My relationship with my MIL has been strained since DD1 was born, and even more so after we had to live with them for 5 weeks while we were waiting to close on our new house. But, since then, I've been trying to let more things go and things have seemed to improve... until the past week.

Last weekend she:
- Brought up (yet again) that she'll take DD1 to go get a tattoo when she's 16 to cover up her birthmark. (it's the size of a mole on her chest, and covered up 99% of the time with clothes, but she still thinks it's something that needs to be removed from sight)

- Told me that she wants to bring DD1 with her to go get her hair dyed (permanently) pink in a few weeks.... she's only 3.5 yrs old!!

- After I told her that DD2 couldn't have any sweets (because she's only 14 months), and that DD1 could only have one sweet (because she's very sensitive to sugar), she waited until I went to the bathroom and then gave DD2 a cookie and gave DD1 2 popcicles, 2 cookies and a bowl of fruit snacks

and for the best part...
When it was time to leave, I was packing up all the wet clothes (it was a pool party at their house), DH had just finished changing DD2 into dry clothes and set her down outside to get DD1 out of the pool. DD2 heads right for the hot tub and starts climbing in, head-first (only 14 mo, can't swim!). All while MIL was sitting on the edge of the hot tub with wine in her hand , laughing and saying "baby's going in! better get her!". I had to run across the yard and dive in to get her instead of my MIL (who was inches away!) acted like it wasn't her responsibility to grab her own grandchild and prevent her from drowning.

Who does that???

I'm not one to usually say anything to her, but I was so pissed and seeing red after this experience that, after we got the girls in the car, I ran back inside and told her "I'm sure you always mean well, but you need to put my children before your well being. And when I tell you to not do something when it comes to my children, I would appreciate it if you could listen to me instead of going behind my back". She tried to respond with "Oh I didn't realize....", but I cut her off, said "yes you did", and turned and left.

DH is on my side, and I told him that the girls are not allowed to stay at her house without us until they can swim on their own because I can't trust her to save them.

Sorry for the novel...