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sort of, although not in how he dresses. The biggest thing was money. When we met he had a great job making good money and was still driving a 97 civic (in 2007) with a quarter panel missing and living on ramen the last week of the month because he was broke. He had a habit of blowing all his money on stupid shit (video games, etc) when he got it then not having enough to pay for like.... life. Within about 3 months we had some serious talks about how he needed to be an adult, set a budget, get some goals, and save some money. Within a year after that he'd completely stopped blowing his money, he was living within the budget he made, he'd saved enough for a down payment on an audi, and he had a credit card for emergencies (which he'd never had before!). He's never had an issue with overspending since.

Also I think I helped his confidence some, which helped him stop being douchey with regards to what he bought. When we first started dating he was a horrible label/price dropper. "I like your coat" "Oh thanks, it's _____ and I spent $400 on it." *eye roll*. It took me a little while but I did eventually convince him that anyone who gives a shit WHO he is wearing will already know and the rest of us don't give a shit and just think he sounds like an ass telling the price of everything he owns.

What would men do without us? lol

@mediagirl: lol, after seeing pics of him now I cant imagine what he looked like back then. My guy didn't need any help.

I changed my husband in the way he dresses only a little. His idea of dressing up was sad. Lol. Can't change his t-shirt and cargo shorts for every outfit except weddings. He even wore a tshirt under his tux at OUR wedding.

He grounded me out before we got married. I was a wild child with no future. His level head taught me a lot. All other changes since then were ones we made together.

When we met, he didn't have a bank account. He literally carried all the money he had in his wallet, which at the beginning of the semester was at least $1000 of his refund check. He's stubborn, but after six months of dating I got him a bank account.

It took getting married for him to get a new toothbrush though. I consider that my finest relationship achievement. I didn't even have to "accidentally" drop the old one in the toilet. The old one was soooo old (I get a new one every few months; this one was several years old).

In turn, he has mellowed me out and encouraged me to follow my dreams. He has been a big influence on me.

Lol at the jewelry, that's awesome! My H needed some help in the dressing department. He wore pretty baggy pants when we met, but we were in high school so I'll excuse it he always wants me to help pick out all his new clothes now though. And this is more abstract but I think he has helped me to be way more patient because he is a saint in the patience department.

I purposely looked for a relationship where there was no fixing going on. I'd been down that path a few times and realized it never ended well for me. I decided that if I couldn't live with how he was as a person, then I should move on.

Having said that, we both made each other want to be better people, so there was some self improvement on both sides that happened as a side effect of caring for each other

I changed the way he dressed. He would keep clothes forever, no matter how ill fitting or hole filled they were. So we went shopping and got him clothes that fit and got rid of clothes that he had for 10 plus years. I also convinced him his hair looks better on the longer side.

He helped me eat better and also helps me to be a little more chill and relaxed. I tend to be a very anxious person and a bit of a control freak and he's helped me let go of that a bit.

I changed his diet and his 'style'. He doesn't spend money clothes, but at least it's not old clothes that his mom picked out for him.

He changed my spending habits. I have no idea where I would be without that help!!

He started dressing nicer while we were dating. He gave me more knowledge about money.

We've definitely both changed for the better throughout our relationship, with the help of the other. A lot of it are habits- since when you're single your behavior doesn't effect anyone else! So better money habits, cleaning, etc. And we ask each other for fashion advice and sometimes shop together. But I guess I don't see it as changing each other? I think it was more of a natural thing- the way a college roommate might mold you over your 4 years. Since I think we as people are ALWAYS changing! There was very little about DH that I didn't love immediately. I've helped him work through some anger issues he's had (better manage his anger, I guess) and I've helped him buy less blue button downs and more, um, OTHER COLORS! But that is pretty much about it!

I kind of love that it's always a "work in progress" and we're constantly helping each other improve. I also love that this post made me remember all the good memories from when we met!

Hahah we knew each other 2 months when we got married, so no time to fix anything! Thankfully we didnt have any fixing to do.

Nope! I was looking for a guy who didn't need any work doing! I got tired of fixing up guys only for them to move on - all that hard work down the drain!!

If DH had tried to "fix" me, I would have fixed him right in the balls!

We are perfect human beings. What is there to change? Hehe. Just kidding. DH was really into gaming when I met him, which I didn't approve of since it's so time consuming. 8 years later, and DH rarely ever plays.

I didn't know how to cook when we first met. I was a disaster and didn't know any kitchen basics. Fast forward to having a very hungry toddler, and I figured out my way in the kitchen real quick. I made pasta fagioli last night. That's a huge accomplishment for me.

@Mrs. Jump Rope: @MrsMcD: haha! In a nutshell--We were matched on eharmony in aug 2009. We talked for a month via Skype, text phone. I knew he was the one after we talked on the phone for the first time.
We met in person in September.
Got married in October! Haha. (Eloped)
6 months later we had a church ceremony and reception with family and friends. 2 months after that I got pregnant with dd.
It's been a wild ride. 2 kids, almost 4 yrs of marriage and still happy as clams

@chopsuey: awwwww That's so awesome

No, I didnt change him. I did let him know he had more options then just doing what he'd always done, what his family had always done, or what his mother had always told him to do... and then he changed himself.

His mother had bought him tighty-whitey underwear his whole life (we were 18 when we started dating). After he moved away, one day he needed underwear. I pointed out that there were many other styles of underwear and that he could try out something new if he wanted. He chose black boxer briefs, and he loved them! He's never bought tighty-whiteys again.

Same with new foods, different clothes, political views... I just pointed out the array of options he could choose from besides doing what he'd always done, and he made his own changes!

I would say no, not that he didn't need fixing in some areas. My husband is at his core the same person, but he's maybe changed his clothing.

Hmm, we've been together for 9 years next week. I've definitely help influence him on certain things. He dresses better than when I met him thanks to the removal of some Cosby sweaters and old t-shirts. He also manages his money better thanks to me. I used to be a super saver. I'm a more moderate saver in the past decade, but still savings focused. We both like to cook, but I'm the healthier influence. I can definitely say that I've been a healthy influence on him. I think that he's changed for the better over the years.

Some days, I wonder how he would have been if he married his ex-girlfriend who used to be close to MIL. I think it would be a very entangled, lacking autonomy and boundaries kind of thing. I think that my influence on establishing boundaries with his mom and family has been huge for him. Over the years, she had to know all and caused trouble with his past relationships. I'm the first one to put up those boundaries and let us be "us." That's huge.

no fixing! but i have helped him to branch out & try new foods. and we've traveled a bunch together which is something his family never did when he was young.