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@MaryM: It may just be a phase that he's going through. DS1 HATED the car period. So it was always such a challenge going anywhere with him. If this is only on the way home from school, try being consistent with the ride. Sing a specific song over and over to get him to calm down. If DH has heightened anxiety, the baby is going to feel it too...so being consistent is key.

@MaryM: so you’re saying there is hope! Day 1 she took a 10 minute nap and a 20 minute nap I need a backup sleep sack for them, you reminded me. Unfortunately state (I think?) regulations mean they won’t swaddle them. I knew and we’ve been moving out of that for some weeks now but it’s still crummy lol.

@MaryM: no, not even those sadly. That’s what we were using at home! I honestly haven’t noticed a big change - we aren’t swaddling at night any more either and she still sleeps about 8-6; I think the big difference is in how long it takes her to fell asleep.

My thoughts may not be super helpful bc we used a nanny but that time of day (5-7 pm or so) was a total nightmare for both my girls when they were babies. Everyone’s tired and cranky and anything could trigger a total meltdown (btw this still happens at ages 2 and 4). There might not be anything to do to white knuckle the thankfully short drive home!

Not super helpful, but my guess is that LO just really needs to share those super tough feelings with you guys at the end of the day, and there isn't much you can do other than ride it out. You're doing all you can to make him feel comfortable and safe, and beyond that all you can do is accept that it's a tough time for him and that it will pass. We still have days like that with our 3 yo, but I know it's tougher with a tiny baby. He's sharing valuable feelings with you guys, and as much as it's hard, if you can ride it out, I think it will continue to nurture your bonds with him. Hang in there!

I bet it's a combination of things. He's probably tired. He's probably hungry. He probably misses you guys. It might just be him letting down at the end of the day. I know w DS I pick him up at 415-430 and as soon as we get home it's a whine fest. Whine, whine, whine, cry, cry, cry. He's just tired and hungry. I do my best to feed him asap and I try to hold him (bc that's all he wants) as much as feasibly possible. It is very hard and sometimes stressful. But I try to appease him as best I can until I take him to bed around 6 pm.

@MaryM: she’s in our rooms till. Honestly I think it’s mostly luck - I joke that she inherited our love of sleep. Then again, we’ve struggled right omg with day sleep/naps and that may be why!

@MaryM: Yea it sucked for a bit but now she is pretty much over it.

DD2 hated the car. I avoided drives any longer than 30 minutes for months until she learned to chill. It broke my heart to hear her screaming and it was such a relief to get her in my arms when I got her out of the car seat but I also knew there wasn’t anything I could do: some babies hate the car. Honestly I’d just ignore it. It’s such a short drive and if you know he’s safe and comfy and fed there isn’t anything you can do.

Does he take a binky? DS was the same way at that age after daycare pickup but we had a 35 min ride I tried nursing him in the parking lot and even on the side of the road but sometimes he would be so worked up, he wouldn’t nurse. What really worked for us was a trick my coworker told me. So, I would have a bottle of gripe water in the car and a cup holder with a few binkies. I would dunk one in the bottle and give it to DS. The taste encouraged him to keep sucking and if he dropped it, I would dunk another one and finangle it into his mouth. He also seemed to enjoy having the window down a little bit and finding a good AM station that was just static worked sometimes. Otherwise, I would just try to talk to him and say “I hear you are so upset right now. I’m listening to you. We will be home soon” on repeat and tried not to have a panic attack. Solidarity mama.