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I would be happy to. As long as everyone has a healthy, respectful relationship!

If they contribute and we have a private (ish) space for them, I wouldn't mind for a little while. The end goal, though, would definitely be to get them to be independent!

My husband definitely wants to build on to our house for LO if she wants to. I'd be happy for her if she could make a way for herself and enjoy an independent life but not if that meant leaving the state. I would want to follow her! It also would totally depend on what she wants/the kind of person she develops into but I do want to help marry her off to the 'right' guy. I can't imagine living with her and a SonIL who I didn't like. Love my kid though. We could make it work!

I never really thought about this. I was/am fiercely independent- especially when it comes to my mom so I was out the door the movie it was feasible. I think I'd be so thrilled that my child wanted to live with me that it would sway my initial reaction. That being said, my ultimate goal is to help them to have happy, productive and independent lives (hopefully right down the street .)

@Mrs. Sketchbook: it would bother me if my kids couldn't take care of themselves and weren't on a solid path toward that. If they work hard and they still live with us just so save money or whatever that's fine as long as we have the space. It's common where I grew up (way before the recession.) but I did grow up in a very HCOL area.

I have been the kid who moved back in with her parents...I had just graduated from college at 25 years old and was pregnant with DD1. I didn't have a full time job yet and DH was offered a good position in our hometown so we jumped on it. We lived with my parents for well over a year and DD was born when we were there.

It worked for multiple reasons-We were living in a large basement room with a separate bathroom and entrance (almost like an in-law suite) so we had private space. We all enjoy each others company and my parents liked being really involved in DD's life. We were very grateful and demonstrated our appreciation by contributing in any way we could/ that my parents would allow- they refused to take money but we did a large majority of indoor/ outdoor chores and cooking, walking the dog, errands, etc. to lighten my parent's burden. Eventually I got a full time job and then later we moved an hour away. My parents, DH, and I all enjoyed the experience and we occasionally joke about buying a bigger house all together.

TL; DR- multi generational living is great.

@Mrs. Sketchbook: Yes! My grandma had that little apartment she moved into after all were raised and LO now has a grandma (my mom) in a little apartment!
eta: I moved out at 18 to the dorms and didn't boomerang. I am confident LO can do the same. But DH is more than happy to welcome his one and only ( girl ) back home in our codependent sanctuary.

I specifically remember my mom dropping me off at college and told me to do well because I could never live at home again. It's complicated but I think kids should have a safe place to land if needed

I don't think I would mind, assuming there are good reasons. It's an American cultural thing that people expect their kids to leave for college and never come home. In many cultures, it's accepted that young adults will continue to live at home and save money, until they married and want to move out. So if people don't marry, then they may never move out, haha...but everyone seems fine with it.

I moved out before college at 18 and never lived at home again. I also spent many years living pretty lean and wasn't able to save for about a decade, until after undergrad and grad school. My husband lived at home after undergrad and while he finished his masters and worked full time. And saved tons of money doing so.

I've never had a sibling live at home without good reason--only 2 of my 5 siblings ever "boomeranged". One got pregnant before marriage and lived at home as a single mom for a year or so. The other has severe mental illness and will never be able to live full independently.

I hope I can help my kids whenever they need it. I left home at 18 and ended up back home for a 5 month stint when I was 25 while I sorted out my life. I'm grateful that my family welcomed me home. Almost 2 years after my DH and I got married, we ended up at his parents for 9 months during a career change. Again, I'm grateful that they graciously allowed us to stay with them. One of my DH's brothers moved back home around age 30 in order to save money and invest in his business. He just recently moved out, but he never would have been able to grow his business like he did if it weren't for the savings he made while living with my ILs. I hope if my kids are living with me as adults, it's because they are using our home as a launch pad or safety net to regroup or move forward. Now, if they were just sitting around all day not doing anything to help themselves, it may be different.

This thread has gotten me so emo. I'm pretty sure it's because I'm sick and pmsing, but I've just never envisioned my little girl leaving the house before. Right now, I would not mind at all. She can stay with us for as long as she wants and I know DH feels the exact same way.

Of course, we will strive to teach her independence and responsibility. She's only 4 and we have a few years to go, but I know those years will fly by.

I hope that I teach my children how to take care of themselves well enough to not need to live at home post college. They will be welcome to come back home if the circumstances are necessary. It wouldn't be permanent, but we'll support them.

My brother stayed with my parents when he was taking the bar post graduate school and saving up for an engagement ring. I did summers during college at home, but once I got an apartment during grad school, I would only visit. I'm fiercely independent, so I struggled with my parents paying for my apartment two weeks into my job because my take home didn't cover it right away.

This subject is hard for me because my BIL has bommeranged, if not lived at home consistently since college. He attended a local college and lived at home working a minimum wage retail job. He has a degree, but continues to work a minimum wage job years later never advancing in his life. He refused years ago to go to graduate school because of the debt risk. I remember having a huge conversation with him about it. Student debt and interest rates aren't bad and aren't that negative of a debt because you're investing in yourself. He refused to see that and hasn't gotten an advanced degree or done anything to make himself more upwardly mobile as an employee or student. He moved for a couple of months and moved back home again. He's almost 32 and still in this endless loop. My MIL hates it, but enables him with it. He had a shot at a manager position at a restaurant, but it was "too much work" for him. He's my example of how not to have your kid live at home post college. His brother, DH, is completely different, hard worker, lived on his own or with girlfriends since 18-20 years old.

@SugarplumsMom: Haha me too. I have had some "conversations" with my son about growing up recently and he always says not to be silly, he'll always live with me.

My parents will never be empty nesters, I have a disabled brother that lives with them. They'd take us all into the house in a hot second if circumstances presented themselves. They live in a 2 family home though, with a full house on one side that would be available, so it's a fully separate space.

When my son is older, I hope we maintain two apartments and he's welcome in either one as long as he needs.

@Mrs. Sketchbook: Yeah, I think that the thread answers this way is because we all have hopes and dreams that our kids will be successful adults hoping that we raised them well. Seeing my BIL go through his 20's and now early 30's this way is so tough. He's so enabled that he doesn't know how to go beyond his current situation. He's had opportunities, but never seems to put himself out there for higher paying jobs. It doesn't help that my MIL has a very dark, cynical view of the place they live and its employment. So, he's got a lot of factors working against him. I don't know how sustainable it is for him to be living that way and for how long. I just don't want what's happening with him to happen to my kids.