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What is the biggest source of stress / worry in your life?

  1. delight

    pomelo / 5326 posts

    TTC #2 and getting past the one year anniversary of losing our little girl

  2. winniebee

    hostess / wonderful grape / 20803 posts

    Closing on our home / Packing and moving in the next 3 weeks while also working and minding my 2 kids.

    Generally, I'm always stressed about Co-parenting/ balance. My husband is in his second year of private practice as a surgeon and it's busy as ever. He works 80+ Hours a week including weekends so I single parent a lot. And my husband is pretty messy at home. I feel like my house is always a wreck and I'm always 5 steps behind.

  3. Mae

    papaya / 10343 posts

    One week ago it was money. I lost my job a few days before I had LO and while we were *fine* while I was staying home, it was only because my student loans were in deferment and we weren't saving anything. Obviously that was not going to work forever and I've been looking for a hopefully part time but no-more-than-40-hours-a-week job for about a year now.

    Now it's time.

    Monday I was offered a job (45 hrs/week in office, which honestly is as good as it gets in my field, sigh) for much more money than I ever thought I'd make working reasonable hours. I accepted. Friday my husband was offered a promotion to management that he has been working so hard for for over a year, and he accepted. So in a week's time our income more than doubled and I'm VERY grateful that money is no longer something I need to worry about. But I am absolutely terrified of going back to work and sending my 18 mo old to daycare. She's never been watched by anyone but my mom and she's not an easy-going person. I'm so concerned about all these huge changes at the same time.. my going back to work, her going to daycare, my husband taking a much more challenging position that will require more time in the office. I feel like before I had MORE than enough time at home and no money. Now I'll have more than enough money but no time. I wish I could work half the hours for half the pay, but that's not how these things work

  4. Mrs.KMM

    grapefruit / 4355 posts

    @Mae: man - doubling income in a week has got to feel great! Congrats on both your job offers!

  5. mrsrain

    nectarine / 2115 posts

    Money. Although we are doing considerably better than ever before, still a long way to go!

    Pregnancy. I have difficult pregnancies, so we will all be very glad with DS arrives.

    My mom. She's s textbook narcissist, so even with many miles between us it is always a lot of work to be related to her.

  6. Mae

    papaya / 10343 posts

    @Mrs.KMM: you'd think so. lol. I mean when I focus on it, it is nice to have the concern over money done. But I'm finding it hard to focus on that rather than being scared about sending LO to daycare. Also I think it won't FEEL like we have a lot more money because most of it will go to not-fun stuff like daycare, student loans, retirement, college fund, savings, house cleaning service, and increased costs of working (parking downtown, business clothes, etc). Like all the big money worries will be taken care of. But it's not like I'll stop feeling like $5 is too much to pay for coffee lol.

  7. HLK208

    pineapple / 12234 posts

    @Mae: congrats!!! I hope the transition is seamless!!

  8. Mae

    papaya / 10343 posts

    @HLK208: thanks

  9. Mamasig

    pomegranate / 3565 posts

    Money! We make a good living but life is expensive and things always come up. Feels like you can never get ahead. I feel very fortunate though, I know that we have it better than many.

  10. Mamasig

    pomegranate / 3565 posts

    @Mae: Good luck, friend. At least with the extra money it can help to offset the expenses associated with going back to work.

  11. Mae

    papaya / 10343 posts

    @Mamasig: for sure. and I *think* (hope hope hope but we'll see) that it will cover having cleaning people. Which is a huge weight off because if I'm already feeling like I don't have enough time with LO, I don't want to spend the time I do have home cleaning the toilet.

  12. NavyRN2012

    persimmon / 1447 posts

    Work. I'm in the process of making a pretty difficult decision regarding my future in the military.

  13. Mamasig

    pomegranate / 3565 posts

    @Mae: That's how I feel exactly. My time with them is precious. I'm not spending it cleaning! So yes, my house is often messy but that's how it is. We have someone that comes monthly but on an every day basis it's half picked up.

  14. Keybee

    kiwi / 735 posts

    My weight. I really like food and am a big over eater. Baby girl is coming any day and I've gained a lot... I'm stressed about losing the baby weight and having any clothes that will fit.

  15. Astro Bee

    pear / 1503 posts

    @GingerBebe: Exactly the same, but with my inlaws. I am starting to resent them, and a little bit my husband for enabling them. He actually paid for my FIL's golf membership, when we had a newborn! I don't give a sh*t about your "quality of life." That is a luxury that you shouldn't ask your son for. Mortgage payment, or money for prescriptions, is another matter.

    @Mrs. Sunshine: Hugs to you! I hope you and your hubby work through it. We've had a few rocky points in our marriage the last few months, as well. Funny how having kids makes everything so wonderful, yet so much harder. If you need a sounding board or a shoulder, wall me.

  16. looch

    wonderful pear / 26210 posts

    I've worried about money since I had my first piggy bank at age 3, so I feel like that's a constant, lol.

    Right now, it's kindergarten. I am worried about the potential class sizes, emotional and social readiness and friendship drama.

  17. Ash

    honeydew / 7909 posts

    My weight. I am still 20lbs heavier than prepreg.

    And how unorganized my life/house is. I hate the mess.

  18. winniebee

    hostess / wonderful grape / 20803 posts

    @Mae: that's wonderful! congrats!

  19. winniebee

    hostess / wonderful grape / 20803 posts

    @oliviaoblivia: if anyone can handle this, it's you!

  20. winniebee

    hostess / wonderful grape / 20803 posts

    @delight:

  21. MOMTOLITTLEB

    persimmon / 1188 posts

    I worry about money but I am not disciplined enough to budget well so far. We're fine with money but took on a ton of expenses this year so we need to get more serious.

    My biggest source of stress is my husband's anxiety and depression. I feel like I don't always handle it well because I get frustrated. But at the same time I need a supportive partner and sometimes he can't be that in the way I need.

  22. littlebug

    honeydew / 7504 posts

    Money.

  23. babypugs

    persimmon / 1101 posts

    Like so many others, $$$. I just don't understand how even with two decent incomes and living extremely frugally it's still a struggle.

  24. looch

    wonderful pear / 26210 posts

    @Mae: Great news, congrats.

  25. lamariniere

    pineapple / 12566 posts

    @Mamasig: this is how I feel. On paper we are fine and I'm very grateful to be in the position we are in, but I always feel like we could be doing better. Since I work freelance, I can have really great months and not so great months and I often wish I was contributing more/more consistently to the overall number.

  26. wonderstruck

    pomegranate / 3791 posts

    Finances and health insurance. We're really struggling now that I'm back in school finishing my degree. Tuition plus daycare on one income is basically impossible. We just barely qualify for daycare assistance which I feel horrendously guilty about taking since I know I'm doing things out of order, but it's the only way we can afford for me to finish my degree.

    Our health insurance is a mess. DH's job doesn't offer it and the out of pocket options are insane. Last year we filled out all the forms online when the new healthcare programs rolled out hoping that we would qualify for a subsidy and ended up in limbo - couldn't get a subsidy because we potentially qualified for Medicaid, but Medicaid initially said we didn't. It took weeks of forms, stressful phone calls, and verifications to get it all sorted out. Now a year later our Medicaid status is up for review. I fill out the review stuff, and it tells me I'm past the deadline and it was due a week ago even though their website gives a due date that's still two weeks away. Many phone calls, nothing they can do, I'm told to re-apply and that we will likely be automatically accepted. So I do and once again were kicked into pending/might not qualify status. I would much rather pay some money and just get a subsidy, but they won't give us one since apparently we should "easily qualify for medicaid." Except not. It's a fucking nightmare and of course it's happening when I'm in final exam crunch time.

  27. LuLu Mom

    GOLD / wonderful olive / 19030 posts

    Money, like others have said I just feel like we can never get ahead. We both have good jobs and make decent money but with unpaid maternity leave this year, unexpected car and home repairs, we just got hit hard. We are hoping 2106 will be our turnaround year so we can move into a bigger house like we want.

  28. snowjewelz

    wonderful kiwi / 23653 posts

    Finance. DH's income will be dropping next summer, then possibly even more by next fall.

  29. Modern Daisy

    grapefruit / 4187 posts

    During my DH's last overseas business trip his boss (who is responsible for our big move and DH's remote arrangement) told him he might be leaving the company after bonus season. This is unsettling because even though he said DH would also get an offer from this other company nothing is set in stone. And if he doesn't DH's career could be in jeopardy. Of course we planned for this and financially we would be just fine, but the thought of making such a big change.. And not knowing what's going to happen is very stressful.

  30. Mrs. Champagne

    coconut / 8483 posts

    Right now my biggest stress is just being pregnant. I'm 10 weeks and terrified I'm going to lose the baby.

  31. BananaPancakes

    grapefruit / 4817 posts

    Money, always money. We're not behind, but some months it gets tight. We have a piece of lake property that is eating us alive and that we've been trying to sell for years, but you can't get a vacant land loan in our area, so unless you have serious cash to drop (almost no one), you can't buy vacant land. If we could get it off our backs, things would be great, but it's so much of our monthly income at the moment that I worry a lot.

  32. bushelandapeck

    pomelo / 5720 posts

    DH is looking for a new job as he is losing his early next spring...so that's causing a lot of stress for him. I'm optimistic that it will all work out, but he's typically pessimistic which is tough. I'm also stressed about my IL's, as they are both mentally ill and it's causing a lot of issues, especially with the holidays coming up.

  33. oliviaoblivia

    pineapple / 12793 posts

    @winniebee: I hope so!

  34. .twist.

    pineapple / 12802 posts

    Work. I hate hate hate hate hate my job right now. It is stressful and depressing. I am trying to leave but nowhere is hiring. I'm feeling super stuck & lost right now.

  35. daniellemybelle

    cantaloupe / 6669 posts

    Housework / to-dos. I always feel behind.

  36. avivoca

    watermelon / 14467 posts

    @.twist.: Right there with you.

  37. josina

    pomegranate / 3973 posts

    Money as a lot of other said. DH took his dream job but it came with a pay cut for the first 6 months, so now his 'better' hours w/o overtime, means he works a 2nd job to make up for it. And then to go with the paycut he NEEDS new tires on his truck and the 4WD went out of it last night. Lots of extra $$$ right at Christmas time.
    Plus I want to start on baby 2 and we can't afford that 2nd daycare bill. Ugh.

  38. Autumnmama79

    pear / 1703 posts

    @AprilFool: Big (((hugs))) to you today. Have you had your scan?

  39. sera_87

    pomegranate / 3604 posts

    pumping. I hate it & I don't get a lot which leads to the cycle of not pumping frequently (on a good day i average 4x a day, and none overnight, which I KNOW is bad) and its just a huge source of stress and anxiety.

    and getting this history assignment done by 4pm, which I'm very nearly done (page and a bit to go!) but I get easily distracted

  40. IRunForFun

    pomelo / 5509 posts

    @.twist.: Me too. I mean I'm in school part-time to make a career move but it'll take 5 years and in the meantime my job is the worst and I can't find anything else.

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