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We don't let our 15 month old have sweets (she had a cupcake on her birthday, but that's it), so she doesn't really even know what she's missing. Yesterday at church, a friend wanted to give her a cookie (she's a pediatric nurse, so not sure why she would do that!), and I told her we didn't give her sugar — she thought that was fantastic and I gave her a cracker to give her instead. I haven't really come up against any major pushback, but she's still young. I'm sure as she gets older, I'll get more comments.

Daycare provides organic food for the kids — no treats are showing up on the list, but we're also still in the infant room. So far, the menus have been pretty good — fruits, veggies, grains, meat, fish. Occasionally cheerios or a muffin or something, but I'm ok with that. Parents aren't allowed to bring treats in either because of allergies, so I don't have to worry about that.

@Bao: exactly! No one would ever tell you how to feed yourself so why should they judge how you feed your kid? Sadly, everyone has an opinion & will always be thinking something negative though!

Fair warning, food is a sensitive subject for me. eta: My son is 3.

For the first 18 months of my son's life, he ate absoutely the best foods available. Local milk, local fruits and vegetables, yogurt with no added coloring or flavorings, eggs from the chickens in town.

Then, all of a sudden, he began to slowly reduce the number of things that he ate, to a point where he has a list of safe foods and without going into too much detail, they're not my favorite things, BUT he is getting nutrition and he is consistent in his height and weight.

The reason why I even write this out is that there are often other sides to the story, so please be sensitive about other parents and their choices for their children. Everyone does things for a reason, whatever they are.

I am super hardcore about food. I was raised on the nastiest crap and I want my daughter to have the best nutrition possible. Luckily where I live it is a very big thing- local farms, local food, and my dh works at a local coop. They make everything as healthy as possible. I also worked at a private school and all the food was organic- the parents voted and chose!
I feel judged sometimes about being so hardcore. I am kind of an idealist in general and I had someone tell me that I was trying too hard Even if she meant well.... geeze!

@looch: Agreed. Our LO is getting to be picky — especially when sick (and she's in daycare, so we're sick every other week), so no judgment from me on what anyone feeds their kids!

@locavore_mama: I think respect is a two way street. If you're (general) giving people the side eye because they're serving their kids chicken nuggets, you're (general) not going to get respect. I think you can only "know" so much backstory on a parent and their situation and I do find it true that we are more leneient if we know the people in question, if that makes sense.

I, of course, mean you in the general sense, not you specifically.

@locavore_mama:

@Bao: Oh I totally agree with you. At least as far as HB goes, I feel like the parents feeding their kids sweets and fast food are the ones being judged.

I should be more concerned. My dad was hospitalized with a extremely bad blockage several years ago. He ate healthy, ran marathons (he actually ran the Disney marathon a couple weeks after his discharge, ugh). He has since run the marathon again, including the Goofy (where they do the 1/2, the marathon AND the 5 k in a weekend).

Several months ago, he was hospitalized again with a 99% blockage. Extremely scary. They picked it up at a routine stress test. He only turned 46 two months ago. My doctor is on me to track my own cholesterol, because they are thinking it is genetic. If his good cholesterol is high, yet he's still having issues with all his meds and exercise and diet, I may have the same issues going forward.

That doesn't stop me from getting a DiGiornio once in awhile, and I do not eat Paleo, but I am trying hard to eat more veggies and fruits.

@locavore_mama: I've had blood work done, but there is nothing else my doctor wanted done yet - I guess my levels are still okay? But, my dad's seemed to be okay too at his blood work before his stress tests. ugh.

Nope not at all. Ds has nvr had sweets but we also give him morningstar veggie patties, krn rice snacks, frozen veggies, etc, that aren't all fresh foods and I have no problem w.it.

Most everyone commends us for not having given him swts yet (he's 15 mths) and I really wouldn't care if thet judged me.or not. My kid. My rules.

@sorrycharlie: I agree w/ @locavore_mama: about getting checked! DH underwent a full cardiac work up a couple of years ago because of a few weird spells. He has a family history of many people passing away from heart attacks at a pretty young age, like in their 50s. They can also do the Berkley test which evaluates your genetics as well. We learned that genetically, DH is basically a heart attack waiting to happen (has what the doctor referred to as the "heart attack gene," which increases your chance of a heart attack by like 50% or something crazy, and has a gene that makes him more likely to have cholesterol issues). I'm so thankful we got a full work up done because they basically told us that genetics loads the gun but diet and exercise pull the trigger. So, I feel like it really drove home the point that we need to be vigilant in those areas. They decided he doesn't need to be on meds yet, but that is something that will probably happen at some point in the next decade. Anywho, point being, I highly recommend getting checked out. Better to know what you're up against and be as preventative as possible!

As to the original question posed here, mostly people have been respectful of our decisions thus far, but I suspect that after they are a year old, we'll start getting more flack. Daycare calls me the "Lunch Lady" because of the bentos I send the boys; they think I'm a little crazy, but they seem to mostly think it's a good crazy. I think our families might think we're a bit over the top with how we plan to continue feeding them, but I'm okay with them having some unhealthy food when they're visiting family, as long as they eat healthier when they're home with us. If anyone thinks we're being ridic, they can absolutely do so, but I know from DH's genetics that my kids will inherit at least some of those same genes (DH has the "heart attack" gene from both sides) and I'm doing everything I can now to give them a healthy mental view of food and teach them how to eat in a heart-friendly matter. For some people, whether their kids are eating healthy or not may not be as important, but with the backdrop we have, it feels a little more critical.

Everything in moderation for us. And no judgement here! Everyone does what they think is best for their family, not my place to think I know what the best is for anyone else.

I usually feel very supported by our friends but our families (and sometimes even DH) are a different story. My IL's eat very poorly and therefore DH grew up eating pretty unhealthy. He doesn't understand why I care about giving DS juice, sugary snacks, etc but he knows I don't want him to have those things, and he usually goes along with my wishes. We get pushback from some of our families because I don't order typical kid food for LO when we go out, or chose to give him healthier options when we are eating together. I generally just say something like "if he likes eating healthier things then why would I give him anything else?" and that usually helps.

I've always been pretty laid back about food. After all, I like sweets so who am I to eat stuff like that and not let him have any? We don't go overboard, but it's a non issue. We have a candy drawer in the kitchen and ds can help himself at appropriate times. He never is a glutton about it and lets himself have an occassional treat. He's got good self control about it.

And you know what his favorite food is? Cauliflower. The kid loves his veggies. We make it a non issue, so sweets aren't a novelty to him.

We eat healthy, too...at dinner we have lots of fresh veggies and foods and we keep fruit in the fridge that he also likes. We all eat a good variety of food...and we're all very healthy.

Everything in moderation.

@Mrs. Blue: @locavore_mama: I think he's been through the wringer with tests! I can ask if he has had genetics looked at but idk. I think they suggested childhood/early adulthood diet (like, 20-25) may have played a role as well before he started really getting into running and eating healthy. I'm not positive, I'll ask though.

I hear ya! The way I see it, is that it doesn't matter to me what you feed your child, but it IS my responsibility as a parent to be sure my child gets the nutrients he needs for life and optimal health. I am pretty picky about what my child eats and I don't apologize for it. Thankfully I come from a family who eats even healthier than I do - and they fully support it. His birthday cakes have always been gluten free and free of processed sugar. But I will admit to letting him have certain snacks on a special occasion; like I let him have some cheddar bunnies after his doctor appt because he was so well-behaved and listened well. I generally try to avoid food rewards and bribing with food - but he really loves it.

We don't eat 100% organic because of the cost, but we prioritize some organic things such as dirty dozen, meat and dairy.

At 2, he isn't a picky eater thankfully, but I understand that can change. My parents were very, "you eat what we make/serve, or you don't eat" and I think that helped me avoid being picky. I actually learned to LIKE some foods because it was served over and over. We will approach that when or if that comes up with our son. But we do try to stay open-minded and focus just on what's best for us.