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I turned my son ff well before two. For one simple reason - I couldn't bend my pregnant belly in the way necessary to get him in the car seat if it was rear facing.
If someone had told me I was doing something wrong, it would've just made me feel like a bad parent and not actually changed anything.
Personally, I feel cosleeping is very unsafe. I has a cousin die while cosleeping. I don't tell people that if they mention they cosleep (unless they ask) because I know it probably won't change anything for them. I will share, though, with close friends who I am more likely to influence, why we don't cosleep (meaning bed share, we do room share).
If you feel passionately, maybe contact your local senator or representative and see if they would sponsor some rear facing legislation? Or focus on educating not yet parent friends? Or just keep sharing on social media?
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@Mrs. Blue: I never said ppl who do ff are "terrible parents". It sounds like you have a circumstance which makes sense for your situation.
As other posters suggested, and as I've said, it seems best to continue sharing information on my feed (positively), and not single anyone out. I would never want to imply that someone is a bad parent ... Especially since most of us care so much!
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@Vegmama: I understand and I think you are coming from a good place. Just wanted to share a little bit from the other side.
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Maybe you should channel your passion into becoming a licensed car seat technician?
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@Vegmama: Just for a little perspective, I drove home with my 5 month old from a cottage yesterday and he screamed/cried/whined for 4 hours straight. My mom and I were just about insane by the time we got home. He didn't sleep for almost 8 hours straight cause he was so wound up from the drive, and his nighttime sleep was crap because he was so overtired. I feel like I have PTSD. I am actually so glad that I live in Australia where it is legal to forward face at 6 months, because I feel like any safety that would come from having him rear facing is negated by how distracting/dstressing it is to have him rear face. After 2 hours I couldn't concentrate on anything except the screaming, and even with multiple breaks, cuddles, feeds, any distractions we could think of, still it continued. I appreciate that there is a lot of evidence to support rear facing past one year old, but if someone had pointed that out to me after the drive I had yesterday I probably would have had a meltdown.
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I wouldn't take parenting advice from some one on Facebook. I take my job as a parent very seriously and expect that others do to. No one is more an expert in my daughter then I am. I understand you're coming from a good place, but you don't know why someone else makes different decisions. Post on your wall if you must and leave it at that.
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I've been thinking about this as we bought a car seat specifically so we can RF our tall daughter as long as possible. BUT we also have an old 60s truck with a bench seat that we've recently been driving more so she's forward facing in the front seat. I know this isn't as safe as her driving in our other car RFing in the back seat but we still have to get around and considering car seats in the 60s looked like beach chairs, I know she's infinitely safer now and would be offended if someone commented on my facebook photo of her or messaged me afterward.
So coming from someone who agrees with you, I still would be offended. Definitely keep posting on your own page, but I wouldn't call someone out.
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@ScarletBegonia: That's so tough. Sorry you are going through that!!! My LO is not a fan of the car, either, and I know how mentally exhausting it can be to hear a baby crying for so long (and then not able to calm when it's done). I was reading up on AUS car seat info, and it's really interesting how things are so different there. Even the look of the seats, and the way the straps work. Do you guys have national standards for seats? Here, it's a state by state basis, which makes it confusing.
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I think I've gathered that no one here would ever like to be told how to parent. Thanks! I talked to my husband about this the other night, as I think I came off as condescending and snarky, but honestly, I figured more people here would be open to advice (considering many of us ask for it here). I was hoping there would be advice on how to nicely share targeted information, but as many of you suggested, my husband also agreed that you can only do so much ... And, when approaching someone individually, you risk them thinking you're questioning their parenting. Or worse, that you think they've made the choice without researching.
I still stand by my point that babies are safer rear facing until 2. It's a scientific fact. We will do it, but I now understand reasons why it works for some families to forward face (you're pregnant, and it's hard to get the kid in, the kid hates sitting rear facing and screams, or they get extremely car sick).
Again, everyone can stop telling me how terrible of an idea it is to share info with my friends. I've gathered that most people would find it offensive.
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@vegmama I read about half the responses here, and regardless of safety or what is legal or right.... 15 years ago people had no idea what other people were doing with their kids unless they saw them in person where concerns could be dealt with in real time and people traded parenting advice in their driveways along with recipes and musings about the weather. I know you are coming from a place of love and care, but people are not putting photos out there to get advice from their peer group. This is a problem of our generation, too much information, where I would prefer to be blissfully unaware. I vote hide people on FB that bug you for whatever reason. If you see things in person that you find concerning, I feel like that is a more appropriate time and place to address them, by seeing people in person it means you have an established relationship with them and face to face communication is better received. You always have permission to give me gobs of parenting advice. Just my .02, love you!
I hit reply on page one, I just saw your wrap up from a bit ago. Bleh, sorry this has left you feeling a little bummed.
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