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I was the "aunt" with age differences of 4, 8, and 12 years and they knew I was their aunt, but do not call me aunt. They actually tell others I am more like an older sister but we spent A LOT of time together as kids.

I have a technical aunt who is 21 and I'm nearly 30. I definitely don't call her "Aunt so and so" and we have a cousin relationship. I think your MIL is being a little odd. If that happened with H, I would still have her call them by their first names.

In this case I would just say their name. I usually only call my aunts/uncles but that if I'm referring to them as someone else, otherwise if I'm talking to them in person I just call them their name. But I will say to my daughters "go give Aunt X a kiss/Uncle Y a hug" and my oldest does call heraunts by Aunt but not Uncles...not sure why? haha I just realized that now.

Your MIL is being weird. I would keep calling them by first name only.

In my culture, "titles" and stuff are important, so I would have them say "aunt X" and "uncle Y."

So, my dad has this sitution as he is 14 years younger than his nearest sibling. I have cousins that are grandparents, basically.

All of my cousins, who are at most 4 years younger than him, call him uncle. But they're old school.

While I would be more inclined to call children and teens by their first name, if your LO correctly uses Aunt/ Uncle with her adult aunts and uncles I don't see why she can't or shouldn't use them with her younger ones. My family is a bit more formal with the familial titles though. I wonder if your MIL is really pressing the title issue because she wants to assert her children as having authority over yours.

So, my Dad has a nieces and a nephew that are 1-3 years younger than him, and they just called him by his first name when they were kids and started calling him Uncle as teens/adults as almost a joke (everyone gets a giggle out of it) they grew up in separate houses on the same farm though - so grew up like siblings.

I think either first name or Aunt/Uncle first name is fine. They are a biologic aunt, so why would it be inappropriate to use that term? My best friend has siblings from her mom's second marriage that are much closer in age to her kids than to her, but her kids still call them Uncle Drew and Aunt Cassie. Sometimes her kids call them by just their first name, and that's okay too. Doesn't need to be a big deal. I don't think it's worth a struggle with your MIL. If you want to use first names, go for it. But don't try to convince her that she's wrong for using Aunt and Uncle.

I have an aunt who is a few years younger than me. I just call her by her first name and have never called her Aunt Anna. Growing up we had more of a cousin relationship. She lives half way around the world so i don't really interact with her anymore.

I agree with @ShootingStar: . I think your DH needs to tell her to stop correcting your kids on this. They can call them whatever they're most comfortable with, whether that's "aunt/uncle blah blah" or just "blah blah". If your MIL wants to refer to them as "aunt/uncle blah blah" then whatever, but she shouldn't be correcting your kids.

@coopsmama: If she constantly corrects your kids, I would be returning the favour and begin to correct hers! they are children after all, and although they are technically your kid's aunt/uncles, they are also your dh YOUNGER siblings, and should have some respect.

I agree with previous posters. I would go by first name only. Your MIL is being strange. She probably is worried that if her kids are like cousins to yours then that makes you on the same "level" as her (which you are, really). She probably doesn't like that because she wants to be your DH's mother with more experience and Grandma rather than an aunt. Still, she needs to get over it. It was her decision to have her children so far apart in age that she has children the same age as her grandchildren.

Sounds like the issue here is much bigger than titles. I would just flat out tell your MIL that you and your husband are perfectly capable of parenting your own children and if she and her children don't stop correcting them, you'll have to stop spending time together.

@Truth Bombs: Agree with this.

My LO has an uncle that is 11 and an aunt that is 8. We alternate between "Uncle ___" and "Auntie ____" and just their first names when we refer to them. LO calls them by their first names because she is not yet two and it's easier.

I think their mom (my dad's wife) would kind of like them to have the titles by how she talks (always using them) but she has never outright said anything and no one would ever make a big deal out of it.

I think the kids do like being an aunt & uncle and take the "job" seriously. I think that is sweet and when LO is older I will probably encourage her to call them Aunt & Uncle. But they are also a little older than her which helps especially as they will be teenagers relatively soon and she will still be a kid.

I agree that the bigger issue is the correction and lack of respect for you as the parents, though.