Hellobee Boards

My oldest really needs them to wind down. Lately though I've told him he can lose a story for bad behavior (he usually gets three). I give him the chance to earn one back.

Sending him to bed with no stories would be a disaster since he really needs routine. But each kid is different. My 18 mo couldn't care less about stories before bed.

We read two books before bed every night. If my daughter is having trouble cooperating through the rest of the routine (Jammies, teeth, etc), then we only have time for one book. This has only happened maybe twice, she usually pulls it together if we give her a warning about "running out of time."
We read books a lot during the day, so I don't feel bad about this. I literally read books for an hour and 45 minutes tonight, in two sittings. And we went to story time in the morning.

We read a book most nights, sometimes two if I'm not totally shattered! He puts himself to sleep so much better after reading so it's usually worth it. We do a LOT of reading during the day but he still loves his special bedtime stories that don't come out during the day. Some nights he is tired enough to go down without a book & I oblige! But when he's keen I give in because it takes not that long in the grand scheme of life...and he'll shriek himself to bed instead which is no fun for anyone!

She can lose books, but I usually will at least read one to give her the wind down. I've been really tempted to not do them at all. And when Dh is home she can choose which one of us does teeth and who does stories- she always wants me to do stories so it can be used as a threat if she's being a pain with her teeth (if you don't let daddy brush them then mommy can't read stories). But I always do at least one.

That said, I once withheld vegetables because she was being a pain. She really wanted this bell pepper at the grocery store, then she wouldn't climb the stairs so I said she couldn't have the pepper if she didn't climb quickly. She didn't so I wouldn't give it to her- that felt like bad parenting.

Reading is routine, but these days, based on how late it is and sometimes behavior, we increase/limit the # of books. It definitely is a strong motivator and at times, I do feel bad about using it a tangible reward since overall, I want the kids to love reading bc reading is just plain awesome

We do a lot of reading at night. 3 books in our room, 2 in hers. The books in our room are the first to go wake she's being bad. Yeah, I hate taking books from her but she loves them so it's also a good punishment.

@Foodnerd81: I see I'm not the only one who has use a green pepper as a bribe. Weird kids.

@mediagirl: @Foodnerd81: Do your LOs also only like bell peppers because of Daniel Tiger?
@Ree723: I think this was perfectly reasonable parenting. You didn't say "I won't read to you because you're a horrible threenager," you said, "we only have time for books if you clean up." Then you followed through. Way to go!

@MrsSRS: thank you Daniel Tiger!! Yes it's totally that episode. That night she ate the entire yellow pepper saying Yummy yummy!

It's part of our routine, but we've also taken them away for the night when he's seriously not behaving (after a few warnings). He hates it, so we talk about how "we'll read tomorrow night when you behave like a big boy and listen to mommy..."

I'm always torn about it, because he loves reading, but he loves reading so it's effecting...

routine.
I'm a teacher, and there is SO much research to support this as early literacy learning. YOU are your childs first teacher. Reading together allows your child to see reading as a pleasure not a chore, exposes them to well known stories ingrained in our culture, allows them to make connections between the book and their lives, and so many other things that will help them have an easier time at school. PLEASE make it routine! I've had students who have NEVER been read to at home, and you CAN see the difference.

A must, not a privilege.

Both a privilege and routine. DD gets stories every night as long as she goes to her room without fighting. If she fights then that takes time that we could be reading

Honestly, I feel bad, it's not a privilege, but lately it's been getting forgotten a lot. We need to get back into a routine of reading every night, but right now, our girls have a bedtime dance they made up, that they like to do instead, haha!

I think they are both. The vast majority of the time, like 98%, they are routine. But they can be taken away in the case of really bad behavior.

Privilege and I tell my son this on a regular basis. Sometimes we have to skip it because of time constraints but I am not above skipping it for poor choices.

Mostly routine, but we read during the day too, so if it's a particularly late night or whatever, we have occasionally skipped or dramatically shortened the evening reading time. He's a master foot-dragger at night, so I have been making an effort lately to make sure we get in plenty of reading at other times so that I don't feel bad about closing the book a little sooner right before bed.

I maintain my cool about reading at night in the face of lousy behavior during the day by picking a book I want to read.

Routine but if she is throwing a fit because we saw it is bedtime, we threat no stories. Usually it works to calm her down. But there have been nights when she doesn't get any.

Routine! It helps both of my boys wind down for bed. We are presently stuck on reading the little engine that could.

Yea, both! Time and behaviour (which affects time) play a role too. I'm not going to read him a book 10 minutes after bedtime because he wasn't listening to me.

It's part of our routine, but if, for whatever reason, our routine is messed up, he may miss out. He doesn't like that though so we don't usually have to skip it.