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@Cherrybee: My husband does the "hit snooze then let the phone alarm go off while he's showering" move too. I get so annoyed! LO usually sleeps through it though. If he actually woke up I'd be pissed! Anything that would wake the baby and make it harder for me would annoy me. Especially when it's preventable.

If my LO woke up easily, I think I would move him into his own room. I know they recommend 6 months, but if everyone was getting poor sleep and it was causing issues, I'd at least see if he'd sleep better in there. Do you have a video monitor?

And for what it's worth, I roll my eyes when DH says he's tired too, haha. Guess I'm not much help because I'm right there with you!

I was the same way in the middle of the night and when DH got into bed. He was so noisy. It made me mad! You're tired, you're the one who has to put the baby back to sleep if she wakes up, so it's understandable. Things got better for us when we moved LO to her own room.

I totally get it, and I definitely endorse the white noise in the room if she must be there with you--and I really, really endorse moving her to her own room. She will be okay, and you will sleep better, and your marriage will do better. We've shared a room with LO only while traveling, and it nearly drove me insane. I lost my sh*t when my husband took one bedtime as an opportunity to explain to me the thing he didn't like about his new pack of t-shirts. She didn't wake, but she did a little moan ("Why the eff do you think now is a good time to discuss the necks of your shirts, papa?!?!") and I could have murdered him. He will never have the same standards as you and it will continue to drive you BONKERS.

But yes, as @grace says, apologize and explain that you are EXHAUSTED. Or, since you're english, maybe KNACKERED. And frame it as a problem you guys might try to brainstorm about together?

@Cherrybee: we don't have a chair in C's room either. I pick her up and being her to the glider in the living room, with the lights dimmed as slow as possible so I can just see what in doing. It's actually easier for me to stand up from the glider than from our bed or the bed in C's room so I think it's less disruptive to her. But she only wakes once per night usually, if it was more I might be more hesitant to have moved her. We do have the same 6 month room sharing rec but hardly anyone I know follows it and even my pediatrician said its fine.

What if you and your daughter bunked together in another room? We did this and I swear it saved my marriage.

It happens! I can blame my DH for just about anything these days. I have been really trying to communicate with him about the things that bother me and he has been good at trying to make sure he is careful. Being tired and all the things that come with PP play a factor and I dont think there is a whole lot we can do to help with it!

I think mama needs a little time to herself right now. I know I get super bitchy when I get overloaded.

When E used to sleep in our room, DH used to get dressed and everything in the bathroom/other room. Is that an option? Otherwise, moving her to the nursery with a video monitor definitely took the edge off our mornings. I can get up and make coffee now without worrying about waking her.

DH's alarm used to go off every morning (and it's LOUD because he wears a CPAP to bed for apnea) and the white noise machine kept E sleeping through it. It's a very loud white noise machine. Very loud.

I know your said your baby is a light sleeper, but you can't be on your tiptoes for the next 5 years. So some noise is good unless you want to live in silence every time she's snoozing. But i understand it's a huge PITA when the baby wakes up

PS our nursery doesn't have a chair either. If we needed to rock her, we'd go to the living room.

@purrpletulips: same here.

@Cherrybee: Hugs! I have a very difficult, nap-hating baby and I find myself being super short with my husband as well. You are doing such a good job with your sweet girl! I hope you can get a break to re-charge soon...and that your DH starts being a little more considerate of baby girl's sleep!

As far as mouth ulcers go--I get those, too! White vinegar on a q-tip is a LIFE SAVER for me. I get them when I'm stressed or eat lots of acidic foods (tomatoes, pineapple, oranges). The white vinegar helps big time!

Sorry you had a rough go of it when he got home. The stage you're in is very difficult and stressful. It does get better

We put white noise on for P (well really it's ocean sounds) and set up the speakers near her side of the bed, it really helps offset any noise coming from DH's side of the bed or room (like when he gets up). It's REALLY REALLY helped! Moving P solo or one of us moving out just isn't an option (I'm a big "we go to bed together" kinda gal). P rarely wakes up now when DH thuds into bed, snores, creaks while he rolls in bed, etc.
ocean sounds = life saver!

As for the snapping part... it stinks when we know we reacted about something that in the grand scheme of things doesn't matter. When I was really struggling with this I thought "If I reacted ___ way and something happens to DH when he lives how would I feel".. if it was badly then I just kept my trap shut and did the opposite of what I wanted. Not saying he shouldn't be more conscientious knowing our light lo sleeps (P was a really really light sleeper too like if you even THOUGHT about entering the room she'd wake), but leaving mad and having things unresolved through the day sucks for everyone.

big hugs!!! I'm sure being tired doesn't help.

@Cherrybee: P just woke alot until she got older (probably around 11 mths) I find that normal & acceptable for infant sleep though so it wasn't the pressing to me... well really I just had to get over it. lol P has also gotten pretty used to DH's loudness so she rarely wakes up to it anymore... Like I said though it used to be that if we even thought about going into the room she'd wake, I don't think I got more than 20 minutes during the day, and 1 good 4-5 hr stretch out of her (the one before we went to bed) until almost a year.