Mine are on their way to visit from Ohio, and I'm....not very excited about it. They are fine people and all, but I just don't look forward to spending time with them....ever. It doesn't help that they have been very underwhelming grandparents to the LO as well, and I feel like when they come it, they don't really help us with the baby, they just make more work.
How do you feel about your in-laws?
GOLD / wonderful pea / 17697 posts
Yes, my ILs are like parents (and siblings) to me. I hit the in-law jackpot, and I'm well aware of how lucky I am. My MIL likes to say that she'll never been absolutely sure she married the right man but she's positive she married the right family...I feel the same.
grapefruit / 4110 posts
Unfortunately no. They aren't very good to my husband so I don't like that about them. But I put up with it. It isn't like they really care anyways. Seriously the 3 times they have visited my husband has had to guilt trip them into it.
pomegranate / 3398 posts
I am extremely blessed with my inlaws. I have a great relationship with my MIL and FIL.
honeydew / 7586 posts
My sister-in-law is one of my best friends. I love her dearly. My FIL is a nice man. My MIL is certifiably crazy though. I cannot stand her.
bananas / 9973 posts
Yes! In general I love my ILs! They treat me really well, and my FIL is more loving than my own Dad! My MIL loves me and I think I'm pretty lucky too! She has her moments (just typical dominant mom stuff) but overall she's really good to me. I've gone on many trips with them and it's always been smoother than traveling with my own parents that's for sure!
hostess / wonderful watermelon / 39513 posts
My MIL is opinionated and old fashioned but I still enjoy her company. My FIL is a nice guy but not that social.
coconut / 8279 posts
@FriedBabyMama: I feel the same way you do. I just have a MIL but she's rough with DS, distant emotionally from DH, brags about everything and that's when she's not complaining about her health. It's exhausting.
DS's first birthday was December 17. She told us she wasn't going to do anything for his birthday (her only grandchild, mind you) and was just going to roll it into Christmas. That's nice.
I don't really care when it comes to me or DH, but when it's DS I get really defensive 
bananas / 9227 posts
MIL assumed the following things before she'd even gotten to know me:
- That I never vacationed outside of the States, even if I told her I had (numerous times since she'd always ask), she assumed I was lying
- that I'd never had wine before
- that I never eaten common things, for example Italian food
- that I didn't know what Google Maps was even though I was the one that printed the directions she found in the car
- that I didn't have any money of my own and entirely gold-digging my cheaper than cheap DH
- that DH and I must have just met since he didn't tell her about me earlier
- that I weaseled my way into living with DH because she didn't understand the immigration process
She also failed to realize where I grew up exactly 1 year after she met me. One of the first things she asked me is if my mother works. Yeh, those are just a few things.
Looking back now, I don't know where or why she'd come to those conclusions. I'm not quick to accuse someone of racism, but it's obvious now that some sort of bigotry was/is at play.
There was a time where she stepped over the line with me and it made things difficult ... I even fell into depression because of it. But I made the command decision to never let anyone come between DH and I. I wasn't going to let her or anyone else ruin the life we were trying to build.
After saying all that (which, BTW was very therapeutic) I'm trying to look past everything and start anew for my DD's sake. For as long as she treats my DD well, which includes treating me with respect and common courtesy, then I'll continue trying. She also seems like she's trying - she hasn't had her passive aggressive bouts lately. I think she's starting to understand that if she's unpleasant, we wouldn't want to spend time with her, and why should we?
honeydew / 7589 posts
Eh... not really. FIL is not the nicest person and he doesn't seem to care about us very much at all. He has a strong preference for his daughters over his son, and it hurts me to see DH hurt by that. He's also a very negative person, and very judgmental and paranoid. He gives me migraines.
MIL is a good-hearted person, but our personalities just don't mesh. She's... "ditzy", and loves to talk about recipes and curtains and rom-coms, and lets her husband make ALL the decisions. I'm just SO not like that, and I get so bored after trying to talk to her for an hour.
clementine / 943 posts
My FIL is a nice man. My MIL is nice but hard to be around for long periods of time- she just can't ever relax and enjoy hanging out, she always has to be moving around or talking or asking questions, and she vocalizes EVERY thought that comes into her head. She has no tact, and no filter. She has the best of intentions, but not much taste.
It could be much worse.
GOLD / wonderful apricot / 22276 posts
To put it nicely, they aren't my favorite people. They always try and push things on us, never make sense 99% of the time, they have bad habits I don't want my LO around, but yet they don't understand why. MIL said when we got married she lost her son, but you'd think if she cared about me she would say she gained a daughter. They are not thankful for anything we do for them. It's their way or no way. I'll stop there 
I like my parents a lot, so that's good lol.
GOLD / wonderful coconut / 33402 posts
They are nice but they aren't anyone I would choose to spend time with. FIL tells us the same stories 5 times in one weekend and then every time we visit. StepMIL means well too but we just don't have much in common. Just not a comfy feeling like when we hang out with my parents. DH agrees with me.
cantaloupe / 6630 posts
I really lucked out and have really lovely, kind inlaws. I gained 5 BILs and 6 SILs as well and love them all.
cantaloupe / 6730 posts
I have great inlaws, but they live far away, so when we see them, it's for at least a long weekend. By the end of it, they are driving me craaaaaazy! To be fair, that would happen with my own family too.
pear / 1672 posts
Hmmm...considering how different I am from them, I feel very lucky in some respects. Like Smurfette, they are nice people, but I would not want to spend a lot of time with them.
They barely visit, and when they do my FIL acts like he and my MIL are doing us a favor and brags about the fact that they only visit for 24 hours or less. My BIL, his wife and our niece never visit. My BIL is a insufferable know-it-all. My BIL's wife is nice, but we're very different and don't have much in common. My MIL is actually pretty cool, and I enjoy talking to her, but she'll spread your business in a hot minute (picture the town cryer).
GOLD / wonderful olive / 19030 posts
I have amazing inlaws, my MIL is actually babysitting for us now & she surprised us that she's making dinner for us too so I don't have to when I get home from work. They are generous people and LO is lucky to have them in her life, as am I!
GOLD / wonderful grape / 20289 posts
Love them!
As far as helping with LO goes.... they love love love her and try so hard to take over and play whenever they see her. But it's not their fault.... LO won't let them. She's crazy attached to her mommy and daddy and the only other person she lets take her is her Grandma (my mom). I feel so bad because all they want is to hold her!
coconut / 8472 posts
I'm not big on most them, unfortunately. I do like my BIL, I think we got a lot closer after the wedding. I also like my FIL, but he wasn't a great dad growing for my DH growing up.
My SIL is very sweet, but we don't have a lot in common and she sometimes drives me crazy. She's 26 and can't support herself. She's always been babied by her family and it shows. She also complicates things for me because she's Vegan, and I don't care for most vegan food.
My MIL is the type like @Bao:'s to think she lost a son instead of gaining a daughter. She's nice to my face, but it's quite apparent that I am not considered a daughter. For example, she's more concerned that her daughter not be offended by non-vegan food, than over whether I'll be able to eat anything.
She's also said things to DH behind my back which I don't appreciate, like on our rehearsal dinner night she got really offended because I handed out the attendant and attendant and parent gifts and not everyone got one. She told DH (the night before our wedding!) how rude I was. The only people that didn't get gifts were her daughter, who dropped out of the wedding 2 weeks before it, and her boyfriend, who got dumped later that night and she still brought to the wedding!
cantaloupe / 6800 posts
They're ...okay.
My MIL is actually pretty cool, but she thinks my dog is going to kill her grand daughter or any other person, including her. Which is so laughable, seeing as how my dog hasn't even ever looked at someone weird.
My FIL trys to be nice to me, which I appreciate but he's annoying more often than not 
My BIL(married to DH's sister) is pretty cool
My SIL is a self-centered braggy little bitch. She repeats everything she says, which is usually something about herself/ her possessions. I can't stand to be around her anymore, which is sad because she didn't used to be that way.
My niece is a mini- SIL. She has no discipline or manners. She's a wild-child to say the least.
As far as DH's grandparents, aunts, cousins, etc. I absolutely love them all. They go above and beyond to make me feel like family.
pineapple / 12793 posts
FIL is fine.
SILs and BILs are great.
MIL is very very difficult. She has been pretty horrible to me and disappoints DH constantly. It's hard for me to watch when she is dismissive of his attempts to spend time with her.
honeydew / 7504 posts
Uhhh...they're lovely people and have the best of intentions, but they drive me crazy. MIL is very gossipy and nosy, and doesn't know how to take no for an answer. FIL is the most negative person in the world. I do love my BILs, though - I grew up with the younger one, so I've known him forever, and the older one is a great guy.
And when the entire family gets together (like EVERY holiday), it's very overwhelming and exhausting for me. Again, they're all very nice people, but they're very different from my family. They're all involved in each other's business, and it's very loud when they're all together. There's always like 20-40 of them. I grew up going to quiet, low-key family gatherings of, like, 10 people. So it's very difficult for me to spend extended lengths of time with Hubs' family.
pomelo / 5331 posts
Yes. They're really nice people and when I see other stories about other people's in-laws I'm like, wow. I really got lucky. B
But. They can be a bit overbearing. FIL talks. A LOT. And is kind of pushy. MIL is a little bit of a drama queen and likes to cry a lot about how much she misses DH (she lives in NY, we live in Florida), how much she wishes she could send us more money and pay our mortgage for us (??), etc. It makes DH feel really bad. I don't know if she does it on purpose as a guilt trip (he swears she doesn't) or if she's being genuine, but it gets to be a little much sometimes. At my wedding, when the bridesmaids and she and I were all getting ready, one of my bridesmaids told her that her hair was beautiful and she stated, awkwardly and loudly, "It's a wig. I had breast cancer. I lost all my hair. This isn't real hair." She also informed me the other day that she's more excited about LO's impending arrival than I am. Stuff like that.
It could be worse, though. I think they're just parents, to be honest. No worse or better than my dad, who also drives me batty sometimes (in different ways). They all like me very much and don't try to undermine me or anything.
pineapple / 12234 posts
No. They were inadequate parents to DH and they are both selfish. We don't talk to them often anymore.
nectarine / 2152 posts
Ehhhh...could be better, could be worse. They have good intentions, at least.
blogger / wonderful cherry / 21628 posts
Yes, they are wonderful! I love them like my own family.
| Today | Monthly Record | |
|---|---|---|
| Topics | 1 | 0 |
| Posts | 0 | 1 |
Ask for Help
Make a Suggestion
Frequently Asked Questions
Bee Levels
Acronyms
Most Viewed Posts
Hellobee Gold
Hellobee Recipes
Hellobee Features
Hellobee Contests
Baby-led Weaning
Bento Boxes
Breastfeeding
Newborn Essentials
Parties
Postpartum Care Essentials
Sensory Play Activities
Sleep Training
Starting Solids Gear
Transitioning to Toddler Bed
All Series
Who We Are
About the Bloggers
About the Hostesses
Contributing Bloggers
Apply to Blog
Apply to Hostess
Submit a Guest Blog
Hellobee Buttons
How We Make Money
Community Policies
- Google Plus
- Stumbleupon
- Twitter
- Facebook
- Pinterest
- Favorite0
29 comments