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I'm speaking for my husband here, but he became disillusioned with the church early in his life. They are very legalistic in the area that he grew up in, so he was kicked out of religious school for having long hair, his mom was told that she couldn't wear long earrings to church, and then a lot of the pastors in his area are very corrupt (one that he is distantly related to embezzled money). He is also a biologist and believes in evolution, which doesn't mesh with the church's beliefs on creation, especially where he is from.

College. People questioning my beliefs and hearing beliefs different from my own. I went to private, Catholic school Kindergarten through high school. It's easy to maintain your beliefs when everyone around you believes the same thing and it's what you're taught is "right."

Also just growing up and experiencing more. Too many bad things happen to good people and I couldn't continue believing what I believed with all of that going on around me.

I was raised Catholic and believed as a kid but as I grew out of Santa and the Easter bunny religious teachings just made less and less sense to me (I'm mentioning those characters to be inflammatory in any way, that's just how I remember it). I recall by junior high I didn't really believe any of it. My parents made me attend confirmation classes in high school but I chose not to be confirmed. I was the only "out" atheist at my catholic high school. I actually miss a lot of things about the church community and traditions but I just don't believe.

For me, I grew up Catholic, got confirmed, went to a Catholic college, the whole nine yards, and as an adult I realized that I was identifying myself as Catholic even though I strongly disagreed with many of the church's positions, mainly on social issues. I got called out for being a "Cafeteria Catholic", so I took a hard look at what I really believed (and not just what I was told to believe as a kid) and came to the conclusion that I don't really believe in God. I'm very logical and science-oriented, so I think that has something to do with it, too. Organized religion seems a little like make-believe to me as an adult. I still have a bit of sentimental nostalgia for some of the good things about religion (the traditions, the sense of community and belonging) but I don't identify myself as Catholic anymore. I don't go around telling people I don't believe in God (except here, apparently, haha) but that's how I feel.

@PurplePeony: I feel the same way, that I liked the community and traditions, but I never truly believed the religious aspects of it.

ETA: Please don't flame me for this, because I know there are plenty of people whose faith is strengthened by this, but I also think that, while it definitely wasn't the tipping point for me, going through infertility has helped cement my feelings a bit more. Being told about "God's plan" and "God's little blessings", etc, etc, plus the church's stance on IVF, really made me feel like I had come to the right conclusion about religion (for me).

I was probably never really "religious" to begin with, but I grew up in the Bible belt and did go to church as a kid. In high school, I wasn't sure what I believed, so I got involved with Young Life because a few of my friends went and said that it wasn't pushy and it could help me figure things out. They were right. I went on a Young Life summer getaway when I was maybe 16 and really kept my mind open to the possibility of religion, or not, in my life. But throughout the week-long trip, my doubts about religion continued to be reaffirmed; I simply didn't and couldn't agree with the vast majority of what was going on, and I knew my mind was made up as to where I stood. I've never doubted being an atheist since.

I also agree with @lawbee11: about bad things happening to good people. I simply cannot believe that any sort of god would let people suffer because there is a meaning to it or because god has his reasons. I wondered why if someone I knew was suffering from something awful, or whole populations of people were being brutalized/starved/dying of horrendous diseases in far away places, how did I get so lucky? How is that choice made by a higher power?

I grew up Methodist and am currently non practicing. I'm not really sure what I believe truthfully. I have been doing some searching since our first child is on the way and we will likely enroll them at a daycare at a private Catholic school that feeds into preschool-8. I'm not opposed to my child leading about religion, I'm just not feeling like I will be doing the teaching.

Even though I grew up in a "religious" household there were a lot of bad things going on. Plus I really never felt the presence of God in my life, I prayed, I was desprate to feel something, but it never came. To me I loved the social part. The summer camps and youth groups were much better than my home environment.

We had a difficult expirence with a non denominational Christian church that we stopped attending several years back. For me religion is such a big business and I have found that those we meet at church are not the most authentic bunch. Ultimately people are given authority as spiritual leaders without much vetting in my expirence. Anyone with rudimentary knowledge can talk the talk, if that makes sense.

I'm open to anything, and don't have very strong options, and I'm ok with that. M and I are on the same page, in the same place.

I'm not sure if you wanted to hear from people like me since I will never identify as an atheist, there is a wide spectrum out there between the most devout and the most skeptical. Also look into agnostics, I think sometimes people say they are atheists but their beliefs more accurately are agnostic.

@coopsmama: Well, my dad is and always has been agnostic. He never came to church with us...it was just me, my mom & my brother (who is also now an atheist). Ironically, I used to feel so sorry for him that he was going to go to hell. My mom has been great about it. She understands that I have reasons for not believing; it's not like I'm just doing it to rebel. Her love for me is unconditional and that never changed. I'm sure she was disappointed, but she never told me that. Truthfully I think she agrees with a majority of the points I've made to her, but she finds a lot of comfort/security in her religion so I don't ever see her giving that up.

I don't know if I'd call myself atheist but I'm definitely agnostic. The struggles my DS2 went through made me question how a god could let that much pain happen to an innocent baby. I know terrible tragedies happen every day, worse than what our family endured, but I just totally lost faith.

@Pumpkin Pie: I find myself praying often that my son will stay asleep. Haha!

@Danizaur: you bring up a good point. I think the teachings and values of christianity are really amazing and beautiful. If only all those things were actually practiced. I found the church to be a least welcoming place.

I know.... sleep is a problem.

@Danizaur: It took me a long time to get to that place. For me, it definitely hinges on the type of church I attend. There was one that I attended a few times last year where the pastor openly said that if you were looking for a church to fit you, rather than fitting the church, you were wrong. That didn't sit well with me.

@Pumpkin Pie: I definitely agree.

I tend more agnostic than atheist, I guess. I grew up Catholic, but more in a cultural sense, if that makes sense. I can remember from a very young age (like 4/5/6 years old) thinking "yeah ok whatever" when in CCD (religion classes) and confirmation classes. I still really enjoy the ceremony of a Catholic mass, but I can't really get behind the teachings.

I also grew up (and still live) in a place where a single religion is completely dominant, and that has just turned me completely off religion in general. For all the preaching of love thy neighbor and whatnot--it seems only to apply to those who share the same faith. I hate the feeling of being looked down upon simply because I don't belong to the religion. In that sense the super-religious are some of the most hypocritical people I've ever met. I just can't bring myself to do the same.

DH and I are very much atheists, but DH grew up in a very Catholic family, and I grew up in a protestant (United Church of Christ) church.

I was very involved in church - we went most Sundays, I participated in youth group and went to many mission trips around the country. I still very much appreciate and respect that church.

I specifically remembering the story of Jesus' crucifixion and not believing that he rose from the dead. It was so obvious to me - even at a very young age, that someone just stole Jesus' body. This doubt was always in the back of my mind, but church was fun for me and I could always (and still) get behind the "love thy neighbor" concept.

In college I read a lot. Specially, the book "The Evolution of God" kind of sealed the deal for me. Being human is hard, throughout all of mankind different religions have been created and evolved to help us deal with what we don't know. I don't have any reason to believe there is a god, and I'm comfortable knowing that I don't have all the answers.

My faith was everything to me, so much that I went to study theology at University. What I learned there changed everything. The rock I built my life on crumbled.

@Pumpkin Pie: That's just not true, and it's honestly kind of offensive, since it basically implies that I (and other professing atheists) don't really believe what I say I do. When we lost R, I wasn't praying that everything would turn out okay. I don't believe in a god, I don't believe in prayer, and I don't suddenly change my tune when things get bad.

My husband has never been religious, but the hypocrisy he's seen kept him from ever being interested. A lot of the people he grew up with are the party all the time but go to church on sunday types. Plus things like many religions' attitudes towards homosexuality. And he sees people like my family as very irrational. (When I went to the science museum with them, my stepmom explained to my younger siblings that the reason why the fossil record appears to support evolution is because Noah's flood rearranged all the fossils. That sort of thing is just too much.)

I was raised fundamentalist and am now a very strong atheist. Growing up, I was never, ever exposed to any other point of view, so I believed basically as a default. I was taught that atheists were willfully choosing not to believe even though they knew deep down that they were wrong, and I thought that was true. People of other religions were more just "misguided." But looking back, I never really believed it, not on any deep level. I just sort of assumed it was true, but there was no real emotional component, or that gut feeling that it was real. By high school I still "believed" but I was pro-gay rights (secretly, since my family did NOT approve) and that sort of thing.

Then around 19 or so, it just occurred to me to really think about the fact that I had been taught that if my little sister (then 5) grew up and was a wonderful person and devoted her whole life to helping others, but never "got saved" she would go to hell, but if Hitler had "asked Jesus in his heart" on his death bed he would go to Heaven. (I don't know why my sister and Hitler, they were just the examples that stuck.) I became really disillusioned with Christianity specifically, but since I had been taught evolution was wrong (and it didn't occur to me to question that for some reason) I explored other options. I got really into paganism for a bit.

And then I finally read The God Delusion, and realized that I didn't have to keep forcing myself to try and believe in some sort of higher power or god(s) or anything. It was the biggest relief I've ever felt. It was this huge weight off of me. I really don't even have words for how great it felt (and still does to this day) to realize that the evidence really did support there being no god, and it was OKAY. I don't miss any of it, and I would never want to go back.

ETA- Sorry to write you a novel. I'm always long-winded, and this is an issue that is very dear to me.

I grew up Catholic. Attended Catholic schools and churches. We were far more active when I was much younger and then we stopped going as often (not sure why!). I did a small bit of alter serving.

I stopped believe around the late middle school/early high school days. I can't really pin point my change of views. I like what some of the pp's have said, that I don't think I was every really religious. I just went along with the motions. Eventually, I learned too many things about Catholicism that just didn't add up, to me, and it made me start to explore other avenues of theisms.

I came to the conclusion that religion is a crutch (and crutches are fine as long as they aren't used to hit other people ), and I can't use a crutch. So, here I am, an Atheist.

My husband used to believe in God (but didn't like Him) and now I don't think he believes at all.

My husband grew up in a fundamentalist evangelical bible-literalist household, and they kept him pretty much in a bubble his whole life. The way he has explained it to me is that a classmate in his Christian high school's father got cancer and died. People kept saying things like "god only gives what you can handle" and "he works in mysterious ways" and that when my husband started to have major questions. He also started to realize that whether or not you are brought up in the church/believe in Christianity has a lot to do with where you are born- ie a child in China or India would have a far smaller chance of being "saved" than someone born in the US, and he thought the idea that an all loving god would orchestrate that didn't make any sense to him. Then he got a job in high school and was exposed to more points of view and mind sets, and just decided that the idea of most of his friends going to hell didn't sit well with him and the questions turned into just not believing
Now one of his major past times is reading religious literature and dissecting why organized religion as a whole doesn't make sense. I think it's his way of coping with the disappointment his parents have in him turning his back on Christianity.

I was never raised in a religious environment so his story is the only one applicable to the question but I will say that if I could believe I would in a heartbeat because I hate that his parents are caused any amount of pain or disappointment in our family not being "saved". I just really can't believe on any level that a god worth worshipping would come up with that as a solution for the worlds sin problems. I'm not trying to disrespect anyone I promise, i just have thought a lot about it wishing I has it in me and I can't remotely believe it.

@.twist.: I think for me the fact that I can't believe when I so badly would like to is my proof that the god of the bible doesn't exist (I'm definitely more agnostic because I'm not ruling out a god in general.) Why would he make up these rules for being saved and then also make people that genuinely do not have the ability to buy into it?

@Ra: I had a similar experience with kids in my youth group. I had a kid rag on me once for wearing black and asked me if I was a witch, worshipped Satan, etc. Kids dont learn that shit on their own...