My cousin wants me to dress Scribble up as an Indian and her kid as a pilgrim for a photo op. I feel uncomfortable with the idea. Is it racist? It feels racisty. But she wants to meet up tomorrow after church. So I need an idea for an alternative costume stat! I don't have the heart to tell her no. I just need to figure out something that works but isn't offensive.
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A turkey!
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http://www.target.com/p/toddler-turkey-costume/-/A-14142399?ref=tgt_adv_XSG10001&AFID=Google_PLA_df&LNM=|14142399&CPNG=Seasonal&kpid=14142399&LID=PA&ci_src=17588969&ci_sku=14142399&gclid=CJy-iZzJ_LoCFStBQgodGzUAVg
For if you are willing to pay money and can get her to hold off until thanksgiving maybe you can get it on time? If not, handmade.
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@googly-eyes: how can I do it? If I make him a feather hat, he will still look like an "Indian"!
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I think she wants to use it as t giving decor, so she's set on taking the pic tomorrow.
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@Mrs. Sketchbook: I think if you make big tail feathers people will think turkey not Indian?
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Or you could do a similar (less girly) headpiece with the big red beak?
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She really did not give you much notice did she?
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Oh they sell the turkey at party city, maybe they have it in store. Not sure where you are or if there are any nearby.
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@googly-eyes: she asked me like, 2 weeks ago and didn't set a specific date I was hoping she would forget. Then she texted Friday night asking was Sunday ok. As far as she knows all I have to make is a feather headband so she doesn't realize it is going to take me a long time.
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@Mrs. Sketchbook: Ahhh I see. Hmmm... The other thing would be maybe a pumpkin costume...sort of halloweeny but also thanksgivingy... Sorry I'm not much help here!!!
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@googly-eyes: no, you totally are! I think I just needed to talk it through. I didn't tell her I wasn't going to dress him as an Indian because I don't want to upset anyone, so just planning to show up and be like, oh we decided not to, etc.
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@Mrs. Sketchbook: I think you're on the right track and I think it would be racist - this is my go-to resource for reflecting on why it's not ok (just one post of hers I picked at random) http://nativeappropriations.com/2013/10/the-one-stop-for-all-your-indian-costumes-are-racist-needs.html
What about Plymouth Rock? Do you have grey pants and a grey top? You could write Plymouth on the front?
ETA apparently you'd write 1620 not Plymouth Rock, ha! http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Plymouth_Rock
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@Mrs. Sketchbook: There just aren't that many options..or options that aren't food, lol. I think I'd tell her ahead of time if you think she won't want to dress her lo up if you don't. But either way hopefully this won't be a big deal to her.
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How about you just do natural looking fabric - like a tan shirt and khakis? You could always "forget" the headband at home.
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@scg00387: I agree....although then I wonder, if dressing as an "Indian" is inappropriate then is it ok to dress as a pilgrim also? Like, is that just allowing one side of history to be represented in the pic? Making it seem like tgiving is all about pilgrims and no-one else? GAH. This is an awful situation to be in. Either way I look like a jerk. No matter now you cut it. And to top this my husband and I got into a fight over it because he does understand why it is a big deal. And it is his cousin, my in-law! I am so annoyed with all of this.
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@Mrs. Sketchbook: Is it possible that she just really doesn't get why it might be racist? Maybe you could just explain it to her honestly. Maybe say you have a friend who took offense when you told him/her of your plan? Or that you read something online. Or some other thing that will prevent her from feeling like you're talking down to her...
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Maybe a cornucopia? Wrap LO in a big piece of brown butcher paper and add some fruit cut outs
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@Mrs. Sketchbook: I think it's different, personally, because pilgrims are a historical group who no longer exist in present day. Native Americans are alive and well, and while I certainly don't presume to speak for a large group of widely diverse tribes (or presume that they all agree on the matter), there is plenty of evidence that it troubles many to be relegated to a costume.
But yeah, I feel for you! Tension either way is right. Fortunately I'm loud-mouthed about stuff like this on both sides so no one would ask me in the first place. At the end of the day, if you're uncomfortable with it I hope you go with your gut even if your son is too young to grasp the difference.
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@googly-eyes I think that is a good idea. A white lie of, a mom at playgroup was talking about why it bothered her, she sent me this link/article/whatever, and I'm just not comfortable with it after I thought about it more.
@HabesBabe: LOVE!
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@scg00387: yes, agree re: Indian, but still...is dressing like a Pilgrim like dressing as a Nazi or as any oppressive/genocidal group? Should I even let him be in a pic with a pilgrim? Gah, this is hard. My head hurts.
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@Mrs. Sketchbook: That's more of a grey area to me - so I'd go with what you're comfortable with. I'm not sure what I personally would do! Maybe she'd be up for just a fall colored theme? Reds/oranges/browns?
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@HabesBabe: great idea!
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Decided to delete since it contained identifiable information!
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Geez! Holidays are so complicated now a days!!!
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Ok this is what I came up with. It is attached to a stretchy headband so I can put it on his head or around his waist. Does it look like a turkey? Or racist Indian garb?
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@Mrs. Sketchbook: it definitely looks like a turkey! I still second the tail feathers though!
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@Mrs. Sketchbook: looks good!!
Was about to post this option: going as Thanksgiving dinner itself!!
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@Mrs. Sketchbook: I think it's cute! I'd put it around his waist so you can see his face!
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@Mrs. Sketchbook: definitely says turkey to me, and it's very cute to boot! I'm impressed you were able to put it together on such short notice
fwiw, I share your discomfort with "Indian" costumes and I think this is a great alternative!
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@mrbee: maybe I should bring a platter and some faux greenery and sit him on it!
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@Mrs.Panda: I agree that would be super cute. Just thinking hoe to put them on him in a way that they show up in the pic but also he doesn't immediately pull them off.....
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@Mrs. Sketchbook: that looks fantastic! So cute!
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@Mrs. Sketchbook: yeah not too sure about that lol. Maybe you can sew or otherwise affix feathers to some long sleeves? And you can write "Gobble Gobble!" On the shirt do there is no confusing him for a Native American.
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@scg00387: @mrbee: @MrsSCB: @78h2o: thanks y'all!
I also feel I should clarify, my DH understood why the original idea was bad, but didn't understand why I was trying to create an alternative costume at like, midnight the night before. He was like, why don't you just cancel ....but I have a hard time being anything other than totally amenable to the ILs! He can be more blunt with his family than I can.
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I love you for:
a) Refusing to dress your child up as a racist stereotype even though its considered acceptable by a large chunk of your country's population and may cause drama in your family.
b) For likening the pilgrims - the precious pilgrims - to the Nazis!!
c) Sending your child to a thanksgiving pilgrims and "Indians" photoshoot as a turkey! A turkey!!
I love the turkey by the way! Very creative!
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