Interesting article! #1 is a pet peeve of mine. You don't need to apologize if you've done nothing wrong!
Thoughts?
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A friend just sent this to me. I am guilty of a few of these (including #1, ugh, I'm sorry
) so I do need to be more cognizant of those.On a positive note, I have stop doing quite a few as I've grow up. In reference to #14, call me crazy all you want!
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@Dandelion: Oooh, #1 is a pet peeve of mine, too! And it's not just women who do this! I spent several years managing a team of rent arrears enforcement officers and I got so tired of hearing my team say "Sorry, I can't accept that offer" and "Unfortunately, we can't...." You're NOT sorry! It's NOT unfortunate! You *can* accept it, you're just not prepared to! OWN your decisions! Ugh! DH does this too - he says sorry BEFORE he does something!!! You are clearly not sorry, else you wouldn't do it!
I'm guilty of #2. I need to say no more often! I'm always over-comitting myself.
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Oooh.....considering I am maxing my vacation hours at work, this speaks to me haha. I took a half day Friday and am taking a whole day Monday. Even my boss is telling me to use it or lose it! I'm hoping we can go on a REAL vacation come May
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@Cherrybee: but the english LOVE the word sorry. As in....sometimes it's used in place of "pardon?", whereas Americans would say "what?" Or as an entrant to a conversation, "sorry, I couldn't help but overhear you...." And then there's the sarcastic sorry....lol.
My DH is Sri Lankan and a lot of his English is the British variety rather than the American variety, and now I always notice these things.
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I mostly don't do most of these but I'm big into the planning and web md-ing. Not gonna stop anything soon. Oh wellz.
I'm probably guilty of #1. It's so automatic. -
@Cherrybee: Yeah, saying sorry for something like that isn't good. It's like you're not confident enough to stand by what you are saying.
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@Anagram: OMG, everything you said there is SO true and I use all of those sorries! Especially the sarcastic sorry - like "Im sorry, am I boring you?" if DH yawns while Im speaking!
@Dandelion: Exactly!!
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This is great! I want to send it to some friends who sometimes need a reminder of how awesome they are and that they are worthy of not falling into these patterns/traps.
Thanks for posting!
ETA: I am definitely guilty of the Pinterest one and the social media one...gotta work on that! -
Guilty as charged for most of these.
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I fall victim to quite a few... The sorry-ing, the over- committing, Web md, toxic friends...
Thanks for sharing
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Yeah, I'm guilty of a bunch of these.
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I'm totally guilty of the Pinterest one.
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#6 success is a fluke...ugh I suffer from this!
#14 crazy is a fighting word...lol, guilty
Good list!
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I bet most, if not all, teachers on here are guilty of Pinterest envy.
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I get crap for doing the sorry thing, but in situations like where the person is telling me that they've been ill, or someone hit their car the other day, stuff like that. In those cases I think people need to back off - I'm trying to show them sympathy, no need to correct me over it!
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I'm guilty of #5 and #21.
I've embraced my crazy -
@Anagram: ahhh yes, I always say sorry instead of pardon when I'm struggling to hear.
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@wonderstruck: Saying "sorry for your loss" is totally fine. Or saying you're sorry for being hurtful. It's when you're not really sorry is when you shouldn't say it. Like, asking a special request at a restaurant or something. Or, like @Cherrybee: said, when you're at work, talking with people and doing business. When you say sorry in those situations, it kills your confidence. You gotta own it!
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@Dandelion: @wonderstruck: Yeah, its gotta be okay to say you're sorry in situations where you are sorry! I also tend to be the first to apologise if I have a disagreement with someone and we are both in the wrong. What we need to stop doing is apologising for our wants and needs. Like the example in the article - "Im so sorry to be a pain, please can you split the cheque for us" or "Im sorry, could I have more milk in that please" or "Im sorry to inconvenience you, can I return this faulty kettle". Why are you sorry?? You're not!! So why say it! You are important and its ok to have an opinion and to want certain things! That's what i think, anyway!
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@Dandelion: @Cherrybee: Yeah, I know what both of you mean. I just used to work with a bunch of guys who were jerks about it. For example, one of them would say that he was up all night with his puking kids and when I said sorry he snapped, "Why are you sorry? You didn't get my kids sick, it's stupid to say you're sorry!" Ummm because I'm trying to be nice and show empathy? Geez. But yeah, since this is the reaction I pretty much get from males I guess they do see it differently.
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@wonderstruck: He's a prat, then!
Sorry doesn't just mean regret, it also means pity/sympathy. In fact, I just checked the Oxford English dictionary online and pity is the first definition, regret is the second. You were completely right.
) so I do need to be more cognizant of those.
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