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Aww, I'm sorry. I just stew about it and forget!

It's hard to say without knowing what it's about.

I think if a friend did something inconsiderate likely without realizing, I would (in a neutral tone/location) say that I just wanted to let them know that XX, while I was sure she didn't do it on purpose, came off like ______ and hurt some feelings. (Or whatever the case may be.) Phrasing it just that you are sure she'd want to know since it wasn't on purpose and you're sure she wouldn't want to do it again. If I did that I would want to know for sure!

It totally depends on the situation. If I think there is a chance it could happen again and she still wouldn't realize it, I might say something. If it was a one time thing, I'd probably just stew about it and not say anything. I'm thinking about one particular situation that still annoys me, but I never said anything because there was no way to make it better by that point and we won't ever be in a similar situation. But since i still feel some resentment about it, maybe I should have.

I called out DHs friend today, it didn't seem like it got through still so DH is calling him later tonight to make things more clear because the guy is just being an entitled lazy brat and I'd probably end up saying just that to him if DH doesn't talk to him. We somehow get people who majorly overstep the bounds of friendship. We try to have a very welcoming house where people can stay (literally we've had house guests staying with us for many weeks for free) and go and share and most people know enough about boundaries and not being a burden but there's some who just really go too far. For me I mention things nicely in passing a couple times and if they don't change I really have to get stuff off my chest or I can't continue being friends at that point.