In the past few months as my belly has really started to grow DS has been asking alot of questions on how we are going to get the baby "out". In his young preschooler brain he thought the Dr. was going to get the baby out threw my belly button. After a few weeks of him talking about it I decided he should know the facts. I found some good videos of live births that were not to graphic but still showed enough so he would know where the baby comes out of and what happens. He was very interested in the videos and understood what was happening. He now says the "Dr. is going to help me get it out of my mommy booty" lol. After talking to some family they thought it was gross/weird that I would allow him to watch the videos? Would you let your young child watch a birth video? Or would you rather they not "know" what is going to happen?
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We always just left it as, "She will go to the Dr. and the Dr. will help her get it out". This seemed to be enough information for the little guys.
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My mum always said that if I was old enough to ask the question I was old enough for an honest answer. Of course, she tailored the details to suit my age - just like you did. It sounds like he completely understood and isn't traumatised in any way so I'd say you did the right thing.
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I think honest age appropriate answers is best. If they are old enough to ask more than they are old enough to know the answer. Mine were very interested in how their sister was going to come out but I was going in for a c section so we just said the doctor was going to take the baby out of mommy's belly and that mommy would have a big boo boo. They seemed satisfied so we left it at that.
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@Ali: I agree with your mom.
At first I thought you meant in the actual room while you give birth-- that, I would personally draw the line at. I know plenty of people do it, but I wouldn't be comfortable with my small child thinking the new baby was hurting me.
But, since he kept asking questions even after you told him some very basics, I think what you did was really appropriate. Better for him to understand how it works now than to learn about it when he is a preteen and totally grossed out, right? -
i'm with @foodnerd81 - thought u meant in the actual room to which i'd say no way jose!
i agree with @ali - sounds like you handled it appropriately. i personally wouldn't but to each their own.
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Yep! We planned a homebirth and left it up to DS (8 y/o) to be here or not. If he had been a bit younger he probably would've been more intrigued and gone for it. lol. I think it helps promote a natural perspective to birth instead of it being some taboo/scary thing.
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Not in real life (or someone my kid knew). Lots of dads are traumatized seeing their wife in that much pain, so I wouldn't want to risk it in a child. But, if I found a video that didn't look too bad, i might. Or I might start off with an animal birth. Those are really cool and the animal usually doesn't look in pain.
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No, I would for sure not allow it in real life, and I would be hesitant about videos at such a young age. I would try finding a book or something else that helped me explain it correctly without potentially traumatizing him/her.
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Yep, I would totally let DD watch a birth video when she's old enough to understand what it is going on (3-4-ish maybe?). If our hospital would have allowed it, I totally would have let her watch DS's birth. Fwiw, my mom always had her kids in the hospital room while giving birth and none of us were scarred by the experiences.
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If my lo was truly interested in the process I totally would. However thankfully she was content knowing that the baby was in my belly and that she was going to come out. Especially since I ended up with a c-section, there is no way I would show her that but I showed her my scar and she understood.
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Sure, as long as the birth was natural and calm and quiet. There are plenty of births that are scary to ME, haha! But a water birth or something similar would be nice. I wouldn't want my LO's impression of birth to be one of helplessness or fear.
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I wouldn't allow my youngest (5) to watch any type of birth at this age. My oldest (9) that would be a different story.
But, in this situation I wouldn't have shown actual videos.
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