Hellobee Boards

I've been in the same situation. When I got engaged, my friends weren't supportive either, but they were supportive to the other girls they were bridesmaids for last summer. It made me so mad...and sad. Now those same girls are continually telling me not to have kids yet....but when others have babies its all sunshine and unicorns because "its a different situation." Ugh.

It hurts because these all girls have been my friends since we were little and 2 of them were college roommates. I've found that I have had to distance myself because otherwise I just get hurt. I think since I'm usually easy going and quiet, people assume its okay to tell me how to live my life.

So I've treated them how I wanted to be treated for so long and it never helped, so now I'm just ignoring them for my own sanity!

I first treat others how I want to be treated but if they treat me badly then I reciprocate.

@Andrea: Yeah, that's what I mean, too. I had friends who I had invested so much of my time and energy into and they didn't care so I stopped caring, too.

My way of dealing with the situation would be to not offer any help or support until she asks for it. That way she will learn what it's like to need your friends during such an important life event and be ignored. But once she approached me about something I would be there for her - although I wouldn't ever go out of my way to help by making suggestions or tagging along on appointments, I'd just be there to listen to her.

@ARTBEE I am with you too. Thats exactly how I am. Your wedding experience reminds me some what of mine.
I am a huge people pleaser and I def let things go! I find it easier to do things for others before myself. Even though that does seem to "burn" me a lot of times.
My Grandfather always said that even when people are mean or not nice to you that you should "Kill them with Kindness" always gets more results than being mean or holding grudges!

I was thinking about that a few days ago, but I decided not to treat people how they treat me. I will try to live by example and let God deal with them. Who knows, my positive energy may rub off on them. If I notice that people in my life are toxic, then I distance myself, yet I remain kind. It has been hard to deal with, but I am working on it.

I'll treat everyone nice but if they don't reciprocate, I don't waste my time with them. Life's too short, I'll hang out with people I appreciate and who appreciate me.

Ditto to what @chopsuey119 said.

i try to treat people as i want to be treated. if they wrong me though, it depends on how badly. if it's so bad that their friendship is not worth it, i'd probably just stop talking to them lol. but i don't have those kinda people in my life right now so...