Hellobee Boards

Can you just say you already have something in mind for the larger items and for the smaller ones, just take them and either hide them away in the attic when you get home or throw them out? (that sounds awful, but sometimes it seems kinder to take them and lie about what happens to them than refuse!

Just be over the top nice. Say something like "thank you SO much! but we have been looking forward to buying new stuff for the baby and I've got my eye on a few things!"

Lol! I posted something similar months ago. Umm... I just took some stuff (never intending to use it) and tried as politely as possible to decline other stuff. A particular point of contention was my SIL's 8+ year old stroller that's been through 2 kids. I was like "I know what stroller I'm getting already based on xyz research, but I can use that one for traveling or leaving at g'mas house." Then she couldn't even get it to open or close or something and I said we'd take it when she figured it out. Later in front on some friends she brought it up again and I was just very quiet but have no poker face and everyone laughed because they just knew it wasn't my style. I think I jokingly said how old it was with the 2 boys and "our princess" should get a new pretty carriage or something like that.
I think kind of joking about it and making myself look snobby but silly about that stuff diffused any offensiveness? I mean, we only get our firstborn once. They got their firstborn and new stuff they wanted, why shouldn't we if we can/want to?

Can you tell a little lie? Like, "thank you so much for the offer but so and so already planned on buying me one for a shower gift?"

@Cherrybee: My family has a bassinet like this. My grandfather slept in it when he was born, along with all of his kids and grandchildren...and now all the great grandchildren are sleeping in it, including my son. We're all taking great care of it, though...doesn't ever seem unsafe.

@Cherrybee: There is a safety issue with drop side cribs. I'm assuming if it's wicker the sides are all one piece?

We were offered my old drop side crib with DS and I wouldn't think if using it (it suffered through my brothers basement flood so it also is rusted and warped), but my other brother said he would take it, fix it up and make the side so it no longer dropped if they had any future children...sigh.

We either take and toss/donate or decline. I know it is costly but I personally prefer new items for baby (will reuse for sibling) because of all the germs and bodily fluids that get on everything. There was an issue with my parents wanting to use a 10+ year old car seat with DS and I had a fit! It's expired (which they didn't believe happens), doesn't follow today's safety standards and was nasty. Similar issue with a stroller. Thankfully both were beyond disgusting and had so much damage they finally gave up!

@anbanan15: my parents are convinced carseats do not expire, either. they think it's a money making scheme - they said carseats never expired when we were little! ><

@sorrycharlie: haha mine said the same thing!

@katiew92081: It was for their house only and only in case of an emergency situation but I still wasn't comfortable with it (it even had a chest bar!). We did our research and got a Britix for ourselves

I would just say no and eventually they will get over it.

Someone at church brought me a garbage bag full of old crib bedding (her child is 18). On top of being pretty horrible looking (pastels, plaids, dots and these strange rocking horses, all sort of swirled together), the majority of the bag was these stuffed, padded bumpers. I accepted them graciously, and took them to Goodwill on my way home.

I say something like this: "We have lots of stuff already. If you want I can take it off your hands because I know lots of people who could really use it if we don't." Then I give away and donate what I don't need.

My MIL offered us a bunch of old stuff and I declined it. Hubs was mad at me initially but once I explained that it was for safety reasons (no, I don't think a 20-year-old pack and play is safe!), he understood. And he stood his ground with his pushy mother (and aunts and cousins).

My mom tried to give me my childhood crib! I had to figure out how to say no because of safety issues. It turned out not to be a problem since she wanted DS to be safe too and then ordered my brother to buy us a new crib for a present.

UGH this is such a topic in my family too, mostly on DH's side. Thankfully my MIL often comes to my rescue by reminding her daughter that this is my first baby (and only grandchild #3 on my side, whereas DS is #10 on hubby's side) and we are excited to buy new things. I was seriously annoyed when SIL made me feel stupid yesterday for turning down a 2006 car seat that her friend gave her. Besides the fact that the car seat is really old, I dont even know who it came from!!

Anyways, for small things like clothing, I sometimes accept it and turn right around and drop it off at the Goodwill. Other things I politely refuse. There's nothing wrong with reminding them that you're really excited to buy new stuff for the baby, and try not to let anyone make you feel guilty for wanting that