My daughter turns 6 in a couple of months, and wanted to have a pottery painting birthday party. She's in kindergarten and aftercare, and unfortunately we haven't connected with any parents in her class, and I don't have a good sense of whether kiddo has made any specific friends, except a couple that she mentions on occasion. So thinking ahead to the party, I've been asking her every few weeks who she's thinking of inviting. There are a few names that she mentions from her class, but more often, she wants to invite kids from her aftercare who are a few grades above her (3-4th). I have no doubt that they're sweet kids who treat her well, and my daughter is an only child and is naturally drawn to older kids, but it feels weird to invite a bunch of 9-10 year olds to a 6 year old's birthday party. I would have no issue if they were older siblings of other kids coming, but this would be inviting them directly and it feels odd. So I wanted to gut-check it with the group - am I overthinking this? Would it be weird? And if it is weird, how do I talk to my daughter about it without making it seem like she can't be friendly with older kids?
-
This is a tough one! Honestly I do think it’s a little weird if they’re not family or sibling friends, mostly as in they may not want to go to a 6yo party (although I guess you never know!), not that wouldn’t have a good time. I am stumped for how to talk about it though! Maybe just focusing on let’s invite other kids from your class and the setup of party is meant for 6yo kids? I wish I had a better answer!
-
@bhbee: I do too! Thanks for your thoughts. There are a few kids in aftercare from other kinder and 1st grade classes she's gotten close to, so I'm hesitant to say to invite just her class, but I'm struggling to figure out how to explain the age thing!
-
@Mrs. Carrot: I might just fib and say the party is for 5-7 year olds (or whatever makes sense). Could she bring cookies to aftercare sometime that would feel like she got to celebrate with the older kids? (That may be too big a group, just throwing it out there)
-
Could you ask the teacher and/or after care who DD's playmates are? They would probably have a sense if the older kids are really DD's friends. If they really play together I don't think it's odd.
-
I would stick to her age group and her main classroom. I like the idea of bringing cookies to the aftercare group so she can celebrate with them too!
-
@Mrs. Carrot: it's not the same, but my kids have a babysitter that picks them up after school, and our sitter has developed a whole pack of nanny/nanny kids that basically play together almost every day after school. They range in age from 3-6 years old, and my kids have been invited to all their parties. And we've gone to most of them! So like my 5.5 year old has been to a 3 year old's party and had fun and liked it. I mean, they see each other probably 4 out of 5 days of the week after school, so even though I don't really know the kids or the parents, I figure the kids know each other and that's enough.
-
Do you know any moms from the after care group? Bc honestly if I was an older parent in that after care group, and my kid was invited to a younger students party, I wouldn’t think it was weird but I wouldnt make a great effort to go.
My six year old also plays with bucnh of 4-6th graders at church and she always wants a play date. I just told her straight up they are prob not interested bc they are older. I don’t sugarcoat things (sometimes to a fault) but she got over it. She still plays with them (they are super sweet to her) but I’m pretty sure if I invited any for play date, they wouldn’t really want to come. It’s one thing to play with a younger kid in a certain situation when you’re there together (ie church or aftercare) but a whole different thing to actively play together in an outside setting.
-
I'm so glad you asked this! We will be facing the same issue in a few months. My only child will be turning 6 and wants to invite some aftercare kids. There are a couple who are in 1st grade, so that doesn't seem strange. But there's a 3rd grader who is so sweet to him. He'd like to invite her, but I also don't know if it would be weird. I'm learning towards no, but mostly because of space.
-
@misolee: I don't know any moms at all unfortunately, so that adds to the weirdness of this. And your response is exactly what I'm anticipating happening, so I appreciate that reinforcement.
-
I might be a dissenting opinion here but my DD is 5 and she went to daycare with some older girls before they went to kindergarten and then they would be with her for before and after care. She has since been in 2 yrs of preschool away from them...but her brother now goes to the old daycare so she sees these girls when I pick up ds. They are friends but they are in second grade while DD is in preschool. They've been invited to DD's parties and we've been to theirs. It was a little harder for DD to fit in at theirs bc they had all older girls from their classes but she still had fun and we'll keep going so long as we're invited.
And I think with your party plan (painting pottery) it would be well suited for those a tad older....so I'm a vote for inviting the older kids as well as those in her class
- Google Plus
- Stumbleupon
- Twitter
- Facebook
- Pinterest
- Favorite0
10 comments