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Beyond Miscarriage Support

  1. travellingbee

    hostess / papaya / 10219 posts

    @NurseDMB: oh no... I'm sorry to hear it.

  2. NurseDMB

    kiwi / 643 posts

    Thank you ladies. ❤

  3. travellingbee

    hostess / papaya / 10219 posts

    Frustrated. I talked with the nurse at the RE and she said that we will have to wait a full cycle in between before we can move forward with IF treatment and the hysteroscopy. I was hoping we could at least get that out of the way. But no. Ugh. This is throwing everything off so much. I'm so, so angry that this happened now.

  4. jaguar

    pomegranate / 3764 posts

    @travellingbee: No tampons after miscarriages, that's what I got told both times. Horrible, surfboard pads. Urgh. I hope it's not ectopic, hon, but I have a feeling it won't be. My last hcg went up in small spurts before it dropped quickly. 60 to 86 to 90 to 76.5 and then >>> from there. *hugs*

    @travellingbee: Also.... yep. I'm currently CD1 (or will be tomorrow, depending on what this spotting does) and we have to take this cycle off as a REST cycle after the failed IVF with no transfer. This AFTER waiting after the miscarriage, and the one before that. So bloody cross.

    @2PeasinaPod: Big hugs to you, lovely. The waiting can kiss my very wobbly bum. xxx

    @MaryM: I'm sorry you're feeling that way - it's hard not to have the same page, and being in that in between stage of fertility is tough. We have never, ever had the relaxed 'let's just try for a baby' spontaneous sex. Sounds sad, but we haven't. It's been all charting and temping and O-ing (or lack thereof) since we got married. Breaks my heart just a little bit.

    @NurseDMB: I'm sorry to hear about the current loss. Did your betas go very high?

  5. BlueWolverine

    pear / 1510 posts

    @travellingbee: That's awful that you have to wait. Not only are you having a very early miscarriage, you have to wait to move on. It's adding insult to injury in the worst way. I'm so sorry.

    The bleeding picked up for me today as well. I was glad to see the pad advice, I wondered about that. Mine is going in cycles right now - lots, then a little, then lots. It's not what expected.

  6. jaguar

    pomegranate / 3764 posts

    @BlueWolverine: Yeah, stick with the awful pads. Thinking of you.

  7. travellingbee

    hostess / papaya / 10219 posts

    Awake with horrible cramping. Light bleeding only still, though.

    ETA: nevermind- bleeding now...

  8. HappyBluebird

    clementine / 957 posts

    @BlueWolverine: @travellingbee: hoping this is over for both of you soon, thinking of you both

  9. BlueWolverine

    pear / 1510 posts

    @travellingbee: Yeah, the cramping is pretty awful. Yesterday I thought I would go into work today (it's just a heavy period, right?) but with the cramping and the need to be close to the restroom, my butt is on the couch today. I hope it goes quickly for us both. Sigh.

    @HappyBluebird: Thank you. Your (and all the bees') support is comforting.

  10. travellingbee

    hostess / papaya / 10219 posts

    My HCG is now at a 4.9 so things are progressing very quickly. I'm so relieved.

  11. ValentineMommy

    pomelo / 5791 posts

    Hi all! Just stopping in to say I'm still here and alive, just been going through a lot lately.

    @BlueWolverine: @travellingbee: I hope things move along quickly for both of you so you can move on with life. Hugs and prayers!

  12. NurseDMB

    kiwi / 643 posts

    @jaguar: Thank you. When I first had my beta done at 12dpo, it was only 22. They were concerned about a chemical pregnancy at that point, but my numbers continued to double, although they were still on the low side for where I should have been based on LMP (although I was probably a week off based on ovulation) At 20dpo on Wednesday my hcg was 480, and we had an ultrasound scheduled for next week. But I started to cramp and then bleed bright red yesterday morning. My hcg yesterday dropped back down to 22, and they want me to come back on Monday to make sure they're still dropping.

    Emotionally I think my husband is taking it harder. I am sad and have moments were I cry, but it's so weird because I was in limbo for the past week that I almost feel relieved. I did not have that "maternal instinct" that I had when I was pregnant with my son - it was really odd. It was almost like I knew it wasn't a viable pregnancy the entire time and I was just waiting to miscarry. I am terrified to try again though

  13. NurseDMB

    kiwi / 643 posts

    @travellingbee: I hear you on the relieved feeling. I was concerned about ectopic, so when the nurse called me and told me they had dropped significantly, I felt so much relief. But it's still so hard. I'm sorry you have to go through this.

  14. travellingbee

    hostess / papaya / 10219 posts

    @NurseDMB: You too. It's a very hard thing...

  15. ValentineMommy

    pomelo / 5791 posts

    @NurseDMB: Somehow I missed you! I'm so sorry you are going through this as well. I hope that it ends quickly for you and you can find peace and move on soon. As for trying again, it's REALLY scary. I was not prepared for the emotions that have come up since TTC again. I'm typically very anxious, but this is a whole new level.

  16. NurseDMB

    kiwi / 643 posts

    @ValentineMommy: Thank you. DH wants to start trying again right away, but I'm more hesitant. I'm also a worrier and anxious person anyway, so I feel like next time around I'm going to be a nervous wreck.

  17. BlueWolverine

    pear / 1510 posts

    @NurseDMB: I hear you on the lack of maternal instinct aspect. My BFP was so late and the lines never got darker - I think I knew this wasn't real. I'm sad, but mostly frustrated that we now have to TTC again. This was month five and I'm ready to just get on with it. I know there are women who try for a lot longer, so I'm trying not to get too annoyed. It only took 3 months for DD, so this is new territory for me.

  18. NurseDMB

    kiwi / 643 posts

    @BlueWolverine: I hear you. I'm so scared of it happening again. How old is your DD?

  19. 2PeasinaPod

    pomelo / 5524 posts

    @travellingbee: The waiting sucks. And @jaguar: it can kiss my wobbly bum too!!

    @NurseDMB: @BlueWolverine: I think one of the hardest parts after a miscarriage is the worry and stress that it will happen again. I don't think I went into a single appointment without that worry in the back of my mind...even with LO until he was here.

  20. hilsy85

    squash / 13764 posts

    @travellingbee: that's great (wrong word, but I hope you understand my sentiment!). I hope this passes for you quickly and you guys are able to move on to next steps asap!

  21. BlueWolverine

    pear / 1510 posts

    @NurseDMB: DD is 22 months. She's so awesome. Even last night, when I was feeling like crap, she could make me laugh and smile. We'll start trying again immediately. I wouldn't be surprised if my age was factor in all this (I'm 39) and I'm not getting any younger. I actually think that DD makes me more confident that things will be OK next time. My body has done this before, so we'll get it right again. A friend said something that resonated with me (though I know it may not with everyone): this is just my body doing what it should. There was something not right and now my body is taking care of it and getting ready to offer hopeful new baby a safe place to grow.

  22. jaguar

    pomegranate / 3764 posts

    @2PeasinaPod: Just know we're here whenever you need us! We can wait with you! xxx

    @NurseDMB: It's crappy having to even think about trying again. I just constantly feel so ripped off to get a tease, a positive test, the symptoms... and then get punched in the guts and have it taken away.

    @BlueWolverine: @travellingbee: I hope you guys are looking after yourselves. Lots of chocolate and cuddles. x

    @travellingbee: Hope you're doing ok.

  23. jaguar

    pomegranate / 3764 posts

    It's cycle day 2 here for me... so Letrozole started this morning (2-6). Not that I get to DO anything with it, but FS says this will hopefully at least get me to ovulate and have a regular length cycle.

    I'm so frustrated and full of rage right now, it's not even funny. I need to take up knitting or something.

  24. HappyBluebird

    clementine / 957 posts

    @jaguar: I definitely suggest taking up a craft, I crochet and it helps take my mind off things temporarily

  25. ValentineMommy

    pomelo / 5791 posts

    @HappyBluebird: @jaguar: I totally agree. A new hobby to throw yourself into totally helps. My sewing machine has never seen so much love lol

  26. travelgirl1

    cantaloupe / 6630 posts

    @BlueWolverine: @NurseDMB: Think of you girls

  27. jaguar

    pomegranate / 3764 posts

    Hmmm.. if only I could actually DO any of those things.

  28. DesertDreams88

    grapefruit / 4361 posts

    @NurseDMB and @travellingbee: I'm so sorry to hear about your losses and the resulting impacts (ectopic scares, waiting for IF help, etc). The sadness of miscarriage is just too multi-faceted, it's so overwhelming.

    @MaryM & @ChaosMaven: I hear you on the issue of husbands not exactly um.... cooperating with the timeframe. It stinks to have to "plan" it, but really, there only is a limited window! Sometimes it seems like a darned if we do, darned if we don't situation. If I tell my DH too much, he gets anxious and it doesn't work out, if I tell him too little, he is just tired and set on going to bed. Hopefully we can figure out a better balance for the future. @ChaosMaven did you get a clear temp spike yet? Hoping for the best for both of you!

  29. BlueWolverine

    pear / 1510 posts

    Beta yesterday was five - completely expected. Things are pretty much over and I'm ready to move on. Doc recommended waiting a cycle, but I don't think we will.

    @travelgirl1: ThanK you. It's been a rough few days.

  30. jaguar

    pomegranate / 3764 posts

    @BlueWolverine: You just do what your gut tells you! x *hugs*

  31. hilsy85

    squash / 13764 posts

    @BlueWolverine: glad you can move on! We were also told that we might want to consider waiting a cycle but we're not really (although I doubt it will happen this cycle anyway). I hope that you guys have your sticky baby soon!

  32. HappyBluebird

    clementine / 957 posts

    Happy Thanksgiving to everyone in this group! Hope your day is full of things and people to be thankful for!

  33. jaguar

    pomegranate / 3764 posts

    No Thanksgiving here, but Happy Friday all the same. I'm grateful to have you guys here supporting me, and continuing to support me, as we tredge through this together. I hope I can do the same for you! x

  34. HappyBluebird

    clementine / 957 posts

    @jaguar: happy Friday to you!

  35. simplyfelicity

    cantaloupe / 6634 posts

    Happy thanksgiving to you lovely ladies!

  36. NurseDMB

    kiwi / 643 posts

    Happy Thanksgiving ladies! Unfortunately our power went out at our house from the snow storm. Thankful that we can stay at my moms house, I would have felt so bad if we had to keep DS in our freezing house.

    @BlueWolverine: so sorry. But I'm glad you can start to move forward. ❤

  37. jaguar

    pomegranate / 3764 posts

    Okay, another pregnancy test picture in Georgia's mums group... 2nd cycle trying. When does this ever get easier?

  38. hilsy85

    squash / 13764 posts

    @jaguar: ugh so sorry I hope it is your turn ASAP! I keep checking the POAS threads for some reason--I guess I'm masochistic?--and it kills me every time I see a BFP. I need to stop that.

    I hope everyone that celebrates had a good Thanksgiving! Ours was pretty good--good food and limited drama, can't ask for much more And as a bonus, I was at least able to drink during it (would have been a much less enjoyable thanksgiving without the wine to numb some of the dumb and snarky comments). I am also having some ovulation signs the last few days, which makes me feel hopeful that my body is getting back on track. I am also temping now, which at least makes me feel like I am doing something. Just wishing this month away so we can move on to December cycle--although it's looking like there's a possibility DH and I will be traveling separately over the fertile window, which would really suck.

  39. NurseDMB

    kiwi / 643 posts

    @jaguar: so sorry.

  40. jaguar

    pomegranate / 3764 posts

    @hilsy85: I'm the same, just can't help myself.

    I've started back on the tracking and charting this month too. I guess the test will be if the Femara works this month. I really hope it does!!!

    @NurseDMB: I'll get over it. Decided for my mental health it would be best if I left a few Facebook groups, since all it does is upsets me. x

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