Hellobee Boards

Yes, I definitely feel you on this. I identify as Filipina-American (born and raised in the Midwest and California), but growing up I always had this feeling that I was "forever foreign." People would ask me where I was "really" from, commented on how my English had no accent, and other micro-aggressions that many Asian-Americans face on a frequent basis. While I hope that by living in a diverse area like San Diego my kids will be exposed to a diverse community of people; I know that these things still happen and I dread the day when I will have to explain to them why they are not viewed as a "typical American" but rather an "other."

I'm glad he confronted that woman. Like all bullies, she probably just expected to get away with it. Maybe she'll think twice about spouting that again.

I'm sad though how many seemingly normal people can have the ugliest beliefs. The last couple of years have really brought it out of the woodwork in my social circle.

Funny how a version of this (a lot less hostile, more on the ignorant spectrum) happened to me on an airplane today:

We were on a plane back home. I was sitting next to my 4 yo and my husband is in the row behind us. There was a white southern man sitting next to me. He was nice and all. My son was playing a race car game on his iPad (he never gets a chance to play games on iPad unless we were on a plane), and this man commented how good he was playing that game (and he really wasn't because he never played, and he always finished last place the whole 2 hours of the flight). I was like yeah (whatever).

When we landed and all of us were waiting to get off. The man turned to me and said, excuse me, are you Chinese? I hate strangers just asking me out of the blue on questions like that I said yes. He started asking, I am just curious. Are you taking your son back to China? I was like (wtf inside), eh, no, we live here and we are coming home. We were flying in from Toronto and not from an Asian country for crying out loud. Then he asked, so, your son was born here? I was like, yes? He then said, his neighbor who is Chinese took her son to China, and half the time she has her son, and the other half of the time her son is back to the States with the father. I got offended, and I was like, my husband is right behind us, right there (pointing to the back row, which he should have seen it as we passed things back and forth during the flight). He went, oh I mean, now his son is bilingual now and she utilized this amazing opportunity, and her son is as smart as your boy here now. I was like Okay. Good for her. And I was thinking, eh, how do you even know if my boy was "smart" just in this 2 hours of flight of him playing a race car game...?

I was offended with the whole thing because first, I am Chinese but NOT FROM CHINA. I am from Hong Kong. And 90% of people from Hong Kong gets offended when you ask us if we go back to China or anything related to China. That's just the political atmosphere and how the culture is right now. Then, what is with all those asking? And the ignorance of the conversation ? I would like to think it wasn't racist, and I take it as he is genuinely ignorant but I am still not even sure what he is trying to ask me about. I couldn't help but comment to my husband I think he probably votes for Trump

Anyhoo..... this just makes me think of what happened today.

This makes me so sad. I always think of NYC as a progressive place. If it happens so blatantly there, what is the rest of the country like?

I remember the time someone yelled "go back to where you belong". I was 16, crossing a parking lot at an Asian grocery store at an Asian part of town. The guy that yelled it was driving a yellow BMW convertible ... he was middle eastern! Idiocy comes in all forms. I'm from Southern Cali.

@catlady: Yeah, I agree with you... but since the election, I feel like the progress we've done has stopped or gone backwards.

It might be more media exposure but some Trump supporters now feel like they can say what they want.

Ugh, this is depressing. I used to live in NYC and probably about four years ago I overheard a (perfectly able-bodied, probably in her 40s) woman laying into this guy as we were getting off the subway for not giving her his seat (which, why should he just because she's a woman, but I digress). Anyway, she said really nastily, "in AMERICA men get up for women to sit down" and then stalked off. The guy looked to be of Indian descent. I said, "wow, that was really rude." And he just looked defeated and said, "I'm an American, too." I said, "I know, I'm sorry." I didn't know what else to say. I was shocked by that, it was obviously very memorable. Now I'm worried it'll become more commonplace