My dad is possibly the most generous person on earth. Literally. I'm not sure I've ever met some one with a heart as big as his. His goal in life is to make sure we're all well taken care of, whether it's friends, family, or extended family. He's been successful and I think being able to take care of the rest of us is his own measure of true success.

DH told me last night that my dad offered to pay for half of my stepson's education savings (RESP). I'm not sure if he meant half the amount for this year only, or total. My SS's family is not well off. They're comfortable, but I'd say lower middle class. His biomom is a single mom, she works hard and has a strict monthly budget. As far as I know, there is no RESP set up for my SS yet.

DH didn't give my dad an answer as he wanted to talk it over with me. Honestly, I'm not sure. First, it's a VERY generous offer, one I'm sure he's made for my nephews (and likely been taken up on), and I'm sure he'll do the same for DH and I when we have our own kids.

I love that my parents have embraced my SS as one of their grandchildren. It's wonderful to see in what is an unusual family set up for our little bubble (my family is very white picket fence). They've been so open minded and loving, and it's amazing to me that it would extend this far.

But on the other hand, I feel a bit like this type of generousity could be an over extension. SS has four sets of grandparents essentially (bio-mom's parents, DH's dad & stepmom, DH's mom, and my parents), I'm not sure it's MY parents place to do this for SS.

And on another one of my many hands, I also feel like I don't want SS's bio-mom to know THAT much about my family. We've kept some very clear boundaries to protect both DH and myself. If my dad all of a sudden plops a pile of cash into an account for SS I'm sure she's going to take notice. I also don't want to make her uncomfortable thinking that she "owes" something to my parents.

And on my last set of hands, I wonder about our kids down the road. Is it fair that my parents would contribute to their education but not their half sibling?

DH and I haven't had a chance to talk about it, and I don't think I'm even supposed to know my dad has made this offer. Thoughts? What would you do if you were in my shoes?