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They are hard for my mom since she lost her mom. And it was/is hard for me as her daughter... I think for awhile her depression over it made me feel like I wasn't... enough? Like she lost her mom, but the family she did have wasn't enough to keep her afloat.
It wasn't until a year had passed that she started getting better and now I think she does enjoy the holidays because she has learned to be thankful for what she has... and she had six children, three children-in-laws and four grandchildren. But it is hard, even as the side-person watching her struggle with the loss. I couldn't imagine life without my mom at this point.

I'm so sorry you're going through this I hope you can remember to find joy in the holidays, but it is OK to be sad. So let yourself be sad.

I'm so sorry that your mom won't be here to celebrate this year. Hugs. The holidays are hard for us too but for different reasons.

I'm so sorry about your Mom @Pepper: I can see how the holidays would difficult this year.

My DH's brother died right before Christmas last year and I'm sort of dreading the holidays this year. It's hard to support DH since he doesn't really like to talk about things. I'm sure it will be a tough holiday season.

@Pepper: I'm so sorry about your mama. ((hugs))

Our first holidays without my aunt & nono were hard. My nana even stayed home, so not having her there, either, made it even harder. I wish I had some advice

@Pepper: I'm so sorry for the loss of your mom. It will be NY second holiday without my mom. She passed away a couple days after Thanksgiving unexpectedly and the holidays are so so hard. She was always the one hosting dinners and loved the holidays and now they feel empty and lost without her.
The one tip I can offer you is try to focus on your lo and focus on it being their first Xmas, thanksgiving to get you through. That's what I did the first year without my mom as it was my sons first holiday. It was hard though. It still unbearbly hard but focusing on p helped me smile a little bit on the holidays.
My heart goes out to you.

Sending you love and hugs I've been thinking about you!

@Pepper: I feel you. This is the second holiday season after losing my mom to ALS and it will be LOs first holiday, too. Last year was hard. But this year, like you said with LO experiencing everything for the first time, it seems even harder and definitely bitter sweet. He was crying the other day as I was driving us home and I started singing Christmas songs to him. I started singing Frosty the Snowman and got choked up halfway through and just bawled because that was OUR song during Christmas sing alongs and it hit me that I would never share all of those little holiday traditions between us with her again, but I could pass them on to LO. Oh, boy. It's tough. I'm sorry you're going through it, too

@Pepper: I am so sorry for your loss. I don't have direct experience with losing a parent but I have friends who have found things to do to help remember/feel that their loved one is present in some way. Maybe playing a favorite song or putting a christmas trinket that was a favorite in a prominent place, or making a favorite dish of hers? My mom lost her dad over 10 years ago and we still have shrimp at lots of occasions because "he would have liked it".

The holidays have gotten more complicated for us due to family health issues and increased distance between my brother and I as DH and I have started a family and he and his wife continue to be DINKs and there is just not much in common.

I am going into this year trying to give myself permission to feel my feelings, basic as that sounds, and to relax and let go of things having to be a certain way. I don't know if those might be helpful ideas for you too...

@Pepper: is this your first one after her passing?
The first one is always the hardest but I promise each subsequent one gets a little easier. Having a LO to celebrate with is also a great distraction and a great way to remember that the holidays are also full of joy.

My BIL passed away suddenly 3 weeks before Christmas at the young age of 34. It will be 3 years of his passing in a few weeks. The first Christmas was so unbelievably hard. My ILs were still in GA at that point and we had no little one. DH & I flew down there for Christmas so we could all be together and get through it together with family.

I hope your LO helps ease the pain a little. Hoping you have family nearby to remember fondly of holidays past with your mom. (((hugs)))

big tight hugs!!! So sorry to hear.

<3. They are hard. They've been hard ever since my brother passed away. As time goes on, they get less difficult because I find happier things to focus on. This year will be hard because my grandmother passed away last week.

Holidays just make you miss your loved ones

@Pepper: same here. Since my Dad passed away the holidays are very bittersweet.

Personally I just try and talk about my Dad and remember all the things that he loved during the holidays or that he would do during the holidays. It makes me feel better to talk about him even if it might make me tear up.