Hellobee Boards

@doxielove: @MrsMcD: @Crystal: I cautiously joined the IF threads despite not receiving treatment, Because, honestly, after 1 year of trying, that qualifies as infertility, whether I want to believe it or not. And some people choose not to take active steps to be diagnosed or treated, whether that's voluntary or due to financial reasons to what. I wasn't sure how others would take my posting - would they "accept" me. But they've been so welcoming, just like anywhere else on HB! And a lot of them have been through being diagnosed, medications, etc. which is helpful when you're sitting in limbo land still. It's ultimately a person preference to post there though!

I feel the same as many of the others. It's only been 9 cycles for us, we now know that we're also facing endometriosis. But, many women get pregnant in spite of that, so I'm just not sure that I belong there yet and don't want to step on their toes or make them feel like I know what they are going through.

I spent most of the day relatively miserable because af is just around the corner and I have killer cramps and back pain from the endo. I went to the chiropractors today and there was a mom with 3 sweet little boys, 1 month to 5 years old. Everyone gushed over them the whole time, the receptionist, the dr, etc. He even kept carrying on about how cute they are and about his new grandson through the whole adjustment...I wanted to tell him to just stfu. It was obviously more than I could handle today.

@runnerd: @LindsayInNY: I'm on my phone so I don't have the chance to reply to everyone but I think our IF group is very welcoming. Please join, if you feel like it. You don't have to have certain boxes to check off to be IF. I'm all about IF awareness and I don't think there is a specific criteria. Well, other than RESoLVE's definition.

"Infertility is defined as the inability to conceive or carry a pregnancy to term after 12 months of trying to conceive. If you are over the age of 35, the time of trying to conceive is reduced to 6 months. "

(ETA- I don't even fit this category. Haha. I felt like I had IF at cycle 8 when my second IUI failed.)

I know there are people like me with primary IF and others with secondary IF. IF is hard no matter how many children you have or don't have. I do think that personal experiences may make it seem like you have it harder than others but I think it's just normal to think that.

Then there's others who have had chemical pregnancies and miscarriages.

Then there's others who have IF and don't feel like that want any type of intervention.

You all know that I'm fairly open with my IF struggle. I have a tattoo on my wrist and I'm not ashamed to admit I have IF. I know this can be a private battle and others are more open or quiet about it.

The reason I asked this question because I was curious about if people feel ashamed to post in IF. I hope none of you fell unwelcome by our group. It might be a personal battle where maybe you haven't fully accepted being... gasp! The horrible word... Infertile.

I can easily use the word Infertility and proudly say it but the word Infertile is so harsh to me. I hardly ever use that word. Haha. Weird. I know.

Any way, please don't feel like you need to check off a certain box to post on IF boards. I actually think actively posting on the IF boards can promote IF awareness. Probably the reason I post on those threads. I'm sick of being hidden away. IF can make me feel so alone sometimes. Oh, don't even get me started when I found out users were purposely hiding the IF boards. Made me a tiny bit angry. Ok, that was lie. I was really pissed, but that the IF talking.

Anyway, I'm still on my phone so I'll get off my soapbox.

ETA: I do have to admit that my IF opinions have evolved over time. Sorry if I scared anyone. LOL! From when I had my first IUI to where I am now (starting IVF), it's so different.

@spaniellove: Thanks for popping in! Yup, I remember when the IF boards were created. I was so excited to have our own board. So happy to see you have graduated from IF and your LO will be here so very soon. Your journey gives me hope!

@littlek: Hopefully you'll find you have good luck after an HSG! Everyone has a story about how someone they know got KU right after an HSG. But I do think an eff it attitude is sometimes good...or at least freeing. There's only so long you can sustain thinking 24/7 about TTC, and sometimes it's good to just let things go a bit (and only think about it like 12/7, ha!).

@littlek: I really think the F It attitude is sort of the way to go. You can just do your best and nothing more.

I'm still pretty much F It about the whole thing. But I did make an appointment with my general doctor for March 7 in the am. I want to see what she says about me TTC. I can't get an appointment with my OBGYN until May. F that. Haha.

@Crystal: I don't dream about it, but my mind definitely has trouble going back to sleep after I wake up to temp every morning.

I'm doing OK, just hoping for good news at my monitoring appointment tomorrow, crossing my fingers we'll get the green light to trigger tomorrow night, for IUI Sunday. I've had a headache for 10 days straight now, and am eager to get off the meds I"m on! How are you doing?

@MrsMcD: Oh wow, May 7th to see your gyno?? That is nuts. Hopefully your appointment in March brings some good ideas for next steps. Is there anything in particular you want to get out of the appointment, or are you hoping for a referral to an RE or anything?

@littlek: I really hate BFN's too...so I thought I would just stop testing, but lo and behold, my period pisses me off just as much

Every time that I start not to think about it 24/7 something else comes up to make me think about it. I have had a few opportunities to take on some leadership positions lately at work, and I don't know what to do. I REALLY want to say yes, but I know that I'm not feeling that great most of the time and I'm not even doing my best at work right now, so taking on more doesn't really make a lot of sense, especially knowing that I will most likely be needing to take a week off for surgery as it is. When you combine that with my own inability to focus 100% on anything but TTC and it makes it even harder to commit to things.

I dunno, maybe I just need to commit and give myself something else to worry about to distract myself.

@littlek: Thanks! I hope that none of us need any upcoming appointments!

@owlteach: I totally hear about you about needing something to distract yourself. But don't have that distraction be more work! My husband did a sort of long term rent of a horse for me as a christmas present. That helps distract me. I also try to plan out the meals I will be cooking at home. That oddly takes up so much of my thought process and can lead to hours of internet "research". Also, looking at real estate sites like Redfin and dreaming about our next home purchase (years away, but still...). Focus on things you enjoy!!

Today, and really this whole week, I've felt just so drained. Work is slowly killing me. I really need a new job and cannot wait for hiring season to start. I honestly think that the stress from my job is a big factor in our ability to conceive. I'm set to O any day no and just have 0 energy to do anything about it, but if we want to have any chance this month then I need to just buck up and get it done!

It also doesn't help that I have been stress eating this week. At the end of the day today I sat at my desk and shoved Oreos in my mouth, one after another. *sigh*

@AmeliaBedilia: *hugs* sounds like we have similar problems today!!! Sorry about the medicial bill frustration- $3500 is a lot to be saddled with unexpectedly!

@CupQuakeWalk: just jumping in to say that I got in the day I called my RE and he's the best on Long Island. He happened to have a cancellation so fingers crossed you'll get in quickly!

@littlek: ok gotch ya. My OB told me to call on cd1 to make an appointment for cd 10 and no unprotected sex before the test.

@Boopers: I'm sorry that work is so rough right now, when it rains, it pours :(.

@sandy: @Boopers: Ohhhh....the stress eating, I really need to get my self control and work-out motivation back, but I just can't!

@MrsMcD: Yeah, I really love my job and this new responsibility is something I would normally be thrilled about, but I'm not really sure that I can give it the time and effort that it deserves right now.

@sandy: Thanks!

@Boopers: I know this is not PC, but I have always avoided or dreaded baby showers even before TTC. I think if I went to one, I might end up in jail.

Oh I guess I should introduce myself as well:
I'm 31, currently in the middle of O week of ttc cycle 7.
No kids yet just fur 2 babies a Bouvier named Hemi, and a Husky named Lily.
I have not undergone any testing yet but have been given a referral to a RE and have an appointment on 4/10.
I also love to bake and go extra crazy during the holidays, my family loves it though cause everyone ends up getting sent home with goodies!