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@periwinklebee: Well I am starting to feel very anxious. My intuition is telling me that I am pregnant and even thinking about that possibility is so nerve-wracking.
Part of me wants to live in the bliss of the TWW a bit longer and the other part of me wants to know ASAP so I can mentally prepare.
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@mrskansas: yeah, the eternal TTC dilemma. I decided this month I should at least give it a try waiting until AF is due - it will be a first if I make it until then, hah hah.
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@periwinklebee: It's so hard! I know you mentioned in the other thread that your HCG isn't back to 0 yet. Are you still getting faint lines on tests or is it low enough that it's not registering?
I think you said previously that it was 8? -
@mrskansas: I haven't bothered to POAS since about a week and a half ago, when there was definitely still a visible line. I figure if my period doesn't come this month, I'll almost certainly have to go in for a blood test and then an early ultrasound to make sure there's a sac and not molar tissue. The possibility of driving myself crazy over whether a squinter is real or leftover hcg is hopefully the extra incentive I need not to test early
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@periwinklebee: Yes in that case I would wait to test too!
They need to make an HCG test that's similar to what diabetics use to test their blood. Instant results.Oh and a pocket ultrasound machine.
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I've spent the past hour going through all the old POAS threads to see when everyone got their BFP.
Help me. -
@mrskansas: I do the same thing during the TWW, so I have no good advice except sheer force of willpower. Find a distraction. Or meditate for a few minutes.
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@dominobee: I'm at work so you would think that would be enough of a distraction! Haha. But nope.
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@mrskansas: I get no work done during the TWW. Or I just have to stay late because of the hour or two I spent screwing around googling symptoms. LOL.
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@dominobee: HA - I know the feeling. Luckily I work my 40 hours and that's it, I don't really have any deadlines.
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@mrskansas: I think with an hcg of 8 (or lower) it probably wouldn't give a squinter but I'm just over it at this point. Too many BFNs when I wanted a BFP, and too many positive tests when I wanted it to be negative - i really hate hpts. I would love to shorten the TWW by knowing that I'm out sooner, but if it's ambiguous that will be worse...I was feeling pretty shitty about the TWW yesterday but had a good cry last night about how frustrated I feel and worried that it will take a long time to get pregnant again, and am feeling better for the moment...
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@periwinklebee: Yeah HPTs sucks. At this point I've had more positives that I wish were negative than the other way around!
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@mrskansas:
I'm not sure what was harder for me, the loss or the string of bfns. I'm so glad that I have a lot of other things to appreciate and be grateful for. TTC has taken so much emotional energy... and there's still a long ways to go, so trying (key word, maybe not that successfully) to pace myself...
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@periwinklebee: I'm so hoping it happens for you quickly!
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Sitting at work & thinking about my daughter turning 2 in a week and trying so hard not to cry. Ugh.
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If my hcg is negative before my next period, which hopefully it will be, then we will do an hsg and day 3 testing next cycle. I wasn't sure if I would need the hsg since obviously both my tubes aren't blocked, but it could be that one is obstructed so we want to rule that out. I doubt we'll find much - nothing seems obviously wrong and my RE says the majority of patients are diagnosed as unexplained - but it's still nice to have some sort of plan. I assume afterwards we will also discuss how long we want to try on our own before giving clomid a try, and I think it will be good to have that end date in mind and know that if it gets to that point we'll try something new.
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@mrskansas: Thanks
And I'm hoping that the crying is a symptom. That's an hcg dead give away for me 
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@periwinklebee: You tried for 6 months before you got pregnant, correct?
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@mrskansas: yeah, I feel like it's kind of right on the border. It could be everything is completely fine and we just were unlucky, or it could be that there are issues and we got lucky that it happened so fast...
I'm 34 - obviously I don't want unnecessary interventions but also don't want to be too laissez-faire about it given my age.
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@periwinklebee: Yeah I understand that. It never hurts to get checked out especially if they find something that is an easy fix. With TTC, knowledge is power!
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@dominobee: @mrskansas: I started to purposely sit near co-workers vs my own office when I have things to do because otherwise I'll spend time browsing the web on TTC. This way, I'm forced to not look things up since my colleagues are around.
But then I use my phone.
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Does this look like it's getting lighter? Top is today with FMU and bottom is tonight with a short hold.
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@mrskansas: I dunno if it's the shadow overhead, but the bottom doesn't look lighter to me. Maybe compare FMU to FMU?
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@madisonbee: yeah the same shadow was over both but I thought the bottom was darker too.
Maybe it's just turning into a true positive at only 8 dpo -
@mrskansas: Hate to be an enabler, but it looks darker... Giiiiirlllllllll
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@mrskansas: So, are you still trying to test out the trigger or are you hoping it's your BFP? Sorry, it sounds like a lame question, but I've read other bees with triggers before and testing and it was confusing to me.
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@madisonbee: well I'm still testing out the trigger. I can't imagine getting a true BFP at 8 dpo. It's just annoying that it looks about the same from this morning!
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@mrskansas: That's what I figured! I hope you have a ton of those cheapies because I'd be using them up if I were you. I know that doesn't help!
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@madisonbee: I do, thank goodness!
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@knittylady: ughhh I know. Definitely not hopeful until I'm like 12 weeks though, lol
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@mrskansas: Mrstal just posted a thread about this... Can you line em all up like she did?? #addict
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@knittylady: I haven't been keeping the tests. My husband is freaked out by it, haha
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@mrskansas: Is it wet in the picture above? They usually dry even darker... I'd be interested to see that. Because I'm even weird about other people's tests...
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I have a dresser drawer full of open boxes of Clear Blue, FRER, dollar tree tests, etc.
DH wanted me to clear out the dresser drawers so we can move it to a different room. I waited for him to go to the bathroom, grabbed the drawer full of HPTs and put it all in a plastic bag.....and ran next door and dumped it in our neighbor's trash bin.
He's seen how much they are in the store, so he would've lost his shit if he physically saw how many of those I bought since we started TTC.
#worstneighborever
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@madisonbee: Hhaha hopefully it doesn't get your neighbor in trouble!!
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@knittylady: I know....I feel like shit. Lol.
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@knittylady: this is totally dried
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@madisonbee: hahaha that is the best thing I've heard in a while
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@mrskansas: Um..... !
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@knittylady: it'll probably be stark white in the morning!! I'll test and let you know what happens
I'm not sure what was harder for me, the loss or the string of bfns. I'm so glad that I have a lot of other things to appreciate and be grateful for. TTC has taken so much emotional energy... and there's still a long ways to go, so trying (key word, maybe not that successfully) to pace myself...
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