Hellobee Boards

I inquire what the use is for, and if I approve then yes.

Nope. Well, we've never been asked and we don't have family nearby. If we were asked, I would guess it would be for a large amount. I wouldn't do it. It would put too much of a strain on family members. I would GIVE $20 or $40 but never in terms of a loan b/c I would never expect it back and wouldn't want bitter feelings.

I've loaned my parents money (a total of $800). I don't expect to get paid back and I only did it because I could stand to lose the money....my philosophy on loans is, only do it if you can look at it as a gift (and never expect to get repaid).

My cousin asked to borrow money and I told him no. There was no way he could pay us back since he wasn't working. Instead, I just sent him a couple hundred bucks as a "gift."

I'd ask why they needed the money, but no, I don't lend out money. Save maybe $20 or something small.

We haven't been asked to borrow money, but we've been expected to give money (to the ILs). I dunno what's worse, haha.

if it's immediate family, we typically don't expect it back (because we gift it to them, not because they don't pay it back). my family thinks of money as more communal, so we all give and we take.

extended family however..... i'd only lend it to the relatives i like!

My family has never asked. So's siblings/MIL often ask to borrow money. Before when it was his money, it was up to him what he did with it.

Now that we have joint finances, the rules are that SO and I agree on a payment plan ahead of time. His family must agree to it. If they fail to pay it back according to the plan, they lose all borrowing privileges.

So far it's been working.

That is really awkward. I would probably have responded the same as you.

My SIL asked DH for $1000 and we went back and forth as to whether we should do it... she's a single mom with a history of being really irresponsible. In the end we did it, she has paid us back some of it but there is always a story like "can you hold the check to cash until this date", etc etc. Such a troubling position to be in... And I'm worried now we've set a precedent that she'll try this again!

No. I either decline or give the money without expecting it to be paid back. I don't want to deal with the awkwardness of you not paying me back when you say you will, or whatever. I'd rather just give it and never discuss it again.

@autumnlove: he really put you on the spot, so not cool! How old is this kid? Asking for $20 for gas is one thing but outright $100 - I think he's totally taking advantage of our kindness!

I could never see anyone in my family asking to loan a small amount. Larger amounts I could see. In fact my father loaned my brother a good chunk so he could get to a 20% down payment on his house and not have to pay PMI. They had a payment plan in place with a small interest rate and it has never been an issue. My parents would have done the same for me with no problem but we live in a place with a much lower cost of living then my bro.

The only people in our extended family who I can think of needing to borrow small amounts are not responsible with money and would never pay it back. So I can't see us ever doing that.

I've never been asked by my in-laws for money. but I wouldnt want to encourace my BIL to just drop by and ask for $40 every now and then. I would loan money if it was an emergency

I've never been asked, but if I were, it'd depend on what they needed it for and the situation they were in. No money for food cause you wanted new TV and the latest gadgets? Sorry, you're on your own and need to learn a less. Lost a job and having a hard time? Sure, no problem. My husband gave his mom 5k to help pay for hospital bills once, if we can afford to help with something like that, then I dont have a problem with it at all.

I have gifted and will gift my brother/parents, younger cousins who are like siblings to me if/when they need it.

We do have a loan out to FIL because it's a large sum. He has the $, just needed liquidity, he's already paid us back half and the other half we'll have before the year end. I would do it again in a heartbeat.