Before I was married, I thought it would be nice to adopt if I had the money. It wasn't something I was set on doing. Now that I've had some infertility issues, adoption is definitely on the table now.
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I want to adopt one day. I would also say it wasn't something I thought about until more recently, but I would love to give a child a loving family who otherwise wouldn't have one.
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We are not adoptive parents (yet!) but I have always felt the call to adopt. When I was younger, I fully expected to never have children of my own and to adopt. I always felt like there was no point in bringing more children into a world where so many don't have parents.
Obviously, we have a biological child but I would still love to foster/adopt pre-teens and teenagers.
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I would love to adopt. It was really strong on my parents heart and they were never able to. I know it's something I hope I can one day do.
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I knew I always wanted to adopt.
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I had thought about it but I didn't think our first child would be adopted but infertility issues pushed it up to the front of the line.
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I've always known, but I've become more and more sure about it over the years.
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I've always thought it was a good idea, but by a long set of circumstances, I became really passionate about orphans living with HIV. That exposure made me decide adoption was a non-negotiable for me. We're not there yet, but I already think a lot about the LO we will bring into our family through adoption.
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@zippylef: I share your sentiment about bringing more children into the world with so many parentless kids.
For both that reason and the worries that we had during my pregnancy, I'd like to adopt if we decide to expand our family.
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Always thought we would
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@Mrs. Blue: When you do get to that point (if we haven't first, anyway) please share your experiences with me! We've also thought about adopting children living with HIV, possibly through Reese's Rainbow.
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We would loooove to! Maybe #3
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I used to be 100% sure that I wanted to adopt after having one of my own. But then I met DH and he didn't want to, he wanted to have biological children, unless of course we had infertility issues and couldn't have our own.
Now that we have one and know how hard pregnancy is on my body and migraines, DH is more open to the idea of adoption for us in the future.... depending on how many kids we decide to have.
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I've always wanted to, whether I could have biological children or not.
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We always wanted to adopt. We thought we would try to get pregnant for our first and then adopt the rest. When I couldn't get pregnant with mild intervention (Clomid) we decided to just go for it rather than further fertility treatments
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@Mrs. Blue: @Arden: If you guys do get to that point, check in with me. My friend works in the local infectious disease clinic and sees all the international HIV positive adoptees. A lot of people bring those kids home and had no idea what an impact it would have on their other children and life in general. It's a BIG deal. Not like bringing home a kid with a cleft lip that can be repaired.
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@Mrs. Jacks: Thanks. Yes, it is a huge deal, and there are many financial, physical, & emotional issues associated with bringing a child with HIV into your life. One of my good friends is HIV+, so I've had some close insight into the ups and downs of living it, though I'm not saying that is the same as your child having HIV. Mr. Blue hadn't had the same experiences I have and isn't there yet, and that is way too huge of a commitment to take on unless he is 100% on board. We'll see what happens in our future! What I meant earlier is that adopting a child is a non-negotiable for us, but whether we adopt one with HIV is completely up in the air. That experience is just what led me to become really passionate about adoption.
All that said, there are so many sweet kids who need good homes, and will often never have that because they have HIV. I think there are very few families who have both the financial ability to pay for healthcare and antiretrovirals and to be emotionally strong enough to deal with the impact of the disease on everyone around you. For families that can do both of those things, I think considering a child with HIV is important.
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@Mrs. Blue: sounds like you've thought a lot about it and are aware of the issues involved. In my town it has become a "popular" thing to do and many of these adoptive parents had no idea what they were getting into. It just seemed like a romantic/exotic thing to do.
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@Mrs. Jacks: Do you see a lot of these kids at work? I've noticed that adoption in general is very popular around here and I thought it might be related to the laws.
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I've always had a strong desire to adopt, even as a child I wanted to adopt children or foster. DH wants to try for our own babies first and adopt later. After almost a year of struggling I just want to get the process started.
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@Mrs. Jacks: I have noticed it becoming more "trendy" lately, which I feel conflicted about. On one hand, I love that there is more awareness of the need and accordingly, more awareness of HIV generally and of the realities of how it is and is not spread. On the other hand, like you're referring to, a child in a family who is not best equipped to handle all aspects of the situation is a disaster waiting to happen for everyone.
Sorry to thread jack!
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@Honeybee: Adoption in general is so popular here... and when families can't or don't want to have more kids for whatever reason biologically, they tend to switch to adoption. Because adoption can be expensive, many people choose medically complex children from here or abroad.
As far as I understand (and this could be rumor) there was one particular woman in the valley who adopted an HIV positive child and she was very well connected in her ward/socially, and the whole thing caught on... so we now see many HIV positive adopted children, but mostly on the outpatient side.
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@Mrs. Jacks: Thanks for your input! I didn't realize this was becoming a popular thing (that surprises me, actually).
We've always wanted to adopt children with special needs, and HIV+ is just one of the special needs we've considered.
It would be sometime in the future before we could pursue this (we need to be in a better financial position first), so we have a lot more time to look into it and think about it.I do know about the medical costs involved and the reality of living with HIV+ children in the home. I've talked to people online who have HIV+ children and I know its no small task, its a very serious thing.
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