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I started buying stuff during my second year of IF when things were getting really hard. It was sort of a way to help me cope by helping me imagine that we would one day use these baby items. After I bought something, I would put it into storage under our bed so I dididn't have to look at it all the time but knowing it was there was like a little beacon of hope.

I'm pregnant now and while it's still early (8w5d) I'm starting to relax a little bit. I was a nervous wreck until we saw the heartbeat at 6w5d. I started lightening up a little after that and now that we saw our little bean again on Monday and everything is growing on track I'm starting to feel a little less anxious and believing we will have our little miracle in February.

ETA: I hope you get your BFP soon and that IVF is successful for you!

I have not purchased anything, yet I keep saying we will when we find out the sex, but I know I am scared too, it just is always a worry, I know buying or not buying is not going to change the outcome of things, but it just still at times seems unreal!

We have prepped baby's room new carpet, cleaned out and ready to be filled, that is nice to look at make me happy

We have been TTC/battling infertility for 3 years. I have only purchased one baby related item. I got the Kate Spade diaper bag I love because they pattern was being discontinued and I got it for less than half price. I love it. Up until that point I didn't buy baby related items because I was being silly and superstitious and thought I would "jinx" myself if I bought things (crazy, I know).

@Sunshine1810: I know what you mean. I used to try not to 'jinx' myself, too. But in my journey, I've realized that our IF journey doesn't have any rules. Sadly, all of those 'TTC tricks' don't get us pregnant, so I don't believe in superstitions any more. We might not have luck in getting pregnant easily but (for me) I don't think buying a baby item will prevent us from getting pregnant. Infertility is way out of our hands. Time is the only thing I'm waiting for. It will come. At least, this is what I think at this time. Ask me in about 2 weeks when I POAS. I'm sure I'll change my tune.

Now, emotionally, if it's hard to see baby stuff, it is completely understandable. But for me, buying things helps me.

For me, it took a long time to buy anything. After the first year of IF, I stopped looking for sales/deals, and by the second year, I started avoiding baby sections/stores all together. I don't think I made my first purchase until after the 20 week anatomy scan, except for a pair of shoes I bought for our annoucement.

@Robyn_ZA: I'm so glad you asked this! This is something I've been thinking a lot about lately. I really love sewing and knitting and have made so many fun gifts for friends. I have moments where I want nothing more than to knit or sew something for my future (hopefully) baby. But, I get so caught up and superstitious about it.

I also agree with what you said about it being a very sad reminder of IF.

Maybe a nice idea would be to do what @mrstal did by having a space under the bed or in storage to put baby items if you don't want to constantly see them or if things aren't going well? I think I may begin the knit baby blanket after all

@Robyn_ZA: I completely understand how you feel. It is still so hard to wrap my head around how some couples decide to start a family and boom next thing you know, pregnant.

We went back and forth a lot of when the right timing was to start IVF. I chickened out a few times. It made me more anxious than excited. This time around, we are going through with it very soon and it feels much different. I just can't wait to get started. I actually feel like those people who decide to get pregnant and it happens. I feel like we are starting a family very soon! I haven't bought myself anything and probably won't until I'm actually pregnant but what I have allowed myself to do is work on my secret pinterest boards and pin pregnancy style, gender reveal ideas, pregnancy advise, ect. It all gets me excited and makes it feel real. It helps me keep hopeful that this is going to work with I feel is really important for me.

For some women it helps to buy things to help them imagine and dream about having their future babies. For me, I couldn't even get near baby stuff until our 4th month of pregnancy. Then it finally occurred to me that this was really happening and I could buy something! My husband and I bought just one onesie at that time and hung it up so that we could see it daily. After our 20 week ultrasound when we found out the gender, then we started buying lots of things.

If it will help you, I say go for it!!! Can't wait to hear how your upcoming IVF appt. goes!!!

Before I was engaged, I would look at wedding websites in secret and even bought a wedding magazine that I hid under my bed. I didn't want buying baby items to be the same experience where I was doing it in secret and hiding things away. It wouldn't be as joyful for me.

With that said, if buying things feels hopeful and makes you happy, go for it! What you've purchased there is adorable. A friend of mine has an entire nursery set up and believes in the "if you build it, they will come," idea. There's obviously no right or wrong answer for this one.

My first baby item was purchased when I was very newly pregnant--I don't know if I had even had by 6.5 week ultrasound yet. I saw a Baby Bjorn babysitter bouncer for sale on Craigslist, along with a toy and cover, for $50! My husband still doesn't appreciate what an amazing deal that was. We've received a few gifts from our parents, but haven't bought anything else past that.

I have thought many times about how the phrase "ignorance is bliss" is probably never more true than during pregnancy. I think a missed miscarriage is the scariest thing to me. But I had this turning moment, luckily early on, during a workout class at the gym. As I was flailing around, the instructor was encouraging us to imagine kicking any anxieties or fears we were experiencing away. I went with it, and you know what? It helped! I thought about how we had tried for awhile and gone through a lot to get here, so it would be a shame to spend most of the pregnancy stressed and worried. And this is just the beginning--there will always be something to worry about with a child! I still have concerns (I did take a pregnancy test at 10 weeks), but I try to enjoy the moment as much as I can. We've started telling people, and that has definitely made it more exciting!

@Robyn_ZA: That is so cute!!! I love little footy onesies! I like what @Happygal: 's friend said "if you build it, they will come." At least occasional positive visualization seems to be helpful for me! FX that your IVF journey is fast and successful the first try!

@Happygal: You're being so brave! Please know that I'm thinking of you! And that was an amazing deal-- way to go for it!