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I am your DH! I hate our cats. I used to like them but I have put up with their behavioral issues, done the suggestions made by the vet, and my like grew to hatred when our daughter was born and we downsized the apartment.

We still have them and I know this is going to sound horrible but DH wants to start trying again for baby number 2 but I said not.until.those demons are gone. So, I will eventually win. I was worried about resentment but the cats are starting to annoy him, too.

This makes me sad It's hard for me to put myself in this situation because our pup was originally DH's, and when we first met it was quite obvious that the dog came first and if I didn't like him I'd go. Luckily I love him.

But I do hope that now that we're married I would come before the dog.

I was your DH at the beginning of my marriage! My DH had (has) this horrible, untrained, unfixed cat, and she would pee on all of my things and had scratched his furniture all to hell. She would hiss or bite me every time I came near her. The worst fights I had with him were over this cat. And she sounds WAY worse than yours! We both eventually *won* in that we kept her, but I made him get her fixed and she sleeps in the garage so she doesn't keep us up with her yowling.

It sucks though, that your cat is just a normally behaving cat and your DH still hates it. It's a rough situation to be in. I guess you both just need to sit down and weigh your priorities. Is it worth fighting all the time if you can have your cat? Is it worth it to your DH to get rid of the cat if he will feel guilty about it forever?

I'm sorry I don't have better advice, but I do know how much it sucks to fight over a darn cat!!

I love my husband more than anything, but if he made me give up my dog I'd kind of hate him for it. I think part of what made me fall in love with him was watching love her more and more.

@Sugar.Biscuit: It sounds like there is something else bothering your DH . . . because really, it is his behavior that is out of line.

@blackbird: I agree!

Oh no! There has to be a resolution with out getting rid of the cat. Otherwise, you're just going to resent him. I bet the cat is picking up on his demeanor and that's not helping.

But I understand about not wanting to fight with DH over a cat! Our cat was what caused all our arguments for a long time. My mom bought be a cat while I was looking for work. He kept me company during the day when I was feeling down about being unemployed. My DH is NOT a pet person, but I grew up with cats in the house. It was ok when the cat just stayed inside, because the cat was nice and clean. Well... I picked the absolute worst cat from the SPCA. I think he was a ferrell cat b/c he did not do well being cooped up in the house. He bit me in the face. I should have gotten rid of him then, but I didn't. So we started letting the cat outside and we installed cat doors. Then my DH really started to hate the cat b/c he was so dirty! And then he started spraying in our house. Then he kept getting into fights with other cats and at one point got an infection. We had to keep him inside for a month while it healed. It was a mess. Then the cat started shitting in his bed. So we finally compromised and the cat now just stays outside all the time. The cat seems to be doing better with that anyways. It was better than DH's solution of driving him somewhere and dumping him. and the cat has a microchip. Blah! Sorry for my long story. Anyways, I hope you guys can come up with a compromise.

I can say that one's feelings can definitely change towards a pet. My patience for my dog's antics has gotten waaaaaay lower since having our LO. It always annoyed me that he would bark at the doorbell, but now it pisses me off to no end because it wakes the baby. His shedding is more annoying because it gets on her stuff, I hate it when he licks her face, etc, etc. Not to mention I'm going to have to spend $3K on freaking dog ACL surgery that could be going to LO's college fund. But I got a dog and it's my responsiblity to provide a loving and caring home for him as long as he's alive. So I just wanted to say I really can see your husband's side of it.

I am sorry for the cat :(((((( I hope he/she can find a good home...

I vowed to myself before/ during I was pregnant that my love to my cat will not change. Even though it did somewhat (My cat got demoted from being my baby to just a pet since LO was born), I still find time to be with him and cuddle with him. Thank God DH is the same. My cat went through so much with me I can not imagine giving him up in a million years.

I had my cat before I met DH. If DH disliked cats/ my cat, well, that would have been the end of me and him

Unfortunately my cat dislikes LO though, he will never hang out with us if LO is up. Poor thing.

Best wishes to you, and I hope your cat finds a good home....

This makes me so sad for you. We are both so attached to our 2 cats. I can't imagine giving them away for any reason.

I'm with @MrsCB, "I love my husband more than anything, but if he made me give up my dog I'd kind of hate him for it."

We rescued our dog after getting married but it was a huge fight because DH would be happy not having pets and I can not live without a pet. It breaks my heart. Our dog has helped me through the loss of our pregnancy, infertility, the sudden loss of our family dog, and everything else life throws your way. I could not give him up.