If you give your LO timeouts, what type of bad behavior is deemed time out worthy to you?
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My own LO is too young for time outs (4weeks!) but with other kids I only would use time out when they are overstimulated by a situation or when the situation is escalating and they need to calm down. I feel that is the most effective way to use time out in general.
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Yesterday E was playing with a 9 month old baby at our house. and she wasn't sharing. She kept pushing her away and grabbing a toy or chair away when the baby tried to play. i gave her a timeout and it totally worked. I asked her if she would share now and she said yes and she did. I could see it took self control. Timeout pain was worse than not sharing. I gave plenty of warnings before the timeout but after 5 mins of her rude behavior I followed through.
It was the first time I had done it in front of another parent so glad it worked. The last time I did it was several months ago and that was for climbing on a chair or the table ( when she was super little it was very unsafe)...now I wouldn't give one to her for that. So I guess it is for a negative behavior I have talked to her about but see her disobeying and just needed a little extra concrete lesson about how how important it is to listen.
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LO is too young right now but I think blatant disobedience warrants a time out. Doing something wrong/bad is okay but if after being told why it was wrong/bad and she still does it, then oh boy, little girl better watch out.
What did your LO do???
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@Rubies: I was wondering the same!
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We do time outs when we tell her no and she keeps doing it.
Ie. She used to slap our faces. HAHA. Hilarious at first until she kept doing it. After the first time we tell her no. If she does it again we tell her "no hitting. time out?" and if she does it a third time she gets time out.
She stopped hitting after her 2nd time out.Lately she's been playing with DH's printer. He kept telling her no but she wouldn't listen, so she got a time out today.
We didn't start time outs until she was 17-18 months old and understood what we were saying.
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@Rubies: @808love: she was hitting me this morning so I gave her a timeout. But I was just wondering when other people use timeouts, in general.
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@Andrea: Oh yes! She can't be hitting Mom! Best to learn that real quick.
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We abuse time out threats b/c we know we can.
Our 3-year-old hates time outs so he starts to behave almost as soon as we mention it. As for for what reason...let's see, jumping from couch to table or was it table to couch, pretty much jumping off from anything, hitting his little brother, throwing things, etc. You get the idea. Oh, and tantrums for sure! The 3s are the worst! But when he's good he's really good and that does happen. We also threaten to take away his favorite toys when he starts to misbehave instead of time outs. Just depends. Either way, we use two ways to help him "reset." *Sigh* I hate doing it...but it has to be done.
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@Andrea: Hitting is a big no-no.
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I usually give a warning and then it's a time out. Not listening, hitting, refusing to get clothes on are the most common no-no's that deserve a time-out in our house.
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@HeatherlovesKenny: I read once that timeouts are more effective at stopping bad behavior then they are at getting toddlers to do something you want them to do... so was curious what your experience has been using timeouts to get dressed! Does it work well in that scenario?
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@mrbee: I also use timeouts for getting dressed and other things that they are fighting you on. It works just as well for us.
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@mrbee: That makes sense. In my case, DS screamed and threw his body every time I would try to put his clothes on, then he would run away--so I explained to him that he was in a time-out for disobeying me/not cooperating. It lasted a few weeks (so at least one time-out a day) but finally the bad behavior stopped. He use to like dressing himself (without tantrums) but once his sister was born, he wanted my help.
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We pretty much only use timeouts for violence (hitting, kicking, etc...), safety issues (like climbing over the couch), and when DD has been consistently not listening to us. We went through a period when she was getting 1 or more timeouts a day, but lately we haven't had to do it at all. In fact, she got one this weekend (she kicked Daddy) but before that it had been almost two months since her last timeout.
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I've actually completely stopped using timeouts, as I've had really good results using some other techniques. I think timeouts are great for when your LO can't really communicate that well, but once you get to a certain age then I personally am finding that alternative approaches can be more effective!
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@mrbee: You should write a (blog) post on it! I'm finding that we don't need timeouts as much now that DD is older and understands more/communicates better, but I'm always looking for alternatives!
Our 3-year-old hates time outs so he starts to behave almost as soon as we mention it. As for for what reason...let's see, jumping from couch to table or was it table to couch, pretty much jumping off from anything, hitting his little brother, throwing things, etc. You get the idea. Oh, and tantrums for sure! The 3s are the worst! But when he's good he's really good and that does happen. We also threaten to take away his favorite toys when he starts to misbehave instead of time outs. Just depends. Either way, we use two ways to help him "reset." *Sigh* I hate doing it...but it has to be done.
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