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I'd be concerned about what the stress and grief would do, particularly in the first trimester. If you miscarried, you'd forever think it was the stress. My father had a heart attack and almost died about 6 months back, and it took me awhile to mentally calm down from that, and the grieving process of actually losing someone is quite long, ~18 months. You could speak to a professional about it...I imagine there is a clinical reason regarding why you want to ttc right away.

I'm so so sorry for your father, but I thought I would give you some little insight. When I found out I was pregnant with Mavrick (my first) my FIL was diagnosed with a Cancer (rare) and the docs gave him an undetermined time. They said if he lived past 6 months he was lucky.

Well.... the fact that he was going to be a grandfather (for the 4th time) but our first.... he fought strong and is actually still alive today (2.5 years later) the doctors just don't understand.

Sure we know it won't be with us for another 5 years, but just being able to play with Mavrick and actually be able to meet Sienna is such a blessing.

Whatever you choose to do, is the good choice. But having a baby on the way gave my FIL the hope he needed to, to fight.

hugs sweetie. xox I know the feeling.

What if you guys NTNP for a while? So that there's less pressure...

I'm sorry about your FIL. My feeling is, you shouldn't change your plans too much in light of the diagnosis, but if you started a little early and were able to tell him the good news, that might be a beautiful thing. I've never been in your position personally, but my friend was in a similar situation. her grandfather passed away shortly after she found out she was pregnant, but she was so happy she was able to tell him that she was having a baby before he passed.
There is no right or wrong.

ETA I misread, now I realize it's your own father. I suppose that would be even more stress on you. But, possibly it would make him even happier to know. I'm sorry you're going through this.

I hope whatever you go with feels right in your heart!

@Cole: 2 years ago this coming Christmas my brother in law passed away suddenly. He was all of 34 years old and the three of us were super duper close. Wherever we were, he was.
His death prompted us to move up our TTC schedule. Basically it made us realize that all of our reasons to wait were just .... pointless. They were a new job for my husband, more money saved up. But you know what, it doesn't matter.
For us that was the right time. It made us realize how damn short life really is.
The love we have for each other is more than words can express. Our desire to have children and start a family is as strong as that. To think that there could be a chance we can be waiting for no good reason and miss the opportunity was too much to bear.

The TTC struggle plus the aftermath of his death was definitely hard. But I will say when we got that BFP it was a ray of sunlight in a dark time for our whole family. Now our baby girl provides us joy everyday. And some days she's just the sunshine we (my husband, myself, my ILs) all need to come out of the darkness.

It's definitely a personal decision. But for us it was a wake up call.

Hugs to you.

P.S. On another note. My dad passed away suddenly when I was 13. It saddens me to no end that he has never seen me in love or know that I am a mother or to be a grandfather to my daughter.

We were actively TTC when my father-in-law passed of pancreatic cancer suddenly in October. The grief of first his diagnosis and then his death four weeks later really shocked my system - I had a 90 day cycle immediately following. I totally get your desire to want a baby NOW though; when they told us he had only months left, we badly wanted to get pregnant so that he would have something to look forward to/hold on for. Unfortunately, that didn't happen.

That being said, if I were in your situation, I would have wanted to start immediately. Now that I am on the other side of it, though...I know that it would have been too much to handle, with the morning sickness and the stress and grief. Stress and pregnancy aren't ideal partners, and I know I was so preoccupied with everything going on that I wouldn't have been as excited as I could have been. It might be good for you to have something else to think about, though.

I'm so sorry for your news - I know how difficult that is. Best of luck with everything.

I am so sorry to hear about your father. I lost my father to cancer 3 years ago after only a 5 month fight. My brother and sister-in-law went through the same TTC decision (were about to start when he was diagnosed). They waited due to the stress level, but there really isn't a good answer.
Having been through this 2 things you may not be thinking about that could matter.
If you are more than an hour or 2 away the extra traveling could really wear you out physically and make your first trimester unbearable. I have no idea how I survived those 5 months and I was probably a huge hazard on the road bawling my eyes out for most of the 2 hour drive.
Also from a time off work perspective-I had paperwork in with HR and was planning to start taking FMLA time to help take care of my father. He passed right before I used any, but FMLA has weird rules about how much you can take in a year (or maybe 12 month period?). If you were to take any time to help or be with him and you then got pregnant it could cut into your 12 weeks job protected unpaid leave. In case that could impact you.