Hi, Chinese and Vietnamese is my two native languages; English is my third language, so I apologize for my not perfect English grammars. And the LONGGG post ahead, so please skip it if you don't have a few minutes to spare.
I know everyone time is precious, so I'm not expecting anyone to reply to my Vent/Dear Diary post. But if you can help, help answer the paragraph below and just skip the rest.
I was wondering, did you/do you save money for your baby college? If so, may I ask how much do you save a month? And was it save for public college or private college?
For baby college, how much do you need to save a month for public college? (Me and my husband we not rich; and private college is very expensive, I don't think we can afford private college).
How much is the usual amount needed to save a month for public college? Did you start saving it when your baby was a newborn? Did you specificly open the 529 college saving plan account to save for your baby college?
Or you just put the money in a regular 'saving' account and take it out later when baby go to college?

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Me and my husband we both Debt-free, zero debt. No school debt, No credit-cards debt.. We far far from rich. But we to Debt-free, and we both are not big spender; life is comfy for us.
We pay all our credit cards bills early every month. Once we get the bills, we pay it right away; so our credit scores is excellent.
Everything, including our bills are all pay on time early every month.

My husband very responsible with money, he work hard to secure for the future. He always make sure we have decent amount in saving accounts. He save for emergency/rainy days.
Every month we put money into retirement, and into our regular saving accounts. We do have our retirement saving.
We live BELOW our means.. To me, it is important that we must keep on continue saving money for rainy days. Eventhough we have decent money in saving already, but we still must keep on saving (especially we live in a HCOL state).

I'm very frugal. I'm a coupon person; I cut coupons, I save coupons, I use coupons.
All my clothes/shoes I buy are 'on sale' price. I shop in the on sale section/clearance section. When the holidays come and clothes goes on sale, I buy alot and save it to wear next season. I'm cheap like that.
My whole life I never own anything brand name. I don't need and don't like brand name stuff.
I don't wear make up, I never wear powder or liquid foundation on my face skin. I never get my nails done, I don't paint my nails. I never dyed or hightlights my hair, never get my hair done.. When my hair get too long; I just go for a dry cut, no shampooo no nothing. I save every dollar as I can.

Never once I ask my husband to buy me anything. I never ask my husband for anything.. Everything he did for me/all the things he buy for me; he did it all out of his own willing.
He knows all my life I'm frugal, but he still give me money everytime he gets pay (this is something I just don't understand). He said it my monthly 'spending money', spend it--use it on anything I want, go shopping and buy things for myself. He said he give it to me, it is mine.
But I don't want to spend his hardwork money, plus I'm a very frugal person.
I haven't use a penny of it, I open an addition saving account and put it all in there. Save it for our future baby expense, or save it for baby college, or save it for my husband; I just don't want to use it for myself.
I told him he can have it back any time he wants, but he just wont' take it back. He said I'm silly, and he said he will never take it back.. So that leave me with the only option of keep continue saving it.

Eversince I married him, he gives me money eversince and still giving me money. I know he wants to see me well taken care of, I'm grateful for that. But I have a minium wage job--it $10 an hour California minimum wage, but a job is sill a job. I have my own source of income.
I know he make 4x more than me. But he really doesn't need to give me money, especially when he secure everything already.
He already secure everything from emotionally to financially, so I can live a stable steady and comfy life. He really doesn't needs to give me money.

He have a full time job that pay weekly, and a part time job that pay bi-weekly; so he gets pay six times a month.. And he gives me money every.single.time he gets pay. Each time he gets pay he always give me $200 to $300; he give me that amount but six times a month--so times six, it does add up quickly. (It alot of money he gives me, he really doesn't have to do this).
The months he work more like holidays (Thanksgiving and Christmas), or whenever he work overtime; he gives me more money.

There twelve months a year; the amount he gives me each month times twelves. It does add up.
(it probably not be alot to others; But I'm just a girl who work minimum wage jobs all my life, to me it alot of money).
I told him many times to not give me money anymore. But he still insist on give me and said he 'wants' to.
I told him straight out that I put it in the saving account, I don't want to use it for myself. I will save it for our future baby; when the baby comes this money can be spend on the baby--use it for baby expense, Or save it for baby college. At least this is something me as a mom I can do for my baby.
I told my husband that don't give me money anymore, but he keeps on insists that he 'wants' to give it to me. How can I make him understand that I don't want him to give me money everytime he get pays? How to word it to him to make him understand? Since he keeps on insist giving me money, I guess I don't have any other choice besides continue put the money in the saving account.

We got married 15 months ago, eversince I became his wife he gives me money eversince and still giving me money.
I still haven't use a penny of it. I have been saving it for 15 months already, and I will continue keep saving it.
I'm a girl with just a High School diploma (No college degree). So I don't know much about University/College-tuition, but I heard that the tuition will keep increase and increase.
So how much do I need to save to reach baby college goal? Would I have enough for baby college (public college) If I continue saving it for the next 18 years?
I haven't use a penny of it, and will never use a penny of it. It all still in the saving account.

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My husband he from Sierra Leone, West Africa. He Black.
Nope, he not African-American. He come straight from Africa.
He not mix, he FULLY African. He much darker skin than most of African-American here in the U.S.. He Not brown, Not even dark brown. He the dark chocolate black skin tone.

My Vietnamese mother discriminate against him, and disrespect him.. My parents disapproved my husband, they didn't accept him and still haven't accept him. My mother make it loud and clear that if I married him, she will disown me. And she did, she completely cut me off after I got married.
(Chose to married him, means my parents will completely cut me off and disown me; my mother basically force me to chose.)
Both my parents refused to give me their blessing, both refused to show up to my wedding ceremony.. Even till this day my parents still haven't accept my husband nor accept my marriage.

He was very keen on get married, (I wasn't pregnant when we married).
He said he loves me, he wants to married me. He was very keen on tied the knot, I agree to married him. And I just want to get married very simple, I don't need anything.
I didn't have an engagement ring. It was me that specificly said I don't want an engagement ring.
I married him with nothing.. There was No engagement ring. No wedding reception. No honeymoon. I didn't even get to wear a wedding dress, no wedding cake, nothing.
In all fairness to him.. It was "me" that chose Not to have any of that.
And I didn't want a wedding reception. Because frankly, there was No point of me to have a wedding reception when there nobody on my side of the family going to show up.. I asked myself, what's the point of have a wedding reception when nobody on the bride side of the family going to show up?

There no engagement ring.. But we do have our wedding rings, our simple plain matching wedding band.
And these simple plain gold wedding band is all we have. We didn't buy any new rings, we use these simple matching gold band rings that we both been wearing, turn it to our wedding rings on that day we got married.
There No engagement ring. No wedding reception. No honeymoon. I didn't even get to wear a wedding dress.. But No regrets, I have zero regrets. If I can go back in time, I married him this exact same way again; I wouldn't change a thing.

He treats me really really well, he is an awesome husband.. Marriage have been loving and peaceful; very peaceful, we don't even fight or argue.
I just don't understand why he keeps give me money everytime he get pays. I know he said he 'wants' to. But can it be that he try to make it up for me?
Married him, it result in my parents disown me. Perhaps he feels sad for me, so he wants to make it up for me?
Or perhaps he knows that all my life I work at minimum wage jobs, he feels pity for me so he wants to make it up for me?

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I have known him for 5 years, and NEVER once my mom care enough to met him.
Even till this day she still doesn't care to meet him, not even one time. To me this is like an indirect slap in his face to let him know how much my mother dislike him and disrespect him.
She very very unreasonable. NEVER once she care enough to give one single chance to met him. She doesn't even care enough to know his name, or anything about him other than his ethnicity.
She said alot of hurtful words. And disrespect him when she never met him before, not even once. How fair is that to him?

My husband knows all about my mother disapproved him, discriminate against him and disrespect him.
He knows everything. He doesn't care that my mother discriminate against him.
He knows everything about me, and accepted everything about me.. He accepted that this is our situation/circumstances. He face the situation and make the best out of it.

There No hate in his heart, there No resentment.. Never once I heard him say a word criticize my mother. Never once I heard him say a disrespectful word, a negative word or a bad word about my mother. Never once he complain a word about our situation/circumstances.
But then he never complain anyways. I Never heard him complain a word about his life, his jobs or anything life throw at him.. He said complain won't change anything. Don't run away, face the situation and make the best out of it.

I always blame myself that he doesn't have a MIL. I blame myself that my mother disrespect him. It self-blame, self-guilt that I live with inside everyday.
But a lady gave me advice--she said most men don't care about having MIL, they're fine with not having a MIL.. And she sure that my husband rather not have a MIL than have to deal with my mom (a MIL who discriminate and disrespect him).
She said my mom never want to met him, refused to met him, doesn't want to be his MIL. Take it as a blessing. Because my husband doesn't have to deal with the stress of dealing with a MIL who like my mom anyways.
I dunno, but I always blame and blame myself that I can't give my husband a MIL.

Anyways, my husband is the only guy I've ever been with, he is my first everything.. Everything I know about men love and marriage is all from him. Sometimes I wonder is the things he do normal? Or why he keeps do the things he do, like why he keeps give me money every time he get pays, etc..

I have known him 5 years. But the first 2 years we were 'just friends'. I didn't agree to be his GF until after 2 years of knowing him.
I'm the girl in his neighborhood. Due to our close distance, seeing each others day in and day out; It not hard to get to know him well.
He said he wait for me, and he did what he said. After 2 years I agree to be his GF, then I make him wait another year into our commited relationship before I sleep with him; I want to make sure he the right one, and make sure I was ready.
So the first 3 years, there no sex between us.. I first sleep with him in 2014 (so sexually, it only been 2 years).
We got married on February 2015 (so it 15 months into marriage).
I don't know why he loves me, or why he wait for me? Why chose me--a girl in his neighborhood to married?

He didn't give me money when I was his GF in our committed relationship. He didn't do this when we live together (we did live together prior to marriage; but it wasn't long, just under half a year).
BUT after we "officially" got married--I became his wife; he begin to give me money everytime he get pays. And he still give me money.
I'm just wondering why he do the things he do. I'm still trying to find out why he keeps insist on give me money, when he already secure everything from emotionally to financially. I live a stable steady and comfy life. I don't need him to give me money.

I don't know why he loves me, or what did I to to deserve him. I blame myself all the time that I can't give him a MIL.
I blame myself that I can't give him the perfect family with a MIL (a MIL that discriminate against him, a MIL that welcome him and accept him).
And I blame myself that I can't give my future children a maternal grandma. My mother did make it clear that I'm not welcome to drive back home to visit my dad anymore, and my future children are also not welcome. She doesn't want anything to do with me, or anything with my children.
And it beep hurts that my mom called me Dirty, and also called my future children dirty. According to her words, my future children are equally "Dirty" and shameful just like me--their mom.
It beep hurts, it just hurts so much.. I don't know if this lifetime/if until the day I died--IF I'm able to see my mother change her mind and accept my husband, or accept my marriage; and stop called me dirty, stop called my future children dirty.