What would you do if you found your nanny sleeping while your 13 month old was playing? I was working from home the other day, and my nanny was asleep for a good ten minutes. This was not during LOs naptime, and it's not like he was in a playpen. I thought it was crazy and most people would have fired her on the spot, but my husband seems to have a different opinion. Am I overreacting? I know my nanny always complains about insomnia. We are actively trying to search for her replacement for other reasons, but I am surprised that this incident hasn't convinced my husband to up our efforts.
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I am not typically an overreactor when it comes to my kid but i would have fired her on the spot. It's work. I'm not allowed to sleep at my desk and a nanny can't sleep while taking care of a child.
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@raintreebee: that happened to me. I fired her a$$ on the spot and never looked back... And it wasn't a 13 month old, it was my 4 year old. Crappy! Brings back a lot of anger.
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I would be livid and would fire her on the spot! Its not ok! Your DD could have gotten into anything!
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If I fell asleep at my desk for 10 minutes I'm almost certain I'd be fired on the spot. And my work doesn't have the potential to run off and get hurt or into a lot of trouble.
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@raintreebee: @hotchildinthecity: totally agree. The very least a nanny can do is supervise the child at all times. That is the basic, basic agreement of what a nanny is.
I'm pregnant and sick and I have never, not once, fallen asleep while my toddler is awake.
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Holy crap! I can't imagine just falling asleep while watching my littles. If I were you, she'd be gone. What did she say when she woke up?
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Fired on the spot - no questions asked.
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@Synchronicity: That she wasn't sleeping, but she was snoring!!!!
I am glad I am not totally crazy. I would have fired her on the spot, but we live in NYC so no good backup childcare solutions. We hopefully are going to make an offer to a nanny this weekend with whom we have had two interviews and a trial. Ugh.
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I'd fire her once you find a new nanny.
Think about it this way. What would happen if you fell asleep at work? Do you work in a situation where bad things could happen in 10 minutes? Would you be fired in that case? Ugh. Sorry.
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Fire on the spot, like any other job where you are caught sleeping!
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Absolutely fire on the spot.
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@yoursilverlining: I was going to say the same thing... DH does a lot of hiring/firing, and he always mentions the reasons you can absolutely be fired on the spot. Being late-- no. Caught sleeping-- YES.
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Fired on the spot!!!
I fell asleep one time while my toddler was awake and she was right on top of me watching a movie. I think I was asleep for 5 minutes and she started trying to get down so I woke up. I felt super guilty!
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How did you react to catching her sleeping?! I'm assuming you woke her up??
I'd fire her immediately and seek out alternate care options for my LO for the next day.
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I would fire her immediately. If this was a daycare employee they would get fired right away too!
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I don't think I'd be fired on the spot if I fell asleep at my desk, but (unlike a child) my spreadsheet isn't going to hurt itself if left unsupervised for 10 minutes! I hope the new nanny accepts your offer
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Oh and the lie is so much worse than the actual sleeping.
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Based on the other replies, I think my opinion is a little too lax! Its one thing if she actively closed her eyes and tried to sleep, but another if it was unintentional because of exhaustion. Not that its a job you should be doing exhausted... I probably would've just given her a warning, especially if you're looking to replace her anyway.
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Completely unacceptable and grounds for termination
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I totally fell asleep on the floor last weekend while E was running around and playing, LOL. DH found me and was like "Um....are you ok?". But hey, that's my own damn house.
A nanny? No. not ok!
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This happened to me. I left for an appointment, and when I came back, the sitter was asleep on our couch while my 22-month-old played unsupervised. I was so shocked that I didn't fire her on the spot, but I let her go an hour later, once I'd had time to process it. DH was furious that it happened at all, and wrote an angry review on the website where we'd found her.
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I would fire her, her job it to ensure the safety of the child.
However just thinking about it, I don't know if my boss would fire me if they caught me sleeping right now, he would probably be like "is everything okay?" and as long as it was a one time thing I would be let off the hook.
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I would let her go. I've been that sleepy that I didn't even realize I had fallen asleep when I woke up from a micro nap. I wouldn't have wanted to be a nanny feeling like that, not safe, especially if she also drives your LO. Maybe it'll be the wake up call she needs to try and take care of the insomnia.
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That's completely unacceptable!
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I know for a fact I would not be fired on the spot for falling asleep for 10 minutes at work, and I would be very surprised if most people would.
I also would probably react more like your DH, not an okay situation, but I don't know that being fired on the spot is the response I would have. Definitely having a conversation about how that is totally not okay, and won't be tolerated in the future (although it doesn't appear that she has much of a future with you guys anyways.)
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@blackbird: yeah DH falls asleep all the time in the morning while they are watching Mickey together.
I would fire her once I found a replacement. I can't fall asleep at work. I don't think I would be fired on the spot but this is someone watching your child.
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I think you are doing the right thing by looking for her replacement. I understand you can't go without childcare for weeks so it's a tough spot. I'd just be worried it would happen again. Can you work from home most of the time?
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I wouldn't be fired for falling asleep BUT I'm not watching dependent children. I think your plan to replace her will resolve this issue. In the meantime, a very serious discussion with her should hold you over until you get someone hired.
I have had this situation when managing a memory care assisted living environment. A nurse who was there observing as a new hire fell asleep while visiting with elders and staff. She was immediately terminated. She had the same excuse of insomnia and taking a Benadryl due to a bad sunburn but I SO did not care about the reason.
Hopefully the new nanny accepts the offer and you guys can let the current one go ASAP! I would definitely address it with her in the meantime though. Otherwise she may assume you're cool with it.
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@NeekieRose: Yeah I was thinking this too, I am pretty curious about all these jobs people have in which they think they'd be fired on the spot for falling asleep. I know I wouldn't - I have taken several naps on my office couch during this pregnancy for starters. I do think a nanny is a different situation though. My job doesn't involve caring for any human life.
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I would fire her, too. I think being a nanny is a job where you can't fall asleep!
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I will clarify that I don't think I'd be fired on the spot for falling asleep but I work at a desk in marketing. I am not responsible for someone's life.
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I fell asleep a handful of times when my son was younger and I was pregnant. My husband has too. Its exhausting to be a parent.
On that note though I would never fall asleep caring for other people's children. Im at a job and the job is the kids. I worked as a nanny and Ive been ill and tired and pregnant at different times when working and as much as I wanted to lay down and sleep I never have because when Im at a job Im working. At home its different since its my home and my kids so if anything happens its on me and my guilt but if Im caring for someone else's kids then Im liable.
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@MOMTOLITTLEB: Yes, I can work from home since my school is on break, so that is lucky.
@coopsmama: She just said she wasn't sleeping even though she was snoring. I didn't wake her up because I wanted to see how long she'd go!Thanks everyone! At least all of her latest mishaps have confirmed my belief that we need to move on. In the meantime, I'll do everything I possibly can to ensure LO is safe.
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I would've fired her on the spot. Anything could have happened to your LO in those 10 minutes that she was asleep.
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Wow, I'm certainly no helicopter parent but I'd absolutely fire her asap.. If I wanted to go out and leave my son unsupervised I could do that without paying for it! I don't think you can compare it to desk jobs. Good luck with the new nanny
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That is most definitely NOT ok! I have. 13 month old as well and she is into everything, no way would I be ok with her being unsupervised for ten minutes!
When DD1 was 13 months old, I was still in the first tri of pregnancy with DD2 and was having the hardest time staying awake during the day. There were a couple of times I started to drift off whilst watching her and it completely freaked me out. There is no way I would be ok with someone I was PAYING to watch my child accidentally falling asleep on the job.
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I would not have fired her on the spot. Mistakes happen and your child is ok. I think the real issue here is that there are other issues on top of this one. If this was an isolated incident, I would have sat down with her for a long conversation and explained exactly how you felt and that if it ever happened again, you would need to find someone else.. Maybe she was sick and she didn't think she could take a sick day. Maybe she has something going on in her life that is very stressful or difficult. I always gave my nanny the benefit of the doubt. Being a nanny is difficult, unappreciated work. A warning for something like this is more appropriate in my view.
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Edited:
Yeah, not okay.
I wouldn't fire on the spot but I would confront and then make a decision. But, since you already have other issues, maybe this would be the straw that broke the camels back. -
While the child is awake and playing and there are other issues already? Fired. First time offense? Discussion/warning. If the kiddo is napping, though? I encourage my nanny to take a nap then. It will leave her feeling better when the kids wake up and she needs to be ready to go again.
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41 comments