Dr's Office: Ok - I sent you the requisition for DH to get his SA done. Call the place and book an appointment. He has to abstain from sex for 2-7 days, so that means no hand jobs or anything ok?
Me: Dying of laughter.

hang up and call the lab to book an appt for him..
Lab: Ok so no sex for 2-7 days, GIRL, we want him to be HAPPY!!
Me: Almost peeing my pants with laughter.

Glad that there is humour in these situations!