak (or are willing to learn to read and speak) Japanese. I got much further in my Japanese skills than DH did, and to this day I still think that's why my memories of Japan are much fonder than his!

@mrsbookworm: I had been wondering what you decided. Good luck with the move!

I had my daughter in Thailand and we still live here but we're probably moving back next year to be near family. The cool thing about being an expat is that everyone groups together and makes friends really easily because everyone has something in common. The downside is that everyone knows the location is temporary and that turnover gets tiring. BUT i think you'll never regret going! and you probably will somday regret not going....

Hell yes! Your kids will get so much out of it. One of the things that make me saddest is that neither of us have jobs that would allow us to take our kid abroad for a year or two.

@lamariniere: Thanks! You and the other Bees helped me to decide to go for it!

@disneybee: We're still getting everything together. We need the final details of the relo package before we go on a house hunting trip. My kids are 3 and almost 2. Luckily, my husband's company is pretty generous. They'll be paying for the kids schooling so we will be sending them to an International Baccalaureate school. Since we'll only be there for 2-3 years I thought it would be easier to keep them in a school where they are taught in English. We're going to take Dutch lessons though!

Our biggest decision now is whether to live in the city or the suburbs. I'm leaning towards the city but my husband thinks suburbs.