I am working on some of my issues regarding upbringing and want to be a great mother when we have kids. I would love to hear all of your thoughts on what makes a good mother or parent. Thanks!
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loving them sacrificially - I think the rest stems from that. Once you love them and would do anything for them, then you always have their best interest at heart...
Being honest with your kids, having grace, admitting your mistakes, spending time with them and truly listening to their needs.
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I think being a good mother you have to instill the importance of a strong family. I'm not a mother yet, but I feel that if you have a strong marriage with your husband, that will create a strong loving family, and being the mother, you are holding it together with love! So I agree with @Coco Bee: and love is the most important thing, love your husband and love your little one/s.
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This is such a hard question! Being a great mother is knowing when to stand beside them (letting them make the mistakes), behind them(catch them when they fall), and in front of them (protect them). And always, always love them.
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Gosh, this is difficult. I think being a good parent involves raising kids with guidance to make their own decisions...it's kind of like giving them enough rope but not allowing them to hang themselves. My son will learn that he isn't better than anyone else and he'll also understand that while I do love him, he can't treat either of his parents as doormats.
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The thing which made my own mother really great was that she never said "because I said so" when I asked why she wanted me to behave in a certain way. She always, always gave me the reason. If I asked her a question, she always answered it and if she didn't know the answer she'd admit that she didn't know and we'd find out the answer together.
I guess the crux of it was she respected me as a person, even when I was really small. I hope I can be like her when I'm a mum.
The parenting technique she used that I don't want to copy, though, was forcing me to eat everything on my plate before I could leave the table. She served up very large portions for me (she equates food with love and so wanted to feed me to show me she loved me) and would insist, even when I was full to bursting, that I kept eating until my plate was cleared. Not good!!!
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@MamaBehr: I love that definition! It made me get all teary.
@AmeliaBedilia: I worried about being a good mother because, until I met DH, I never wanted kids so I was never prepared. Once she came out, I couldn't believe how much I was in love with her and how easily bring a mother came to me. I wouldn't stress too much about what you need to be a good mom because I believe it is already inside you.
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I think recognizing that it's not at all about you anymore, it's about your LO. Patience. Love. You don't have to be perfect, you just have to do your best. All the time, or as much of the time as possible. Knowing it's worth the effort. And recognizing that you're doing these things. Making sure you're ok and doing what you need to do to keep you ok - yoga once a week, coffee with a friend, babysitter a few nights a week, so you have the strength to continue to do all of the above.
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